What Does Being a Feminist in 2011 Mean To You?

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

I know this has been done before but I think it's nice to do it again.

I'd like one or two comments on what feminism means to you, or what you feel is a particularly important feminist issue to you right now, in 2011. I'll get the ball rolling because if memory serves, this was the conclusion of the last discussion like this:

• Do you believe men and women deserve to be treated equally?
• Do you think think this is happening yet?

If the answers are 'yes' and 'no!'', then collect your feminism stamp on the way in, and let's hear you ....

'What Does Being a Feminist in 2011 Mean To You?' - it means hope for the future. It means that when we observe bad stuff happening we don't merely get gloomy about it, we think about what can be done to resist or undo it, knowing that feminist action can and has worked.

It also means understanding what is going on, when things look not quite right.

And it means connections with many fabulous women who continue to engage, inspire, impress, console and amuse me.

I've always been interested in women's rights. I now call myself a feminist.

The bile spewed by some people at the mention of the word feminism has been enough to persuade me how relevant and necessary it still is.

It's marvellous. I see it everywhere now. In a non-feminist context, we had a property developer proposing that the council re-route all the roads in the town centre in a totally nonsensical fashion. Everyone was up in arms that it was being considered, loads of letters to the paper and all that. But, I knew his game. He wanted one road pedestrianised because he owned a lot of commercial property on it and wanted his tenants to get more footfall. So he painted a nightmare of a plan so that his "revised" one seemed much more sensible. And it worked!

yes, and no.

The fact that teachers in secondary schools are almost universally called 'miss' or 'sir' - ie., female = small child, male = knighted. The fact that MY OWN DAUGHTERS tell me 'for god;s sake shut up about feminist things' when I say anything about Friends or The Big Bang Theory. The fact that I saw a game in Tesco today called 'His and Hers: The Game That Celebrates Our Differences'. Kirstie Fucking Allsop and everything she stands for.

I do see that it works against women, though. The Tea Party in the US use the Overton Window a lot, I think.

I agree that a really important part of feminism is consciousness raising and shifting the overton window.

For example, when women are talking about their experiences and what things mean to them and a man comes in and tells them that they're all talking crap and the only valid thing that they've talked about, is something that he finds interesting and important, because he automatically believes that his viewpoint is far more valid and important than those of mere women, and he gets to say what's important and what's not, many women are conditioned into believing that that is true and they feel that their experiences and opinions are automatically invalidated because someone with a penis tells them that they're talking about the wrong things. If you've had your consciousness raised, you realise that just because this man who has no idea what it is like to be a woman, tells you that your perception is bollocks, it's not you that's the problem, it's him.

And men having their consciousness would be really great too, I think feminism in 2011 needs men on board recognising their privilege and challenging it in themselves. Many men are incredibly arrogant and self-important without even realising that they are although on a rational, logical level, they believe in equality. But they are so culturally conditioned into being used to women deferring to them, that when women don't, they perceive that as women being arrogant and wrong headed in a way they don't feel, when other men don't automatically defer to their opinions. And it would be very nice if men had their consciousness raised as well, so that they didn't do that quite so often in predominantly female spaces.

REally interesting questions, thanks OP, and also comments. It's great that we are able to have these conversations but it's also a sad indictment that we're still needing to have them!
Though I think the issues of equality should be discussed and talked about by all of us, often, whether that's to do with inequality in wealth, homophobia in our children's schools or government policies that perpetuate racist attitudes towards our vital immigrant communities.

Personally I think being a feminist is about encouraging myself, my daughter and any other woman I care about to achieve the very most that they can, and to challenge injustices wherever I / they see them.

Dotty - yes, I agree, all inequalities need to be challenged.

I like what you say about encouraging women - that's one of the things I love about MN, that it is a really good place for women (and some lovely male posters of course, but overwhelmingly we're women posters) just being good to each other.

I think as well what it has meant for me, is not living with cognitive dissonance any more.

And yes, it has meant liberation. Real, deep down, psychological and emotional liberation.

It's fucking brilliant.

But at the same time, it can be harder than living in denial and glossing over stuff. I feel I'm far more uncompromising now, far less willing to overlook shit and far more noticing of it, I suppose. Which means I spend a lot of my time consciously noticing shit I wouldn't have noticed a few years ago but choosing not to comment about it because I can't be arsed to have a mindless discussion about it just at the moment.

It means deconstructing everything. And realising that everything, every cultural product, is up for deconstruction.

Now I know what the Overton Window is and all thanks to this thread :).

Eleanor - great post. Your first para - so true.

ER - oh, yes, cognitive dissonance!

I'd never come across that idea before coming on here, but it's a great de-stressing tool, to say 'no, I don't have to keep trying to hold two contradictory views .... I can just accept it's all bollocks, smile, and let it go.

Big YES to Eleanor (how cool do you think she would find it that you are posting that stuff in her name?)

I don't think most men realise their privilege. I don't think most women realise men's privilege either, to be honest. What I see around me is blokes operating like it's their world. They own their space, both physically and psychologically. Lots of them do what the hell they want until they are stopped (and the stopping is often of a legal bent in terms of business, for eg). And you know, being the one to put the brakes on that behaviour is draining, on a social level.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that feminism means clarity. It gets to the bottom of so many of those "why"s that I have been pondering all these years. And the feminists I have met in a virtual sense on here are such amazingly clear thinkers. They astound me every day with that.

I agree.

I think as well, feminism is a collective, collaborative way of doing things. We all work together and I think some of the clarity comes from having a lot of posters all commenting and putting pieces of the puzzle in together. That really helps - because if I don't understand one view, I know there will be someone else who can explain in different words and make me understand that.

From experience, I have found that the most misogynistic environments are also the least collaborative, and I don't think it's coincidental at all.

yy and lol to EleanorRathbone re And it would be very nice if men had their consciousness raised as well, so that they didn't do that quite so often in predominantly female spaces.

and

For example , when women are talking about their experiences and what things mean to them and a man comes in and tells them that they're all talking crap and the only valid thing that they've talked about, is something that he finds interesting and important, because he automatically believes that his viewpoint is far more valid and important than those of mere women..

Really brilliant thread. Love this place. Love the feMNists.

I think that what this board has done, has clarified thinking as people have picked and picked and picked at subjects.

From the outside, it looks like a load of wanky navel-gazing - OMG not this, it's been done to death - but for me, it has firmed up what I think and been really helpful in helping me structure my thoughts. And as LRD says, it's women talking together, sparking off each other and creating an energy and a whole load of ideas that land somewhere.

It's why anti-feminists hate this place so much. The idea that women are thinking, and not being directed to the correct direction of thinking, is really frightening to them.

You know something else I love? That this is a space where I could type away in frustration till my hands were bloody stumps and come out with "FeMNists" in a moment of madness and it's been taken on and I get to see it everyday as my own little part of the story.

BorgMiNd, I love you

Oi, nowt wrong with wanky navel gazing - for some of us it's the natural mode of communication you know.

Yes, it was on a FWR Chat thread and I was ranting and it just flew off my fingers and LO! I'll never be so inspired again.

Yes, Eleanor - it's the chipping away at stuff in a collaborative way. It's what blokes have been doing for years, but without so many "sorry"s and a bit more "Hmm, old chap, if you wouldn't mind me positing another viewpoint whilst you pass the port" or "Fuck off! That's a load of shit, THIS is what's important".

Wonderful thread with some really thought-provoking posts. Thanks to LRD for starting it and many brilliant posts, especially Sunshineandbooks, Prolesworth and EleanorRathbone.

I've considered myself a feminist (though I didn't know the word) since I was about 7 and some boys told me I couldn't do something I'd just demonstrably done, because I was a girl (they'd thought I was a boy because I had short hair).

So yes and no to the OP's questions, but initially on a gut reactive level, not in any real intellectual way. It's only since I had a daughter and considered the kind of world she's going to grow up into, and came across this part of MN that I've actually thought about stuff rather than just reacted from an innate feeling of 'that's not right/unfair/shouldn't be like that' (which is what informs most of my beliefs, if I'm honest!).

The FeMNist board has taught me to challenge so much more and yes, that can be exhausting, but the alternative isn't worth thinking about. It has raised my consciousness and for that I thank you :)

By the time I have thought of a decent answer it won't be 2011 any more.