Make love not porn

[Hullygully]

New sex site, founder keen to educate men about "real love making" not porny stuff.

Hurray?

erm...

Porn film:

Woman walks into room. Her clothes fall off. Two men penetrate her simultaneously in close-up while she moans loudly. They come. The end.

Real life:

Not like that.

Sorry: Not like that - one hopes.

Yeah, and it is the 'not like that' which is the stumbling block. What is it like then? And even if 'real life' sex as currently dictated by somebody is one way, and porn is the other way, are they the only options?

have you had sex in real life that you enjoyed and felt to be non-exploitative?

If yes, like that.

If not, I can't help.

I don't really understand what you're on about tbh.

I think spaniel is asking rhetorical questions

are you, love ?

what is the meaning of sex....well, it's different for everyone innit

My idea of what constitutes a healthy sexual relationship is probably very different to somebody else's and all that. I still couldn't quantify it though.

I'm not convinced that it is the actual acts depicted that determine whether or not something is exploitative or enjoyable.

What will be enjoyable and non-exploitative to me is not going to be to somebody else. I don't see how you can make a video that shows people what enjoyable and non-exploitative sex is.

I would be astonished if my ideal sex scenarios were the content of this video.

Maybe making porn from a womans point of view rather than a mans iyswim.
Im not giving tmi, but seriously does anyone enjoy cum on their faces and the arse stretched like in many of the films produced today??!!
I would like to watch porn where women get some satisfication without being be-littled by some man pushing her to the floor, trying to choke her with his bellend then proceding to f the s* out off her bare ass, her looking in severe pain then him squirting all over her face-I find that the sexist thing about porn, its all focused on the man getting his end away. No wonder some men don't know how to please their lady after watching that sort of thing for years.

X post.

I'm not asking rhetorical questions particularly. I am interested to know what is in this video, because I think it is going to say a lot about what women are supposed to like. And I suspect there will be a whole heap of misogyny in the depiction and assumptions of what women are supposed to like.

er yes

I am slightly staggered by the confusion over the difference between porn and mutually consensual enjoyable sex.

perhaps it's just me.

it's not a video, spaniel. it's an internet tv service.

Why don't you read the article I likned to above?

Or do you prefer to just make assumptions?

I did read the article. I must have missed the bit where it was an internet tv service; I thought it was a series of videos. So apologies for that.

I can understand the difference between porn, as it currently is, and mutually enjoyable sex in my mind.

But if I was going to start up a business in anything, I wouldn't describe it as what it is not. I would explain it in terms of what it is. And if mutually enjoyable sex videos are so obvious, what are they then?

really?

really?

I don't know.

My brain has fallen out and gone for a walk.

I have got distracted by Toad in the Hole on the tellybox

do all men in their 20s treat women like they are in or out of a porn film, really?

surely it cannot be all men in the 20s?

is anyone on here in their 20s and can give their view?

I can't as I am 34

there's a message in there, somewhere

no, not all I don't expect

I would love to live in a world where misogyny had never existed, and in that world I can imagine people making videos of each other having sex and it being lovely and sexy and so on. Because I like seeing sex too.

But I think, for me, no matter how tastefully this is done, no matter how good the intentions behind it are and no matter how close it comes to some/all women's ideas of great sex, it's still something I'm not comfortable with. Because while we do have misogyny, we have the idea that women's bodies are there to be looked at, and penetrated, and used for profit, something like this is still part of that conversation about what women's bodies are for, even if it's trying to be a qualifying or dissenting voice. I just don't want to have that conversation, I want it not to be up for debate. If that makes sense.

I don't know if that makes sense and I'm certainly not judging anyone else, just trying to say why it doesn't work for me.

I am not having a go at you. It just worries me

owl - no, they don't. I'm 27, DH is 25.

I was really interested in having a look but Bof has ruined it now with her talk of feathery strokes

Thanks, Hully.

porn no

erotica hopefully

how depressing otherwise.

if women are enjoying themselves and having a good time, why can't it be non-porny?