Men have done such a number on us that even women don't even know what rape is

[cailindana]

Now I know Judy Finnegan is not a paragon of intellectual prowess.

But still, I would never have thought such stupidity could fall from her lips: www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-29598732

She said the rape was "not violent." So what was it then? Friendly? Enjoyable? Just a little game?

How how how how how do we live in a world where a woman can't recognise the extreme violence of having your body used by another person?

Cadno - although a defendant is entitled to stay silent and leave it entirely up to the prosecution to prove. (I think!)

Foolishlady - yes, when there is no other evidence, the prosecution is on a very sticky wicket trying to make out its case.

MyEmpire,

Wouldn't the law already recognise that consent given under duress or coercion was not valid?

Brighton - true, but the jury is told that it can ask itself, why when given the opportunity to to so, the defendant didn't share his version of events with the Police. And the defendant is told this too in the arresting caution - "if you fail now to mention anything you later rely on in evidence, adverse inferences may be made against you."

The 'No comment' interview is the resort of the guilty.

I guess I have a problem with the idea that any of the three thing's you've listed somehow make what a woman says invalid - and they are all seem very subjective.

If a man threatens to end a relationship because he feels his sexual needs are not met, and a woman consents to sex she would not have otherwise consented to in an effort to making the relationship work then is he raping her? That is emotional pressure isn't it?

Fair enough - but as with most things in life it is the final answer that counts.

Brighton - In that circumstance, I think I'd recommend the dude getting out of there - move on.

My Empire -

1. A man who is in a relationship with someone who has a lower sex drive than him. It's not realistic to think everyone in a relationship is compatible sexually all of the time with out any kind of dialogue.

2. Because you were under duress by the sound of what you've described - that must have been horrible.

How is that making someone have sex?! This sounds a bit cheesy but in my head the conversation goes:

Man: I love you but we haven't had sex in several months and it is making me unhappy. I would like us to change the situation but If we carry on like this I am going end the relationship because I feel like I am it is not right for me.

From what I understand of what you've said you think any intercourse between this mans his partner constitutes a rape?

Brighton, you seem to be trying to come up with various different scenarios here where you think it's acceptable for women to have sex when they don't want to.

Why?

Sabrina - I disagree

What do you disagree with?

This is what you've done throughout this thread - commented on various scenarios and demanded "is that rape?" - "is that?"

No man should pressurise a woman into sex she doesn't want.

Does the scenario I've just introduced count as pressure / rape?

Don't put your penis inside someone else unless you are 100% sure he/she wants it there.

If you are not 100% sure - ask. Ask verbally, non verbally, stop for a moment and see if he/she urges you on, whatever.

Tis very easy to avoid raping someone with this simple plan.

Exactly. If you are sure consent exists / existed you have not committed a rape.

So you agree that scenario 2 is rape, then, as man in scenario 2 could clearly not say he was 100% sure woman in scenario 2 wanted his penis inside her?

Excellent, we are getting somewhere.

No, I'm afraid I still don't agree scenario 2 was rape.