Is a foot a hand?

[AliveWithTheSoundOfMusic]

It seems body parts and biology are all mixed up now.

My hands ID as feet actually.

My hand is a foot. Don’t mis-limb me.

I never played the piano with my feet, but I tried to one time as a joke.

It didn't work out so well.

Is an arse an elbow?

If my hand is 12 inches long, is it a foot?

My hands wear socks as performative feet.

Well the only thing a hand needs to be a foot is a sock, therefore if I wear socks on my hands it is a foot.

The thing on the end of my leg is 9 inches long which is 3/4 of a foot.

Does that mean that I have 3/4 x 5 = 15/4 = 3.75 toes?

Well some people do seem to have arses where their heads should be, whether they ID it as such themselves or not

Some people can use their feet like hands but they are still of course, feet.

Is an arse an elbow?

I dont know doctor...i cant tell

I know whether an arse is an elbow but I'm forbidden to share my wisdom on pain of banishment.

All that effort I put into revising for my GCSE biology when I could have just painted it in sunshine, flowers and happy happy internet vibes and made it up as I went along!

If humans have 8 fingers and two thumbs why don't we have eight toes and two something else?

Oh no suddenly I'm a bigot some humans have different numbers of fingers and thumbs and some don't have toes and now I've offended people with literal violence.

doctor

Oh

I thought maybe it was a hippocratic oath thingie

I'm the PhD type of doctor. I do believe in First Do No Harm, though.

If humans have 8 fingers and two thumbs why don't we have eight toes and two something else

DD calls them "thumb toes" - hard to argue with her on that!

Glory!
“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.”
“The question is,” said Alice, “whether you can make words mean so many different things.”
“The question is,” said Humpty Dumpty, “which is to be master—that’s all.”