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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

A chatty, questions and random comments thread

302 replies

LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/09/2012 18:13

There used to be a lovely 'Chat' thread where we could all be silly or just comment/witter on about stuff, and I've not seen it since this place got renamed to 'Chat'. Would it be a good time to have another random chatty thread going? I think there are some newbies having a look around after the thread about calling yourself a feminist, so maybe it would be a nice thing?

So people can ask random questions or make comments without feeling they have to jump right in to an ongoing thread or write an OP, if they don't want to.

OP posts:
Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/09/2012 20:09

Oh, sure, but I guess I mean, isn't it odd a childminder really doesn't earn all that much/get that much respect. My aunt is a childminder and I think she must be a good one, she usually has a waiting list. But she still gets regular comments about how it's not a 'real' job, or people being surprised she has more qualifications than O Levels (she has a degree).

I don't know what the answer is, though.

OP posts:
Mydogsleepsonthebed · 15/09/2012 20:41

LRDtheFeministDragon - that's very sad that your aunt gets treated like that. I don't know what the answer is either.

I have struggled with having a more equal relationship than I had with my husband. I felt really guilty for a long time if my partner washed the floor or cooked, even if I was working and he was home first.

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/09/2012 20:44

Oh, I think she is quite able to laugh it off. She loves her work (most of the time!), from what I've seen. But thank you. Smile

I'm rubbish at sitting around while DH works but I have got a lot better at it. A juicy thread on MN usually keeps me fixed to my sofa.

OP posts:
PeggyCarter · 15/09/2012 20:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 15/09/2012 21:06

Oh, I am curious who he is now. Grin

DH hasn't the slightest interest in going on here but regularly gets updates about the funny bits or asks me to go and get information from the Hive Mind.

OP posts:
PeggyCarter · 15/09/2012 21:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 15/09/2012 23:48

Good idea to have a new chatty thread LRD.

Waves night night to all as have had busy day and much Wine

MyOrangeDogShitsGoldMoney · 16/09/2012 00:15

Still lurking and learning but will definitely be brave enough to start posting soon!

I've learnt so much from lurking on these boards though. Mostly about why certain things piss me off when no one else I know seems to notice them IYSWIM.

My Mum for example who constantly praised stbHx for being good around the house and DBiL for being great with DNiece. Just 2 examples of things that made me fume with silent rage yet everyone I tried to explain it to didn't get it.

Mydogsleepsonthebed · 16/09/2012 12:09

I have a question. My daughter's school (primary) have uniform for the girls which is skirt only. They are not allowed to wear trousers. IIRC uniform is not compulsory at primary level? And also, isn't it sex discrimination if the girls aren't allowed to wear trousers? Or am I picking an argument for no good reason? (Which is what my mother says)

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 16/09/2012 12:35

Mydog uniform is part of the "contract" with the school so once you are going you do need to wear it regardless of age.

But yeah, definitely write to head or governors about adding trousers for girls!

Goldidi · 16/09/2012 12:36

And skirts for boys if they want to wear them.

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 16/09/2012 16:07

Thanks snatch. Smile

I find skirts only for girls really odd - does anyone else have memories of trying to do PE in a skirt and finding it a right pain? We had those ridiculous pleated mini-skirt things with a wrap-around fastening that kept coming undone, god knows what we looked like. The dads of muslim girls got fairly cross about it too, which isn't especially feminist but does seem to be the sort of thing headteachers have to think about.

OP posts:
TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 16/09/2012 23:24

Yep remember those skirts. And sodding gym knickers as well. Yuck.

Mydogsleepsonthebed · 17/09/2012 09:20

Oh yes. Big blue horrible knickers.

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/09/2012 09:28

Yeah, I'd forgotten about those. And we were encouraged to take our kit home 'once a week' to change so ended up wearing them up to three times a week without washing. Blee.

OP posts:
OneMoreChap · 17/09/2012 11:39

Mydogsleepsonthebed Sun 16-Sep-12 12:09:38
I have a question. My daughter's school (primary) have uniform for the girls which is skirt only. They are not allowed to wear trousers. IIRC uniform is not compulsory at primary level? And also, isn't it sex discrimination if the girls aren't allowed to wear trousers?

My daughter - as a primary school pupil raised in as an issue and they ended up allowing girls to wear trousers. Which didn't hugely amuse brother as she used to nick his strides.

messyisthenewtidy · 17/09/2012 11:44

Good on your daughter, onemore!

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/09/2012 12:18

Very practical, though, having a unisex uniform. It's surely a lot cheaper!

If it's not bad form to ask a question on my own random-questions thread, can I ask if anyone's going to Reclaim the Night (the women's march as a demonstration against rape myths/all sorts of anti-woman twittishness) in London this year, or hoping to go? I went for the first time last year and I really enjoyed it.

OP posts:
StewieGriffinsMom · 17/09/2012 12:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MmeLindor · 17/09/2012 12:49

Our school allows girls to wear trousers. DD sometimes wears a skirt, sometimes trousers.

Here is another question:

When we moved to UK, I set up bank accounts etc. I did ask to be put down as Ms Lindor rather than Mrs but it seemed to have been forgotten.

I had to have a new card sent when we changed account types and asked at that point to have it changed to Ms. Of course it came with Mrs Lynn Lindor.

I know it is totally trivial, but I get cross every time I fill out a form and have to put Mrs Lynn Lindor on that form.

So, do I get them to send me another new card or suck it up till this one expires?

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/09/2012 12:52

I'm not sure I have an immediate feminist argument against soft play, SGM, but I can work on it ...

Mme - new card. Otherwise they'll never learn and it'll be a right pain if you end up using the card in a context where you need your card and other ID to match.

OP posts:
TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 17/09/2012 12:54

Sends soothing white noise to SGM.

My cards just have first name/surname or initials/surname - would either of these be ok?

Original poster
LRDtheFeministDragon · 17/09/2012 12:56

I prefer those - it's a bit naughty, I know, but it's so much easier when I need to give DH my card if I know there's just initials on it, as he'd struggle to explain how he was Ms LRD.

OP posts:
OneMoreChap · 17/09/2012 12:59

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Mon 17-Sep-12 12:54:04
My cards just have first name/surname or initials/surname - would either of these be ok?

Ha.

had to send some cards back twice as they said

Mr O ManChap

if I'd wanted that, I would have bloody said so!

So now they read One MoreChap.
Send the beggars back until they get 'em right!

MmeLindor · 17/09/2012 12:59

I did huff about it even having my full name on it. With middle initial.

I think they said they had to put Mrs or Ms on it. Not sure.