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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

finally did a feminist thing...

30 replies

IceBeing · 05/02/2015 16:35

...why do I feel so shaky?

I asked a salesperson who was visiting our physics department to take down a overtly sexualized image of a woman that was part of the advertising. I explained we were trying to counteract unhelpful/damaging gender stereotypes in the physics department in order to increase our retention of female students.

He just said, "oh yeah no problem - it isn't my material" and did it.

So why do I feel like I have been in a fight?

OP posts:
LadyRainicorn · 05/02/2015 16:37

Adrenaline. That's a side effect.

But well done.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 05/02/2015 17:14

Well done!
I love that it was so easy and he wasn't even invested in the material himself. Just goes to show that even though many bits of feminist activism are like banging your head against a brick wall, sometimes it's pushing at an open door. Smile

FuckOffGroundhog · 05/02/2015 18:07

So why do I feel like I have been in a fight?

Because you were expecting one! Good for you though :)

DeliciousIrony · 05/02/2015 18:42

Exactly, because you were geared up for a debate - well done!

BertieBotts · 05/02/2015 18:45

That always happens to me too - it's normal :) It gets easier. Well done you!

TeiTetua · 05/02/2015 20:17

Part of living in a society involves learning not to make public protests against things that most people take for granted--sexism in pretty much every form being a major item. Well, most people would at least give a token agreement that rape is a bad thing, but that's about the limit! So if you step out of line with something that's likely to make you noticed as the non-conformist, it's an adrenaline-pumping incident. But yes, if you do it a few times, you either realise you aren't likely to get bruised, or you get used to bruises.

BuffyBotRebooted · 05/02/2015 20:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
IceBeing · 05/02/2015 20:40

Oh! I just heard that some students actually noticed it had been removed and were pleased.

At least now somebody knows we are trying to do something, no matter how small, to improve things.

Even though he removed it, I still gave hime a 5 minute lecture on why these things matter... Blush

As you say, I was geared for a fight!

OP posts:
Original poster
IceBeing · 05/02/2015 20:43

What disappointed me was that the chair of our diversity and equality committee was sitting facing the display, didn't apparently notice the problem, didn't make any move to address the issue once I raised it, and when I moved to go and speak to the guy, jumped up out of his chair and practically ran out of the room.

I didn't exactly feel backed up.

It is a shame because (unfortunately) the message is stronger coming from a bloke.

OP posts:
EBearhug · 05/02/2015 21:07

Are you going to mention it to the chair of the diversity and equality committee, because it sounds like he might not be the best person for that job?

Well done for asking them to remove it.

Original poster
IceBeing · 05/02/2015 22:15

Definitely not the best person....but no amount of pointing this out has gotten me (or anyone else) anywhere.

Every time he speaks to the department he frames it in terms of "sorry to waste all your time, but we have to report etc....."

anyway...

OP posts:
Original poster
IceBeing · 06/02/2015 12:26

I have gone totally militant over night. Just emailed the company to suggest they update their marketing strategy to something less sexist.

I am sure they will be listening keenly Grin

OP posts:
LightningOnlyStrikesOnce · 06/02/2015 12:33

Congratulations!

antimatter · 06/02/2015 12:40

Congrats! It gets easier every time you would stand up to sexism.
(speaking from experience Grin )

Wellwellwell3holesintheground · 06/02/2015 12:51

DD (11) rang Nestle yesterday to complain about the 'man fuel for man jobs' slogan on her Yorkie. She used phrases like 'speaking as a feminist' and 'surely we have moved on from this'. Just got to work on her ethical chocolate buying now Grin

Well done OP.

BathtimeFunkster · 06/02/2015 12:55

Wellwell - I will be so proud if my DD ever does that.

She sounds fab! :)

I feel hope for the future just hearing about her.

Well done, IceBeing.

Sorry your chair of diversity is such a useless prick.

Wellwellwell3holesintheground · 06/02/2015 13:00

Bathtime - she is ringing McCoys later. She said, 'In the interests of equality, I should ring them too - their 'man crisps' rubbish really annoys me'.

Nestle told her that Yorkies were traditionally seen as a man's chocolate bar Hmm

She is utterly fantastic. Both DS1 and DS2 are feminists too. And if you think her phone skills are good you should see her on a rugby pitch...

ZeroFunDame · 06/02/2015 13:04

Well done!

And surely the shakiness was some sort of precognition of the difference you've made in the world. In addition to the good you've done in your own institution something will have clicked in the salesperson's head. It may take a while but he'll notice things more now.

Original poster
IceBeing · 06/02/2015 20:25

wellwell that's just brilliant! See if my parents had started me that young, I wouldn't be finding it so difficult now!

Must remember to get DD on the case when she is a bit older (currently 3yo).

Although I took her swimming a year a go and she got some flak from a 4 yo over the fact she was wearing both blue and pink, and how this made it hard to tell whether she was a girl or not. DD just kept asking her why girls had to wear pink over and over and over and over....till eventually the 4 yo said well maybe they don't...I guess...you aren't! To which DD replied I like octopus. and the conversation moved on.

Sorry that anecdote seemed more interesting in my head.

OP posts:
NormaStanleyFletcher · 07/02/2015 16:59

I like that anecdote.

Wellwellwell3holesintheground · 07/02/2015 18:22

I like it too!

UptoapointLordCopper · 07/02/2015 19:05

Well done IceBeing!

And well done wellwellwell and DD.

And well done Ice's DD.

Smile
SkaterGrrrrl · 10/02/2015 16:18

Well done OP.

chocoluvva · 17/02/2015 12:55

Well done from me too. Smile

When I was a young woman I never dared openly speak out about unhelpful representations of/attitudes to women as I thought my motivation for disliking them might be partly due to being jealous of attractive women. Sad Shock

Then to my shame I seemed to forget about the feminist cause while my DC were little and I was a SAHM. The old-fashioned role of SAHM mum suited me (for various reasons). And DD and I enjoyed her 'girly' clothes Hmm .

I regret this now, and regularly tell DD and DS about feminist causes, campaigns etc but it's hard when they are teenagers embarrassed by nearly everything.... So I'm very grateful to you for not only being a thoughtful parent but actively taking a stand.

Original poster
IceBeing · 17/02/2015 14:12

So I haven't heard back from the company at all....is it worth phoning them or anything?

Maybe I could fake being interested in their product and get their attention that way?

OP posts: