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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Not all women

155 replies

phoolani · 31/01/2017 23:43

Reading yet another feminism thread that didn't hit double figures replies before someone interjected with 'notallmen...' And the original post didn't even talk about all men, just about 'so many men...'
Have you ever seen an opposite example? Of men interjecting a 'notallwomen' in anything disparaging women as a whole?
I had a quick Google and came back with nothing.

OP posts:
YetAnotherSpartacus · 31/01/2017 23:48

Not answering your question, but I've had it up to my tits what with the male trolls, mansplainers and needy little boys making it all about them on FWR.

... Although re-reading above you seem to be considering a situation where a woman jumped in to defend men???

DJKKSlider · 31/01/2017 23:51

What does FWR stand for?

venusinscorpio · 31/01/2017 23:52

This board used to be called "Feminism and Women's Rights"

DJKKSlider · 31/01/2017 23:53

I see. Thanks. Smile

Original poster
phoolani · 31/01/2017 23:54

No, more where a man jumps in to defend women, as in, no, not all women are like that, why can't you just say you hate one woman and accept that the others are lovely Angels straight from heaven? And yes, most nagging people are women, but most women aren't naggers, I know several women who never nag...
More that.

OP posts:
Original poster
phoolani · 31/01/2017 23:55

Erm, tho yes, my initial thought was that there is always a woman who jumps in to point out that NOT ALL MEN...

OP posts:
VestalVirgin · 31/01/2017 23:58

I cannot recall ever having heard such a thing said, no.

When men say shit about women, other men do NOT jump in to say "But my daughter is not like that!!!!" the way women do on here whenever one suggests that, perhaps, boys should not be in the girls' changing room.

I have also not noticed any defense of wives or sisters or grandmothers.

The only instance where I have heard men say "not all women" was when I said "you know, women do not like this shit". Then, there's always this or that friend who does not mind their horrid behaviour at all.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 01/02/2017 00:04

The only instance where I have heard men say "not all women" was when I said "you know, women do not like this shit". Then, there's always this or that friend who does not mind their horrid behaviour at all

Yes, I was thinking exactly that!

Original poster
phoolani · 01/02/2017 00:04

Yes, vestal, that's what I'm talking about!
im noticing this more and more. not as in, it's happening more and more, but as in, it's starting to piss me off more and more.

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venusinscorpio · 01/02/2017 00:06

YY, definitely, Spartacus and Vestal.

OneWithTheForce · 01/02/2017 00:13

The only place I have seen something (not those exact words but the same idea) like what you ask is in a FB group I'm in. It's called the science enthusiasts but it isn't just about science (despite the admins' pleas) and on the whole I have been pretty impressed to find a group where the men (women do too obv) are challenging sexist/misogynist crap when it is spouted in there. Thankfully it is rarely spouted but when it is it's really refreshing to see people shut it down. I find myself feeling really comfortable in that group.

vesuvia · 01/02/2017 00:28

Some men say "not all prostitutes are trafficked" but those men are not defending women, they are defending men's entitlement to prostitutes.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 01/02/2017 00:34

Yes, along with

  • some women like doing all the domestic labour (not all women complain about unequal shares in domestic labour)!
  • some women really get off on porn (not all women find porn oppressive)!
  • not all women are feminists (some women suck dick behave as I want them too, subservient to me).
caroldecker · 01/02/2017 00:42

Not all the people posting on here with a female posting name are women.

Original poster
phoolani · 01/02/2017 00:44

I accept that's true, carol. But I can't think that all of the notallmen brigade are men.

OP posts:
venusinscorpio · 01/02/2017 01:05

Vesuvia

They claim to be defending women although as you say that's obviously bullshit and spout the same arguments as self proclaimed "sex positive" liberal feminists do though.

venusinscorpio · 01/02/2017 01:07

i.e. about "choice", "empowerment" and "agency"

ICJump · 01/02/2017 04:46

Interesting I was trying to think of a way to use not all women but I. A very different context.

I saw a quote which said "the benefits men accure from women's labour varies according to class, but all men have privileges over women". I wanted to flip it a bit to something about not all women having the benefit of trans people's labour. As a way to illustrate that women remain an oppressed class

Xenophile · 01/02/2017 07:22

Or you get someone with a fairly obviously tenuous idea of how most of female humanity lives and is treated constantly whiffling on about how they have never experienced X, so therefore X isn't the universal experience of all women and we no longer need to discuss it.

Or there is a discussion along the lines of "women are expected to do..." and someone states that they've never been expected to do it, which becomes to them no women are expected to do it.

It's almost as if these people are incapable of critical, or indeed any, thought.

CharlieSierra · 01/02/2017 07:44

Totally agree with those saying the only time men say is is when they are defending their own entitlement. It almost annoys me more when it comes from sex positive libfems, I find them totally devoid of critical thought to the point of brainwashing.
And 100% this:
Not answering your question, but I've had it up to my tits what with the male trolls, mansplainers and needy little boys making it all about them on FWR

DeviTheGaelet · 01/02/2017 07:48

yet you are on fire the last couple of days
Wish buffy was here. We need a feminist roar. Might start one later

WhisperingLoudly · 01/02/2017 07:56

Nope never seen it unless it's in context of protecting their right to be arseholes (e.g not all women are trafficked)

Men rarely acknowledge that women are even people let alone individuals: we're their wives; their mothers; their daughters; their sisters. Always portrayed as a male appendage to encourage them not to treat us like shit Angry

JosefK · 01/02/2017 08:20

To be fair, feminists are sometimes guilty of making homogenising statements about women themselves. As in, 'women are more caring, nurturing, and co-operative than men.'

Any deindividuation of people into monolithic classes is a bit questionable.

As a man I can only try and convince you that I genuinely do find such a statement as 'women get so over-emotional' offensive and would definitely respond with 'not all women'. But that does mean statements such as 'men are violent' equally problematic. You can't have it one way and not the other.

cadnowyllt · 01/02/2017 08:20

Men rarely acknowledge that women are even people let alone individuals: we're their wives; their mothers; their daughters; their sisters. Always portrayed as a male appendage to encourage them not to treat us like shit

Ok, some of the changes will be easy enough; for 'wife', I could say, the woman whom married me. For 'mother', the woman whom gave birth to me.

'Sister' might be a bit more of a mouthful. Maybe, the woman whom I share the woman whom give birth to us. Golly, I can't see that catching on.

DeviTheGaelet · 01/02/2017 08:30

It's not all about you cadno
It's about the news articles who describe women as "x's wife" Without even mentioning her name. Even when he just murdered her and her entire family.
It's infuriating

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