Got stared at in the restroom

[GrinitchSpinach]

Another day, another male who feels entitled to use women's spaces. Responses all support the male's "right" to be there, discount the woman's obvious discomfort with the male's presence.

Why and how on earth (please explain with workings!) would a mother taking her young daughter to the women's toilet, ever, ever represent a threat of violence towards a man who should not have been there anyway, in the women's toilet?!

Bonkers!!!

PennyLaneIsInMyHeart, disagreeing with someone or failing to arouse their interest on a particular issue doesn't inherently make you a bigot. Please don't wind yourself up just because you have a different opinion.

To put this in context, Gronky, the poster seemed most concerned with the poster's appearance and explicitly found any potential threat of violence funny, cf the rest of the poster's message:

The poster was amused by friend's misunderstanding of the double meaning, in American English, of the word "clocked." (Can mean either "observed/noticed" or "punched.")

To put this in further context, according to Wikipedia (I'm sure could find further sources with more effort but I need to bathe children now), in the U.S. in 2014 "Men accounted for 80.4 percent of persons arrested for violent crime." And in 2011 "Males constituted 98.9% of those arrested for forcible rape."

So yes, I feel the mother in the ladies' room with her child was not unreasonable or wrong to LOOK at a male person in that intimate space.

Grinitch

Sorry, but to be honest, given the text and no sources I had absolutely no idea what was happening here.
So, what we are saying, is that it was the one writing the report who was trans, and complaining about a mother and her child in their correct place?
If that is the case then I stand corrected and totally agree, but when I clicked on the text there simply was not enough information.

So, the TW has a "girlfriend", which is quite common nowadays - what with the "girldick" phenom which is all the rage nowadays and the "lesbianleftie" nonsense.
Sorry for the earlier comments but the whole thing has finally clicked into place.
Jeez, what a world we live in, unbelievable!

Jeez, what a world we live in, unbelievable!

It's a little unreasonable to use the threat of implied sexual violence against anyone (even someone you disagree with). To carry on being clear, I don't believe the mother in this event was knowingly doing so but, with this knowledge in mind, it doesn't seem terribly pleasant to continue supporting her actions

There was no implied 'sexual violence' whatsoever. The mother looked sternly at the person. She was in there with a child. The case you have brought up was two women drunkenly groping the trans person.
Are you seriously suggesting that this person feared that the mother was about to do that?

it's a little unreasonable to use the threat of implied sexual violence against anyone

Male-bodied people in the ladies are a walking threat of implied sexual violence to many or most women, whether they mean to be or not.

People's personal relationships are totally irrelevant in this.

I think most of us are in favour of people being happy together, whatever their identities and genitals!

But in the UK, it is generally accepted that women's toilets are for the exclusive use of women and girls; very young boys accompanied by mum are also acceptable.

But 19-year-old men? No, they are not women. Never have been, never will be. They belong in the Men's. Why are they bullying women about this?

And of course, of fucking course the friend absolutely nailed it with

...she's just a freaked out cis

He knows. He absolutely knows the woman was intimidated.

Crikey. If we all stopped eating whenever anyone of the opposite sex looked at us, the diet industry would fold!

Lucky to have a rest room. I've never worked anywhere that had one for women or men. What do people do there, read magazines or sleep? I think if there had ever been a rest room in my work place I'd have fallen asleep and not gone back to work after my break.

So ‘genetic woman’ as a descriptor
People can’t change their genetics, genetics dictates their sex, making them male or female.
How anyone presents their appearance, what sex stereotyping they want to convey in that, or not is up to them and that’s fine. Genetics will always stay the same despite hormones and body modification, clothes hairdos, make up or lack of.

Why should (genetically- defined) men (which would include transwomen) get to dictate to (genetically-defined) women (which would include transmen) what rights to privacy, safety and dignity they are allowed to have in confined spaces like female/women’s/ladies public toilets? These spaces are Intended as, and are used as, a single sex space. Ie for the use only of women and girls, including transmen.

I love it how between a mother with her child and a male person intruding in the women's bathroom, the mother is the one accused of being threatening and 'implied sexual violence'

D A R V fucking O.

On the feminism and women's rights board, no less.

Lucky to have a rest room

Agree. But sad to have all these rooms with baths and beds but no toilets.

The case you have brought up was two women drunkenly groping the trans person.

Allegedly.

"Avoided eye contact" and "bolted"

Hmmmmm it's almost like hey knew they shouldn't be there 🤔

Lucky to have a rest room. I've never worked anywhere that had one for women or men. What do people do there, read magazines or sleep? I think if there had ever been a rest room in my work place I'd have fallen asleep and not gone back to work after my break

Not sure if this is a genuine weird post or whatnot but a restroom is what they call public toilets in the USA.

the vast majority of genetic women aren't a threat to trans women.

Women are concerned about men. Although it’s usually possible to tell somebody’s sex it’s very difficult to know their gender identity. How do you know that a stranger is a trans woman?

I have a young daughter, I would behave exactly the same as the mother in this scenario. That's what mothers do.

to use the threat of implied sexual violence

Would any woman read that post and think there was any implication of sexual violence from the mother in this situation?

And Datun is spot on (as usual) when she picked out the “freaked out cis” phrase. These people enjoy the feeling of power it gives them to be seen as different and thus intimidating.

sackrifice I was also being sarcastic. I know this is normal terminology for a toilet in the US and I think Canada. However I think terms like ‘rest room’ avoid the reasons that we use a toilet. This is particularly relevant here as men and women use toilets differently.

The author comes across as a complete drama llama - already nervous before the bathroom incident aka looking for something to write about online for Reddit upvotes complain about