Manshake

[Quax]

I have always hated shaking hands. It's such a masculine thing to do. I would honestly rather hug someone than shake their hand.

These were unexpressed thoughts before I met Mr Handbreak.

Seriously, I have moved away from him now, but how do you deal with a man that wants to keep shaking your hand in order to crush it and cause you pain?

Everytime I think of how I've cringed and buckled at the knees and then said "that hurts" fills me with rage. I wish i had used my left hand to punch him in the throat.

Has anyone else experienced Mr Handbreak?

I will happily do the peck on the cheek thing with other women. I do find it a bit weird with men though. I have a pretty firm handshake, but have also come across men who like to out-firm your firm iyswim? It's a bit disturbing to be honest.

I tend to take my cues from others, so, Buffy doesn't do touch..... Nod, smile and say hello, but another friend is a hugger..... So will do a perfunctory hug. If I know someone well then hugging is fine, if I don't, I have a fairly large area of space around me which I don't really want to be invaded.

Do I have to hide my comedy specs and whoopie cushions and be a humourless feminazi now? Oh poo :(

I like handshakes because of the distance, I really don't want anyone's face that close to mine unless I really know them well and want to hug them.

The OP's neighbour is definitely odd though, I can't imagine shaking the hand of any of the my neighbours, maybe on the very first meeting but beyond that? I think that he was enjoying deliberately intimidating her.

I'd not stick my hand out to someone I didn't like unless I felt I absolutely had to. If that makes them feel awkward then tough.

I like handshakes because of the distance

Me too, there are certain people I would like to keep about 2-3 feet away from me .

I have to do quite a lot of hand shaking in my job, with men and women.
I have osteoporosis and an overly firm handshake can break my bones.

It's really awkward trying to find a way to get round this.
Usually I pull out of the handshake just as it's beginning. Having to explain this by telling new associates about my condition is hardly appropriate though.

And it's ALWAYS men that I have to pull out with - never women.

Handshakes are now "masculine", "sexist" and "misogynist"? That's a new one. Better break down the "patriarchy" quick so we no longer have to shake anyone's hands.

Welcome to MN Vena. Just posting on FWR, or will you be spreading your 'wisdom' around the rest of the site?

I hear 'The Doghouse' is a friendly sub forum.

I hate hugs or kisses except from family and close, close friends. Mind you, I don't get handshakes either. Just pointless touching . When I used to host meetings I never initiated them, though obviously participated.

Going to Italy, where even the waiters hug and kiss you and nowhere has any tea, makes me feel profoundly English.

Vena
As an evil feminist my plan to solve this issue is to smear period blood all over my hands so no-one wants to shake them. Take that patriarchy!

Italy makes me feel very feminist. I bring my own tea..

In the past, I've had a farmer wring my hand in a very 'hearty man of the soil' manner, and, as I had just recovered from a broken wrist, it hurt a lot.

But he was used to pulling lambs, chopping logs, and milking cows, so I had to think it wasn't personal- he just didn't know his own strength, and didn't have any radar to think that he didn't need to use the same strength he used to bale hay shaking hands at a cocktail party.

(He smelt a bit of silage too, so I think he was a real, live country mouse, on a quick trip to the city, and hadn't quite figured out the running water and soap!)

I never shake hands, and if someone sticks out their hand to me, I fist bump, in a bro styleé, but mostly I keep my hands full of books, bag, phone, keys, and I waggle them and nod a bit when saying hello. Seems to work.

Better than head butting à la Thorin Oakenshield I suppose.

Why can't we just bow like the Japanese?
Very civilised in my opinion.

Thanks for having our backs MNHQ!

Olivia is on fire tonight!