National Autistic Society and Mermaids [Title edited by MNHQ]

[GColdtimer]

My friend just posted this on Facebook this morning. She isn't on MN so I have her permission to share. She would really like more people, especially people with ASD or who have children with ASD, to write to NAS thanking them for their willingness to listen and their agreement that Mermaids is not reputable.

This is really great news so please can we keep this bumped and shared. Thank you.

If posters on the SEN board would like to share that would also be great (if appropriate).

Dear XXXX ,

Thank you for your feedback regarding the Gender and autism page on our website.

I’m writing to let you know that I’ve raised your concerns regarding Mermaids UK, one of the organisations we link to on our Gender and autism page, with a number of teams within the National Autistic Society. In light of the concerns raised in your message, and of other feedback that we have received, we have decided to remove all links to Mermaids UK from our website, while we take the time to consult with relevant professionals and to reconsider which organisations we wish to place links to on our website.

As such, our Web Team are working to remove all links to Mermaids UK from our website as soon as possible. Please do be aware, however, that, as we are currently in the process of updating our website to reflect our new branding and organisational identity, it may take a few days for this to be actioned.

Thank you again for bringing this to our attention, and I hope that you are satisfied with the actions we are taking in light of the concerns that you have raised.

Kind regards,

National Autistic Society

[Edited by MNHQ to remove personal info]

Oh and having an ex and a pal who are autistic doesn’t make you anything approaching an authority and I actually find it quite offensive that you assume it does

^ exactly this. It is really reaching to use that as a reason to poke your nose into a charity you don’t rely on yourself.

I think some transactivist circles see a lot of appropriation of autistic identity too.

Please imagine the appalling absurdity of going to a meet up for autistic women and having to be polite (as an autistic person who finds this hard) to an Allistic male. Who self identifies as autistic and as female.
It's not conducive to a supportive context for women who are incredibly isolated when we have autism

To have autism is to woman incorrectly.

Also, the staggering arrogance to tell me and others what or who we are while making a frankly ridiculous fuss about not being heard is grossly offensive.

You don’t get to tell me who I am, I don’t get to tell you who you are.

What I will do is loudly tell you what you are not, in factual terms.

Feel how you want to feel, I’ll accept that, until the moment you want to oppress anyone else to further your agenda. Then you’ll hear me.

To clarify, I am an autistic woman, I am a mother and I don’t fit into any of the neat little boxes you choose to put me in.

I am so glad that my parents are sensible people. When I was a child I played with boys' toys and was a tomboy. I was also a bit odd but my parents were happy to let me be myself.

I shudder to think what would have happened if poisonous groups like Mermaids had got their talons into me or my parents.

Piss off, Mermaids, TRAs and handmaidens and let the NAS work within its remit, which is to help autistic people like me and our families.

Who protects the autistic lesbian when she is told she should attracted to trans-women?

Nobody protects us in my experience.
Even if we are young.
Even if we temporarily identify as Trans.
Even if we disclose a history of abuse and say this is why we don't want penis sex.

Generally the groups who should protect us are complicit eg allsorts groups.

the-art-of-autism.com/gender-identity-issues-and-females-on-the-spectrum/

I identify with a lot of this.
It's not from a feminist perspective and the concept of male brain is old fashioned by feminist and by autism standards.
But in terms of experiences a lot of this was me.

Who protects the autistic lesbian when she is told she should attracted to trans-women?

FWIW I will.

This is intersectionity in practice.
Understanding how an ideology will affect an autistic lesbian woman and challenging it.

Not virtue signaling about how good you are at throwing ageist ablist shade at 'terfs'

“
04/10/2018 14:30 pennydrew

“@traceyracer nobody here is obliged to get you up to speed. Read some threads and catch yourself up. In the meantime, don’t derail this thread.”

@pennydrew
Did you see the thread in Aibu about how to hide topics (meaning the FWR board)? If you want to take people with you on this issue wouldn’t it help to be more welcoming to those new to the debate and wanting to understand more about it? Unless you would also rather it didn’t appear in active convos so only people in the know can comment?

Justbackfromnewwine don’t take my comments out of context. If someone enters a thread that has been going for some time and then asks a question that’s been answered repeatedly earlier in the thread, yes they do need to be told not to expect the same people to repeat themselves! Don’t tell me to spend even more emotional labour on people who have not read a single word of the conversation they’ve inserted themselves to.

Justbackfromnewwine In fact, you’re not on this thread either but what, you’re just popping in to tell me to spend more emotional labour helping someone else understand a conversation they haven’t bothered to read? 🙄 do it yourself

It might be good to have a summary ‘entry level’ thread pinned in the board or something, that people can be politely directed to.
I’ve been reading the thread with interest but it’s just frustrating to see someone coming on and being given that sort of response which is surely counter productive to what is trying to be achieved. Surely it’s good for new people to come along and ask questions and engage.

I don’t feel qualified to summarise myself as I’m just getting my head round it all!

If the question is genuine people are directed to threads which covers the basics. But people that enter the conversation with, ‘ this all sounds really transphobic, what is the problem with this charity?’ will not.

Justbackfromnewwine I think if it hadn’t already been explained on this thread you would have a point and I do get what you mean about it feeling a bit intimidating to a newcomer (I felt the same).

But equally there is a pattern of trolls coming on to the boards and demanding it all be spoon fed to them and then being incredibly offensive and deliberately misogynistic and disablist. I think pennydrew was quite right in the context of her comment, because the person demanding to be explained to hadn’t made any effort to read the thread.

Here’s the comment I responded to, that you intentionally did not include’

*what did Mermaids or Stonewall do?

I've seen Stonewall mentioned a lot on this board why are you all hating on an LGBT charity?*

Sorry but wtf are you doing having a go at me for not spending time on a loaded question like that?

THIS IS ABOUT AUTISM. We had already covered what the issue with mermaids was. The person had already been given links. Ffs.

If you’re not clued up on the subject yourself, you have no right to ask other people to spend more time than they already have explaining things and repeating themselves. Similarly for those not involved in autism, you will not get or understand the concern from a thread

What kind of mindset trolls autistic people?

God help us, bring on the day where malignant personality disordered people can be blocked from causing harm.

Healthy debate is always a positive. And everyone is entitled to their opinions. I, personally, fell a little uneasy with some of the vitriol thrown at members of the trans community, talks of predators and talons, but that is the insecurity of many people who feel, strangely, that their role in the world is being undermined. We all have all roles in the world. We are now living in a different era to what we were used to when we were children, and that can be positive. Evolution within us and our societies is making us androgynous, and that can be only a positive in destroying the patriarchy. Don't feel threatened by the transgender community. Embrace them, for they are becoming an integral part of our society.

Ok, I can see patience could wear thin if there are lots of deliberately goady posts.
And thank you for the link.
The views about ‘transphobia’ etc are so (concerningly) mainstream that maybe sometimes questions might seem goady when perhaps they’re not. Hope that makes sense.

No one has bullied NAS to get them to change their policy.
No one has thrown vitriol at the trans community.
Stop telling lies.
I also reiterate my previous point about fucking off. As a matter of priority.

Yes, but that does not mean that Mermaids, and their ability to help autistic children and their families should not be questioned. There have been plenty of charities in the past (Kids Company, say) that should have been questioned.

That is the issue. Nothing more.

What problem do you have with this? NAS are researching. They will make up their own minds.

The transgender community does not represent me, it does not represent transexuals around me and it does not represent my autism.

It represents a patriarch.

Why post about trans on an autistic thread?

Autistic people rightly want to research a children's charity for safeguarding reasons. Not even is about trans, me me me me, trans.