Big little lies

[cookiecakez]

Anyone else love this show? What do feminists think?

Love the way it showed the women and children at the end.

Chilling domestic violence scenes that were terrifying but showed the multifaceted way women are trapped in and the risks they face in leaving violence partners.

I went out and read the book and loved the women coming together.

Brilliant actors - made me think that Reese Witherspoon and Nicole Kidman are truly empowered as producers which i don't think would have been possible a generation ago.

What do others think?

Agree and by the third and fourth you're into it.

I would also say download and watch all at once, it's better that way.

Bluntness100

Hell yeah. Don't even start unless you can binge.

There was great attention to the details of the relationships, little things like how Perrys persona changed when the nanny walked into the room or how he changed when the boys came in, rather then him just being this big bad person. I think it helped highlight how people like that have several different masks which makes it harder for the victim to feel they will be believed.

I did feel that they should have mentioned Bonnie's abuse at some point as it would have made more sense about how she picks up on the situation and then why she flipped at the end and pushed him.

I wanted to like it. I really did.

But - and this is not really through a feminist lens - I found it incredibly boring. There were episodes where nothing much happened.

And Reese Witherspoon's character was very unsettling. I don't want all my protagonists to be Little Women perfect. But she was incredibly flawed and I could. It warm to her. The only thing I sympathised with was her love / hate feelings for her ex. But not the meddling, the judginess, the affair, the horrible treatment of her husband.

And the soundtrack. I am willing to accept I am in a minority of one as the soundtrack is available on iTunes so people obviously love the music but I hated it and it nearly spoilt the whole Programme for me.

Grey - that's funny, I saw the first 2 minutes and thought "what the hell music is this?"!!

I loved it, I thought the portrayal of Perry's violence and Celeste's reaction to it was utterly true to life

Apparently there is more explaination as to why the killer (don't want to spoil to those who haven't seen it yet) did it, in the book. Their background isn't explained in the series and I think it should have been.

wherearewenow yes I really loved the book

There is one little bit of the book that stuck with me re the violence - the baby sitter for Celeste notices a bruise and Celeste explains it away due to a tennis injury and the baby sitter says it is time to find another tennis partner - and Celeste says it was her fault and the baby sitter says she bets it wasn't her fault.

The show did not do a good job of explaining buy the murderer murdered the murderee. The only thing I can think of is that the murderer had been considered an annoyance by one of the main characters and so by murdering, they proved themselves to be a good egg. Bit woolly for my liking. And I am trying to avoid spoilers for those who have not seen it.

I thought Celeste's taking on responsibility for the violence in the relationship was superbly done- it's passion, I provoke him, I hurt him too, I enjoy it.

Also the way shock and trauma were captured in the silent flashbacks all through it.

And the choice of murderer was exquisite- the person with the greatest balance, respect for harmony and ecology and so on. Possibly the one who would find it hardest to accept what they had done.

BrieAndChilli

That aspect of Bonnie wasn't brought out in the show at all. I hadn't realised.

I haven't seen all of them yet, but ruined it for myself as usual by looking at the episodes on Wikipedia.

I thought the complex way the dv was tackled was great. I. That 1st therapist appointment when he is the one that admits to hitting her was amazing. It really made you think yeah I can see why she stays and thinks he can change because he seems so vunerable.

Though all the sex with Celeste and perry was a bit too much for me. It kind of felt like on the one hand it was saying 'DV is horrible' and on the other hand 'this is the good stuff though isn't it? This is the stuff you wanna see.' It felt too uncomfortable for me.

"Though all the sex with Celeste and perry was a bit too much for me. " this was uncomfortable, wasn't it? They set this couple up in the opening ep as being the passionate, hot couple that everyone still wants to be. The pair of them are just so physically beautiful and they have this magical house with the incredible sea view. you feel drawn into it all as if the glamour could actually win. And the therapist has to work so hard to get Celeste to understand the reality of her situation.

Celeste's being angry with the therapist for 'saying these things to me'.

Antigrinch I think the show did not go far enough to show that it was just a veneer. The sex scenes were shown to be "hot" and that was a mistake, I think. Was I the only one who did not guess t he twist about paternity?

I agree that bonnie could have been explored more in the tv show.

I was thinking that the typical ending would have been for Celeste to lose her life or have to spend her life fighting for custody so I was really glad with the to ending where women come together and support each other.

But you can have hot sex in an abusive relationship. It doesn't stop it being abuse. It is a more complicated story though

I don't disagree that hot sex is possible in an abusive relationship, only that it was rather voyeuristic to show the hot sex in a way which was very glam, very sexy. It made me uncomfortable and not in a good way.

Yeah I suppose so AntiGrinch. I just have a problem with tv sex sometimes. People are always up against a wall or on the furniture, there is no fore play and always the simultaneous orgasms. It looks difficult . I guess I'd like to see some 'vanilla' sex portrayed sometimes too.

Yes, extraordinaire that's what I should've said.

I have just read a Marie Claire article from an expert from refuge re big little lies and there domestic violence - I can't seem to post the link but it is well worth a read.

does this work

No it doesn't work but it was an article in MC which gave a good explanation of the relationship and issues with the charming man syndrome.

Perry can change and charm others and Celeste almost wants to believe he is good because she has been isolated and it must be awful to have the person you are closest too and love abuse you

No it doesn't work but it was an article in MC which gave a good explanation of the relationship and issues with the charming man syndrome.

Perry can change and charm others and Celeste almost wants to believe he is good because she has been isolated and it must be awful to have the person you are closest too and love abuse you

I didn't see it as hot sex, it started off as rape and I feel she faked it half the time just to appease him. I don't think it was supposed to be seen as hot but rather as another way of him abusing her.

And her desperately holding on to it as proof that he loved her as he was havin sex with her. It took her a while to see it was just his way of controlling her