Dark and stormies all round! Bluestocking piss up

[QuentinSummers]

A friendly place for feminist or general chit chat. Welcome all!

Floral
egregious logic fail slapping me in the chops

Mmm cheese.

I just had a large mcds meal with chocolate milkshake, and now I feel a bit sick... 🤢

I often come in the pub to check ideas so it's my round.

OK. Now that everyone has their drinks, I was wondering if there is a specific word for hating mothers. I ask because atm it seems to me that the current activism really has a problem with women who have used their wombs to gestate and their breasts to feed. I can't help thinking that there is an extent to which the aim is not only to erase us cunty types but replace us.

I have been worrying about this for a while.

Last night I dreamt that Matthew Wright turned up at home a d work to see if he could find any "hate speech" on my computers. You know how it is with dreams when you can't figure something out....it was only when I was telling DSis today and she said "He is not someone who'd do that" that I realised it was doubly weird, first for the concept and secondly for the person. Apologies to Matthew if he is reading

As for terminology, childfree women are hated too. I'd just stick with misogyny.

Is it because our bodies have been used for reproduction and not just sex? We are a reminder that our bodies are like they are because of the needs of the children we give birth to. Lots of features that are considered desirable and attractive are indications of fertility.

I also think that mothers are an easy target. As soon as I conceived I received a certain amount of criticism and felt a pressure that I wasn't doing everything right, and I still feel it now. Anyone feels they have the right to criticise mothers, especially those with no experience. It's just another group piling in.

I don't know what the word is, I hope it's a good one.

Sorry, xpost with LighthouseSouth. You're right, it is just misogyny.

I'm just drinking tea if that's okay.

I can't find a name for it but if there isn't one there needs to be. Its hatred of what they cant have/buy/control; recognition of the fact that for many women motherhood is an intellectual awakening (hence the need to continually press the lie that pregnancy makes you daft); and fear that every generation has a reset button - in the form of childcare and the words we whisper in the ears of our offspring. They can build whatever they want, establish any kind of society, we can sweep it away by the way we raise our children - that is mega power. The only brake they have is the doubt they sow in our minds about this fact.

It is a question of style and degree, I think, rather than substance. The substance is misogyny.

Some snacks to get you thirsty

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jun/23/how-to-turn-potato-peel-into-crisps

Mothers are more liable to put the needs of children before the needs of men. Mothers are people who get to speak with authority to males (even if only their own offspring). Mothers are the reality of sex rather than a male fantasy woman.

Errol

That's right! I forgot that in my analysis. Thats why pregnancy is the most dangerous time for a woman regarding dv. My partner was 'lovely' until I had a child and stopped centering him. Of course he wasnt being lovely. It was me being in denial.

Perhaps also because many of us are needed to continue the human race but technically just a few of them. As the default carers we perform roles beyond reproduction. They are so easily rendered superfluous. This may or may not just be waffle!

I've always thought men prefer women to be mothers because men feel it increases or creates women's dependence on them

This may be a key difference in the current battle. Mostly I think of misogyny as same old same old, but perhaps there is a new aspect. And now childfree women might be told even more "you're not really a woman if you don't want children" in the same way that some men might say "you're not really a woman if you never wear dresses".

What a time to be alive. I think another vodka is in order.

Hello everyone
First timer and wanted to see what you are all up to.
Drinking whisky I see, so I'd thought I'd partake in a drop myself.

About mothers, I wonder if the misogyny stems from the premise of 'mummy's baby, daddy's maybe'. Because a man never really knows for sure. That gives us a lot of power. Its never spoken about because we don't want to upset our partners either.

Seeing pictures of the archeological remains of the earliest towns in Turkey, Catal Hoyek, (not sure of the spelling) seemed to show a reflection of today's urban living.

There were lots of small square rooms that were inhabited by animals and family, apparently. My gut instinct made me think of animal pens and captivity for...women and their babies.
Not a million miles from being stuck indoors with a baby these days.

These are some really good points.

However, many gay guys display extreme misogyny too. What is the root of that? I am not merely saying sex preference but actual expressed disgust.

Because a man never really knows for sure

Isnt that one of the reasons why some babies look exactly like their fathers? Well in some cases

When Jerry Springer first arrived in this country i watched him a lot (maternity leave and by god id never seen anything like his shows!!) and one of my favourite types of episodes were when a man was disputing paternity and they put a picture of the babys face next to his and you were all like 'maaattte!! No way is that child NOT yours'

Rufus
Apparently most DNA paternity tests are initiated by men. Don't where I heard that though.
Back in the day women could pull that one off a lot easier, or maybe they didn't know for sure themselves.
But they would have known the baby was theirs, so no problem.

Apparently most DNA paternity tests are initiated by men.

Well that would be fairly obvious...as you say the woman would be fairly positive the child was theirs

I think that was pretty much the reason for my freinds marriage breakup...he demanded a dna test

Dumbass...kid was the fucking image of him

(To be fair there must have been problems for him to ask for a test...but it was deffo the nail in the coffin)

Norther
Gay guys displaying extreme mysogyny
Their sexual appetite?
Where their lifestyle remains at rampant adolescence stage? So having children is abhorrent to them?
Seems a bit reminiscent of how I felt as teenager, anybody over 30 is so old and over the hill.
I am generalising of course. And rambling.
Nagalt, nagalt, nagalt.

Rufus
It must be really weird to not know for sure.
Lying awake at night, wondering
I guess we'll never know that feeling eh?
Shame
At least that's one thing less for us to worry about.

I dunno science

Wouldnt surprise me if dd was swapped at birth

Hospitals cannot be trusted.

Absolutely thebewilderness

Accidents have happened in the past but to be fair uk hospitals do seem a bit more on the ball

lol
I know that feeling, mine have grown now. But back then,
sometimes just sometimes...it seemed they weren't from MY dna thankyou
I suppose there could be a small chance of a swap but it's not on my radar at all...Until they were teenagers