What's your number 1 feminist ishoo?

[ladyblablah]

I know there are so many, but which is the one that gets your goat

Mine is women wasting their lives, careers, self esteem and potential in shit marriages with shit men.

violence against women and girls

It's true, there are so many that its very hard to narrow it down to just one

Two very good examples given so far

I guess mine would be rape culture - the widespread belief that all women and girls are 'up for it' all the time, that a woman can be blamed for an attack on her because she was wearing X/drinking X/flirting/walking alone/whatever, the belief that all women and girls exist for men's viewing pleasure, the belief that women are just not fully human. This affects every single woman and girl in some way and its so prevalent - its deeply frightening.

Pornography - ruins lives, dehumanises, increases violence, lowers self esteem, filters through to young teenage women in fashion/behaviour and sex, increases hatred toward women in ordinary men.

It's the BIGGEST industry and it hates women.

I think it's the number one threat to females.

And before some eejit comes on and says it helps their relationship or some crap can I remind you that this is the Feminism topic and I don't come on the average topic and say this - just here, just here do I say it's the number one threat to women.

Women being in abusive situations, particularly marriage/intimate relationships.

I think probably rape culture, which feeds in to sexual violence against women and girls, pornography and prostitution because all of those things depend on society seeing women and girls as constantly available for sex because they aren't really human.

There was a section on WH this morning about Yewtree and Saville, about why women didn't report, and why those who did weren't believed. One of the quotes which gave me the rage was, "Saville's lawyers will make mincemeat out of you if you proceed".

There's a thread about prostitution at the moment, which I can't comment on because we're not supposed to be cross and agrue and I can't think of a nice response to women who say that those 'other' women can be used as wank socks by misogynist men because 'agency'.

800 women a day die from pregnancy.

Agree Puffins - I can't bear apologists for prostitution who bang on about how its a woman's 'choice' and 'the money's good' and assorted other complete and utter nonsense. And yes it's always 'other women' - never themselves, or their daughter, or friend, or wife, or partner. It makes me think they either must be a) a bit dim or b) have not a single little clue about the reality of life for the vast majority of people working as prostitutes.

For me it's the fact sexism is not seen as serious vs racism, for example. So Saudi Arabia is not treated as apartheid South Africa was, and sexist slurs are explained away where racist ones would not be tolerated. Or for example the golf open being held at a club that doesn't admit women members - imagine if it didn't admit black people.

We need to see sexism as being a serious problem and not some women overreacting to properly get I grips with it, I think

Double standards

They're all related, aren't they? I (try to) see all issues through a feminist prism. Even if I saw the benefit of arranging them into a hierarchy — which I don't — I wouldn't be able to isolate one from another.

On a practical level, I guess I devote the most time to trying to support women and building up their (including my own) self-esteem. That's both a feminist issue — women have lower self-esteem because of inequality and negative gender roles — and not only a feminist issue, since it also affects boys and men, and is clearly intersectional with regard to disabilities, race, class and sexualities. It's my #1 issue simply because it has affected me personally, and I think I have developed skills that can help others.

right now?

the fact my DD doesn't get the full support her SEN would warrant if she were a DS (ASD related)

in terms of things that affect me personally, it's issues around women and food / eating behaviour

obviously VAWG affects me personally, but i have not been directly on the receiving end in as large a way as disordered eating etc

I don't know if it's the number 1 issue, and it's not so much an issue for me (I suspect it is an issue for me in an absolute sense but in a relative sense then I really can't complain) - the sex-based pay gap. Witholding economic power from women allows many of the other issues to happen and flourish.

Interesting that we all focus in different (ish) areas.

Guess we will collectively cover all the interlinked areas eventually and that's great.

Obviously I see all of the above as serious issues but the one thing I get so livid about is the way women are portrayed in music videos and popular media.

The attitude that women are nothing more than sex objects and that all women should aspire to be as made up and scantily dressed as possible is what's directed to the young people of today.

A lot if the other issues are an extension of this.

it's true but i guess in reality actually a lot of the ones that others have mentioned besides our own come a very very close second

For me it is violence against women and girls, and the attitudes around it such as glamourisation, victim blaming and the reluctance to call out male violence for the massive problem it is in the way we would label it if it was another 'group' doing such killing. Recent example that has wound me up-the banker in Hong Kong who has been charged with the murder of two women. I have seen articles where they have been just called 'prostitutes' not women, it has been labelled a 'sex murder' and his ex fiance has been blamed for turning him bad by cheating on him and dumping him. Alongside all the scantily clad photos of these women. And no mention in these articles that it is yet another example of brutal male to female violence. If a religious extremist had killed someone it would be called the hate crime that it is and recognised as part of an ongoing problem, yet the prolific killings of women by men are never connected as part of a wider epidemic and always just treated as stand alone crimes.

Capitalism- because every other issue from pornography, unequal pay, dual exploitation of work and home, violence and inequality in the home, objectification of women...etc, all stem from this. The way in which capital relies upon a false division between the public and the private sphere allows liberals/politicians/men to deny too much. The idea that we all have free choice stems from this liberal philosophy that in the end is a form of ideology for capitalism.

'the fact my DD doesn't get the full support her SEN would warrant if she were a DS (ASD related)'

Jenny, can you say more about this?

bigkids, excellent point about Saudi Arabia. I think that most people understand racism and why it is wrong, and much progress is being made with homophobia too. Sexism often seems to be at the bottom of the pile and seen as a joke by many people.

Rape, domestic violence and intersectional feminism

Can I have two? In the UK, I think equal pay is the most important because we do live in a capitalist society and it disadvantages women in every aspect of life from accessing childcare to having the financial independence to leave abusive relationships (although I appreciate the emotional constraints are just, if not more, restrictive).

Overseas, it's the right of self-determination; the right not to be considered a chattel of your husband or family.

most people understand racism and why it is wrong

But it still exist and brutual to black women. The worst form of discrimination I have faced is because of my skin colour, followed by sex.

It's amazing how women who will never experience racism are quick to dismiss the impact race discrimination has over black women

Mine would be reproductive rights, specifically the disgraceful lack of them for women as close as Northern Ireland and the RoI, and the terrifying erosion of them in the US.

It makes me sad every day, Lotta

I know in the big scheme of everything feminist, it's not massive, that it's very selfish, but it's very real.

like i say, she has a dx of ASD.

she struggles with PE lessons and having heard her teacher ask 'is it a girl thing, you'd rather be drawing?' she now says this is the reason. Not because she struggles with transitions and sometimes getting dressed and that her co-ordination isn't always comparable to her peers.

she is being given the vocabulary to 'fit in' without her understanding what it means to be 'her'

does that make sense?

i'm really upset and angry about it today