non working mothers

[lorcana]

are non working mothers betraying their sex ?

it's not a defence. nor do you sound interested but quite judgemental tbh.

SM's point about goddessing is good, some people overly embrace aspects of their live and make them more than they are.

Until I recently agreed to take a step back to give dh the freedom to travel more and go forward with his career (hugely benefiting our family as a whole in the long term) I had a job / profession I very much enjoyed. For me it was always just a job, for another of my colleagues at the same level it was very much a career that she was hugely proud of. Her personality was hugely defined by her job.

I imagine you know the type of people in the workplace I mean? Neither of us were better or the worse at our role for it except I was paid more because I was frankly awesome

Some Mothers are like that too. Some happen to be a Mum as part of who they are. For some people who they are is a mum.

That's why I think your op is a daft question.

If I am asked what do I do I say SAHP. I've actually used the opportunity to slowly build up a business at home. As well as effectively being the wrap around childcare that allows dh more freedom in his work. But I don't tell people about it as it'll happen over a time frame that works for us.

I have no more or less value than anyone else on this board. I don't feel cowed by the WOHM supporters nor do I feel intimidated by the SAHP supporters. My children are happy, cared for and have respect for both of us. Just like most others dc's feel for their parents.

Does that help your interest?

Deeply weird OP makes absolutely no sense. How can you betray your sex? So each woman by virtue of having a vagina represents all women as a whole? .

You're sounding more odd than interested, tbh, OP.

What about stay at home dads? There are lots around here. Are they betraying their sex too? Or is it just women that you have decided shouldn't take the role of caring for young children because you don't approve? .

No Kerala men are to "be challenged in the work place".

OP, what about adults who do not wish to engage in paid employment for reasons other than being parents? There are people who would rather write, paint, or dabble in woo all day than get a job. There are people who aspire to self-sufficient, nomadic lifestyles. There are indeed lazyarses who want to lie around watching Jeremy Kyle and drinking Special Brew all day. If you wanted to explore the situations and motivations of adults who refuse to enter the job market because they want to do something else, you might have an interesting article or indeed just an interesting discussion. But focussing entirely on the SAHM/WOHM 'divide' is a bit tedious.

That was a very interesting post HoneyDragon

All is interesting - many questions could be asked. I'm particularly interested in the dynamic that provokes the virulent explosion of defensiveness in the non-working parents. Some people have explained that in some measure ,others have been trapped in it. What is apparent is that 'staying home' does not really benefit children nor society as a whole.

Are you just going to keep posting the same things without actually listening to anything posted to you?
Because a blog might suit you better than a discussion board.

Sgb that would actually be an interesting disscussion.

Lorcana
Please point out one defensive post on here other than your own?
You op and points are basic and actually quite juvenile. You have also chosen to post this question in a topic where you don't even understand the very basics of the principle.
I get the feeling from your posts that your not actually reading them.

How does staying at home fail to benefit children?
How does it have a negative effect on society?

Equally
How does going to work benefit a child more than not? They still require a stand in caregiver? The outcome for the child is the same whether a parent works or not.

How does a SAHP fail to benefit society? There are an awful lot of them out there and yet civilisation has yet to fall.

Not at all. I work pt, have worked ft but have always worked. I respect someone who makes a different choice. Its just not for me.

Is this thread still going on? I was sure it would be zapped by now. What crud.

KRITIQ, they don't delete ops just because they are dim and short sighted

"a blog might suits you better"

Roffle

SGM, I did like the mini debate that started, but then the op got involved and hijacked her own thread which I though rather rude

Pags comment was pure gold, and totally spot on.

Why is it that when women offer opinions that differ from other opinions they are not just disagreed with in a debating style, they are actually subject to the pouring on of much scorn and derision and patronisation.

I only got to page 5 of this thread and felt I didn't want to read any further. One poor poster offers her pov in a polite and reasonable way and she is derided for it in the most obnoxious way I've ever seen.

For offering an opinion that happened to be her own.

Blatant nastiness that ensures no-one dares to answer back.

And I'm not talking about the OP.
Thread has moved on, I just felt very bad for one of the earlier contributers.

Anyway, as you were.

Why is it that when women offer opinions that differ from other opinions they are not just disagreed with in a debating style, they are actually subject to the pouring on of much scorn and derision and patronisation.

^^
That is a subject worth talking about, well said. You've brilliantly summed up something I was thinking but couldn't have expressed nearly as eloquently.

I appreciate I've come in too late with my offering though Honeydragon, I read the first 5 pages and was appauled at the treatment of ElasticNipples and others who were being polite, reasonable and offering just their interpretation of motherhood. Even if you disagreed with what was said, you wouldn't be downright rude and patronising surely? That's just a lesson in how to silence the debate with aggression.

Thankfully it was a single poster minority being vile. I suspect that's true of RL. Most people are nice.

People give up engaging though. I'm just as bad, as I am happy to see the validity in others opinions and have no issue with someone who has an opposing viewpoint. But I get tired of people who cannot accept others may disagree with them and resort to throwing insults so I ignore. In RL live I'm more likely to take people to task but here it's easier to just go "Meh" and bugger off to another thread.

I rarely post on SAH/WOH threads now, as an adamant fence sitter I tend to piss people off by not picking a side

Pag also pisses people off too by being obnoxiously reasonable