"as a man.." "I am a male and..." "speaking as a bloke..."

[AnyFucker]

Oh do fuck off.

That is all

Oh, thank god, yes.

And can I add, 'Hi ladies ... blah blah blah. Discuss'.

Fuck off.

..... aaaand fuck off some more

God, the "ladies" thing really twitches my toffee.

"Hi mummies..."

Die.

Yes, indeed.

It's not especially an MRA thing, but it's such a massive giveaway when someone is trying to sell/advertise something on the sly, when they start a post with 'Hello mummies'.

I notice the MRAs are currently setting up the 'but ... wait ... isn't this a site for parents' shock revelation on another thread. Subtle.

My wife would be furious with you all if I had one.

I can't be sexist coz I have a mum, innit.

but ... wait ... isn't this a site for parents' shock revelation on another thread

Mm - just being helpful in case anyone hadn't noticed the big 'by parents for parents' strapline? I do sometimes wish it was called 'ParentsNet' - I doubt it would change the demographics much but would avoid that particular twattery.

Oh, I think what they are actually going for is the 'FWR is full of childless harridans whose empty wombs sting them into frustrated anti-male efforts'.

But yes.

LRD, yes, because you can't be a feminist and a parent - what with the whole penis-hating thing.

I used to post with a different name (until dd2 started quoting my posts at me) and it never entered my head that I should point out my gender. I think this NN makes it obvious, though the last one should've too. What was strange was starting a thread in AIBU after starting an identical thread in FWR (a lovely poster recommended I do an AIBU) loads of posters referred to me as 'she'. As a man I took that as a massive compliment.

As a woman, I know that its difficult for men to appreciate how they come across when they mention their gender. They might think that they are merely highlighting that when they say 'my partner' and then 'she' they are not lesbian, or are saying that they are aware that society, expectations, viewpoints can sometimes be gendered even without the actors being aware, because that is the context in which the advice is being sought, but they are not - at least in the mind of some of the regulars, because some of the regulars hear 'I am a man' and picture a massive godlike tool wagging their finger and telling them off in a Dickens-y sort of teacher sort of daddy sort of way. This isn't fact you know, because, as a mother, I know that sometimes emotion clouds the thoughts of the most intelligent child when they are in a foot-stamping tantrum.

True, winni.

I do often feel as if, when someone rocks up saying 'as a man ...', I should be wearing a nun's habit and peering over the convent wall at this unknown representative of a foreign species ...

Oh god, yes. Because, y'know, we sometimes need to be told what we are doing wrong. Especially wrt feminism! And we don't want to be scared away by these strange creatures we don't know how to relate to.

Nicholas, kim, that's it. I couldn't care less whether its a woman or a fella advising me on what type of wine I should get. Or advising me on handling ds's epic meltdowns. But someone replying "as a man" or even "as a mum" sets my teeth on edge. Its just so bloody patronising.

Imagine if everyone started their comments with "as a female/male, I think this..." There's just no need to announce it. I make my opinions on people to do with what they have to say not whether they have a penis or a vagina.

ABF, as a woman, I think you have made a very good point

I think many of you are being a bit harsh here.....

repeat offenders maybe, but for the first timer who has stumbled across Mumsnet and is additionally a bit unsure of netiquitte it may well seem polite and respectful to say who they are and from where they are coming from. Asking for advice from such a site can be a bit daunting, and have no idea how you may be received.

if not so gentle nudges changes nothing in posting style, then they get all they deserve. As Tiggy said recently, it's never a good idea to start a conversation bollocks first.

You can usually tell the difference, TBH, pan.

Not always, but usually.

Pan, what we sometimes find is when a "gentle nudge" is given, it can trigger a huuuuge manly tantrum about how we are misconstruing what is simply a "friendly overture" and what a bunch of vipers we are and how the Daily Mail is right about us < yawwwn >

Having said that, those threads are usually started by the hairy of hand. Which unfortunately reinforces the idea that a thread that commences with "as a man" or "hi ladeez" is to be viewed with derision and/or suspicion

if blokes just didn't do it in the first place it would help

it's not like they don't understand how patronising it is, because I assume these blokes don't march up to a bunch of people in a pub and start spouting his opinions "as a man"

or maybe they do

could we have a special thread where posts with these openings get quarantined - call it ' as a mere male' or Mansplainers Anonymous
or even 'am I being masculine?'

(btw, I am outraged, and so is my wife)

Surely an opinion is formed by one's brain and not the penis or vagina?

Therefore drawing attention to your genitalia usually precedes a massive piece of twattery.

In my opinion.

The "as a man"-ing threads are normally started to tell us that we neglect our children/hate men/are far too sensitive about silly rape jokes. A man asking for rship advice will usually be treated as any other poster.

Can I add "I fear for my sons" and "as a mother of boys" to the list?