letting the MRA trolls win

[feministcrashdummy]

Seems to me like this is what has happened.

Yes, the attacks we had from MRATs were appaling. Yes, MNHQ's response was disappointing, to say the least.

But has it really come to the point where we are so sceptical that we justify ourselves spouting venom at each other?

We namechange to protect our privacy but it leaves us vulnerable to attack from within ourselves.

How is this not letting them win?

If they wanted to 'divide and conquer' then they have surely succeeded .

Personally, and I understand why this might not be the choice for others, I'm going to stay. I'll keep fighting the partiarchy, in whatever way I can. I have nothing to prove to anyone else. I'll keep namechanging to keep under the MRATs' radars even if means I'm flying solo.

Sorry to bring the wittiness of this thread crashing down (and it did make me ) but what attacks, what response from MNHQ. Can somebody post a link as I am quite confused. I only get to pop by now and again.

Ooopss. Apologies for missing the question marks.

Gazillions of man-trolls, who have largely fucked off now, and MNHQ posted to say that they would leave their rape myths etc up, as long as they weren't direct personal attacks against individual posters (but insulting feminists as a group is ok, apparently), because the FWR section is about feminism rather than for feminists to post in, and that if we wanted a safe space where misogyny wasn't tolerated in which to discuss our feminism, we should fuck off find somewhere else to do so, as that's not what mumsnet is about.

HTH.

Yes - we'd asked MNHQ to maybe clarify (with a statement at the top of the thread) whether it was on to come onto this section with the deliberate intention of arguing against/being hostile towards feminism.

The response from HQ was that yes, it was fair enough for people to come here in order to argue against feminism and we should just be nice to them.

A lot of us talk off board in various environments where woman-haters are not welcomed with open arms. The level of hatred MRA's showed us, made many of us realise that talking on MN wasn't enough, we had to up our activism, so we've been really busy - in the last few weeks there's been Feminista 11, The Fawcett Day of Action, Reclaim the Night (in various cities) and various other conferences and events are coming up. Plus of course, the strike tomorrow - there's a lot going on atm and people are still pretty wary about spending too much time in an environment where trolls and dangerous woman-haters are given the benefit of the doubt while posters who have been on MN for years, are told to fuck off.

It was made very clear by MN, that unlike racism, misogyny is tolerated here and if feminists wanted to talk about feminism in a space where misogyny is treated with the same zero tolerance as racism, then we'd need to go elsewhere. So um..... MN isn't the only feminist space on the internet and it certainly isn't the safest, but I don't think it's fair to imply that people who have name changed, have given up on MN, we're still posting here and whenever I meet other feminists in RL, I always tell them about the fem section of MN and recommend it. You're not flying solo OP, there are plenty of feminists round here and I'm sure they're all working as vigorously as you to overthrow the patriarchy.

FWIW, at Reclaim the Night in London people were mentioning Mumsnet Feminists.

I wish I could have got to the vigil. I was thinking of you though.

oh i got a warm glow inside at the idea people were pleased to see mn feminists and a moment of grief for all my deleted posts

The vigil was lovely. It was nice to go to a small event and have a chance to meet the excellent MWR women, and Julia and Anna from Object were there too (I was a bit star struck by Anna though tbh )

I have the same warm glow Saf!

The vigil does sound wonderful ... I love how varied feminist events are, I get the impression feminism is very good at looking at all the different emotional/practical/intellectual ways to communicate and using all of them.

Watching BBC News, just heard some words penned by one of the people on this thread.

Tis true, we are getting so much more done now we spend less time pissing around on MN and more on actual activism.

AIBU to think the MRAs have done feminist activism a favour?

The day I stopped engaging with MRATAOD (MRA Trolls And Other Derailers) was the day I was able to be more useful, productive and above all, influential with my online time

So cheers for that

What was that you said again, OP ?

i'm assuming it wasn't 'fuck this, i'm off to bleach my arsehole and dance in my heels'...?

LOL.
No, it was an anti-cuts Christmas carol sung by demonstrators at Westminster.

I wish.

I have a suspicion it was a tad more witty than that.

I had to name change, briefly, a few weeks back. At the time, I was being targeted by trolls on quite a sensitive subject. It's quite amusing to see how people's reactions change to someone when their name is no longer familiar.

I've been spending less time on MN lately, but not because the MRA trolls drove me out. Being targeted was horrible, but name changing wasn't letting them win. It was simply a statement that I'd had enough of being targeted by the trolls; I have enough leeches in real life, without people trying to break me down emotionally online.

I never understand the claims of "venom" being posted by the Feminist section. I went through a period before becoming a regular here where I was still victim blaming to an extent. It was more to do with personal hatred than anything else, and trying to deny my own experiences. Sometimes, to the untrained eye, the words from some of the regulars (myself included) may seem harsh, but they're dished out with a dose of empathy for the survivors on here. Our passion and compassion are miscontrued as venom, and yet we're subjected to personal and group attacks. I've yet to meet one feminist on MN who conforms to the stereotype that the rest of MN claims we conform to. Instead, I've met a group of strong women, from every background, who've been there when I had no one else to talk to about things.

We haven't been divided, we'e been diversified. We've even had posters who have previously shown some resentment (?) show some more empathy towards the FSWR section... Maybe we're not doing as much wrong as you think we are...

I didn't intend to ever come back to this but I've been so upset that it's effecting my work so maybe some 'closure' will help me move on.

I was stalked IRL years ago (before the net) and so I've always been very vigilant on here and elsewhere online to protect my ID. Sadly this seems to have left me open to attacks/bullying/venom spitting/whatever you want to call it from people within these environments (or was that environment?).

It strikes me as ironic that, in order to fight/protect ourselves from the MRATs (and I do realise that this was necessary) that some sections of this community have themselves started behaving like the very people we despise. It's like being back in the school playground and turning up one day to find your so-called mates from yesterday huddled in a secret corner bitching and laughing at you.

It was bad enough having the MRATs doing that, but to do it to each other?

Shame on you.

You keep going on about this "venom", etc... Can you please explain where?

OP, what are you talking about ?

perhaps if you tell us what other names you have posted under, we might have more of a clue

at the minute, this just seems like a fuss about something none of us have ever witnessed here

what is it you want, exactly ?