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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Some guy masturbated at me and my child in the park

18 replies

LauraPalmersBodybag · 21/02/2017 20:20

...just that really.

It was violating and I suddenly feel a lot less safe. It was in the middle of the afternoon and in broad daylight.

I immediately called the police and reported it, then gave a statement. They came back to me a few hours later and said that the incident and description of the man matched with something from a few weeks ago. I was then shown 12 photos and asked if I could find the man I saw...the person I thought it might have been wasn't the person previously arrested. I had an initial hunch but it was so hard to tell. I now feel like I failed...

What a horrible horrible thing. I'm really shaken up and angry as I feel that I can't use my local park now.

OP posts:
Original poster
LauraPalmersBodybag · 21/02/2017 20:22

I'd like to add that my dd is only 1 and was asleep with the buggy tipped back so didn't see anything. But from his perspective, he wanked at a mother pushing a buggy.

OP posts:
AndnoneforGretchenWeinersBye · 21/02/2017 20:26

What a horrible thing to experience. This has happened to me twice, but once was as a 10 year old. It was reported and the police were great, but the "flasher" (hate that term, sounds like something from a Carry On movie when in reality it's much more sinister) wasn't caught that I know of. You haven't failed at anything - it's just shit that it happened. I hope the Police catch the bastard and you can move on from it. Really glad your little one was asleep.

Crunchyside · 21/02/2017 20:27

Wow, what a disgusting scumbag. Sorry I don't have any suggestions. I don't think you should stop going to the park though, as long as there are plenty of other people around.

LapinR0se · 21/02/2017 20:27

What a disgusting person. You did absolutely the right thing to report him Flowers

CaoNiMa · 21/02/2017 20:57

Despicable. So sorry this happened to you.

JustSpeakSense · 21/02/2017 22:09

This is a horrible thing to happen to you, It happened to me when I was a teenager, and when relating the story to a group of friends I was shocked that similar incidents had happened to quite a few of them when they were younger, it's shocking.

I think that with internet these days weirdos have the ability to expose themselves online and less if this happens in parks etc. Like it used to.

Perhaps your 'flasher' is not very computer literate.

KERALA1 · 21/02/2017 22:13

Eww horrible. Happened to me twice as a young teen. Bloody weirdo pervs

Xenophile · 21/02/2017 22:20

I'm really sorry this happened to you.

It's not too surprising that you couldn't pick out the "right" person from photographs, humans are really bad at remembering details and eye witness testimony is notoriously crap.

I hope you know you did nothing wrong.

peaceloveandbiscuits · 21/02/2017 22:25

So sorry this happened to you - what a horrible man.

I just wanted to empathise on picking the wrong person from a line up. I had to do it when I was attacked on a train but none of the men in the photos looked like him. You haven't failed, it's extremely difficult.

I hope you're on the mend and feeling better. Don't be afraid of going to the park, it belongs to you as much as anyone else.

Original poster
LauraPalmersBodybag · 21/02/2017 23:53

Thank you all. I've been feeling really shaken by it...the bit of the park that we were in was completely quiet when it happened. I live in a fairly large city and the parks are big and meandering, but until now always seemed very safe in the daytime.

I've read about how unreliable line up stuff can be...I even had it in my head at the time. I guess I was just hopping I could 'get it right' and that would lead to the police catching him - optimistic and idealistic I know!

I never realised how horrible something like this could be until it happened. Guess it's just surprised me.

Thanks again and I'm sorry to hear that many of you have gone through the same. It's disgusting that we should have to encounter this.

OP posts:
LynneJones · 22/02/2017 10:39

Absolutely disgusting. I hope this t@sser gets caught and locked up. I cant believe he did this in broad daylights yukkk

Deathraystare · 22/02/2017 10:54

He's lucky you didn't take a photo to show the police.

justagirl484 · 24/02/2017 06:31

JustSpeakSense it is sad that it happens so often. I think nearly all of us women have been subjected to sexual assault in some form Sad. When I was a kid in the 80s paedophilia and CSA were seen as something taboo and very sinister but I know very few people who didn't experience it in some form or other. It is a disgrace that so much of it still goes on.

OP, Cake and a glass of Wine

justagirl484 · 24/02/2017 06:32

DeathrayStare I agree. Disgusting perv....Angry

BlackMirror · 24/02/2017 06:38

Sorry this happened to you Flowers

The first time I saw a penis in real life was a guy wanking and me and my school friends walking to school through some flats. I was about 13. Awful experience.

HelenDenver · 24/02/2017 07:53

Sorry this happened Flowers

OneFlewOverTheDodosNest · 24/02/2017 12:29

I'm so sorry that happened to you OP - happened to me and my sister too when we were younger and I imagine lots of other women. It's so violating isn't it?

A PP said that the internet is probably decreasing the incidence but unfortunately I think these creeps like to upset women when out and about.

peaceloveandbiscuits · 24/02/2017 18:51

I agree, unfortunately I think the driving force behind it is to upset unsuspecting women. Bloody weirdos.

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