Apologies SwallowedAfly, it was Shecutofftheir tails who peoposed this 'thought experiment'
"The argument is not that relationships are a waste of time, it's that heteromonogamy wastes women's time.
My point is that we live in a culture that tells women that they can't have children until they've found a man who wants to "commit" and that given that women's fertility is time limited, that that culture puts women at a disadvantage.
The thought experiment is to imagine a world where women choose when to have children whenever they choose throughout their lives, regardless of their relationship status. So maybe a young woman decides to have a child straight after college before further study. She gets pregnant by a close friend "with benefits" who is involved with their child. They never life as a couple.
Then she qualifies and works on her career for a while. By that stage she is in a steady relationship so has another two children by her then partner. She gives up work when the children are small and starts her own company. Her relationship breaks down, but as she approaches menopause she decides to give motherhood a last chance. She is single, so uses a sperm donor.
During her 30s she has also donated eggs to a gay couple who wanted to have children by a surrogate.
A woman who lived her life like this would be excoriated for having 4 children by 3 different fathers, for getting pregnant before starting her career, for being an older mother. That's not how the script is meant to play out."
I can see how this would suit women's fertility window, but otherwise as a 'thought experiment' I don't think this would be a great way to have children, for their well-being, security and development. I don't know if it was presented as a preferable model, but I am just saying I don't like the sound of it. Waiting for a good partner and trying to keep that family together seems ideal to me, if difficult - though other lifestyles, like single-mother, or gay adopting, should not be seen as 'bad.'