I read this interesting article:
jezebel.com/dead-girls-and-our-sweet-quiet-boys-1826193367
It's about the recent school shooting in America and how the shooter was actually a "sweet shy boy". It's obviously completely distasteful for his family to have said this given their "sweet" boy just murdered 10 people but the article also talks about how he was rejected by a girl at school. One news report said this rejection was the reason for the shooting. These type of justifications seek to blame girls and women for men's violence towards them.
In domestic abuse cases, the common question is "Why didn't she leave?"putting the emphasis on her to end the relationship not on him to stop being abusive. We don't hear "Why did he do it?"anywhere near as regularly.
I think this is just the tip of a deeply misogynistic iceberg but wanted to see what your thoughts are