Some men really hate women being single don't they?

[solidgoldbrass]

inspired by a couple of other threads including the separatism one. Have you ever noticed that if a man you don't like or know or fancy is trying to persuade you to date him or spend time with him or even just talk to him, the only really effective way to make him fuck off is to tell him that you are another man's property. Just saying No, leave me alone, no thanks, actually I am having a conversation with my female friend and am not interested in talking to you, never seems to work until you throw in My Boyfriend or My Husband.

Actually, across all the classes, women have socialised together without men's company; from the I suppose middle-class W.I. weekly meetings (although the W.I. has members from across the class system) to I suppose the more working-class bingo sessions.
Women like to be away from men and men do not like approaching a group of women out on their own.
Men and women need time away from each other and both sexes need, want and are happy for this to take place.

This is the problem I have with this thread. The overall theme is that it is one massive bitchfest against men including statements which I believe to be nonsense that men can't tolerate a group of women out on their own. In my experience, this is quite the reverse when it comes to the jealous, possessive sort of male. A friend of mine's ex-husband (and it is good that he is 'ex') was very keen on her going to weekly meetings with other women only.

No women should have to put up with threatened/actual physical assault of any kind or be called names if she tells a man to go away, but if he hangs around a few minutes or so after she has asked him to leave the public space which she , presumably, does not own then it is arrogant of her in the extreme to expect him to leave the area there and then and the tone I am getting here is that women expect men to leave the area because they say so^.
Imagine if a man wrote 'that she did not leave even though I said so', let us face it, he would have a flaming along the lines of: Why should she leave just because YOU said so?

Man describing an incident where a female tried to chat him up and he wished her to stop it.

"I was in the pub the other day, some bird started to talk to me. I had no interest in her so I told her to go away. Instead of just leaving there and then, she had the fucking nerve to continue to make smalltalk to me for 5 minutes and then went to sit at a table 2 feet away from me. The bitch just couldn't take the hint and fuck off to other side of room".

Sorry for language, but, really, the majority of women are saying exactly the same thing on this thread and getting away with no criticism at all.

I am surprised that so many posters have such a low opinion of men.

All this fuss saying men should be entitled to pester women in clubs - why do you think men aren't capable of understanding and reading the normal cues of social interaction?

When you object to the idea that Nuts/Zoo damages men more than women - do you think men are too thick no recognize this?

One poster says he has only received the harassment women record receiving on a regular basis, twice from women. Do we really think the majority of men are just not clever enough to understand that there is a huge difference in behaviour here?

Until society recognizes that men have the capacity to understand these things and to modify their behaviour, we will never move forward. Men are being treated as giant, privileged babies.

The fact that is is posters who object to feminism who are the most vocal in characterizing men this way is stunning - why on earth would you think it's a good idea?

I haven't got a low of opinion of men, I've got a low opinion of feminists who think that they have the right to get away with the things they are supposed to dislike in men.

If ANY man said to a woman that was talking to him, 'I don't want to talk to you', the feminists (well the non-thinking kind at least) would say, 'how dare he talk to you like that! You were talking to him. That is all'.
They would excuse her continuing to make smalltalk as 'standing her ground' and if she stayed in nearby vicinity it would be: 'You've as much right to be there as him. Don't let him push you out!'

These feminists are full of s*it, frankly, if they cannot bring themselves to let men do the same.

'If ANY man said to a woman that was talking to him, 'I don't want to talk to you', the feminists (well the non-thinking kind at least) would say, 'how dare he talk to you like that! You were talking to him. That is all'.'

Eh? Where'd you pick that idea from? I think the only speculation on how a woman should respond if she started an unwelcome conversation, other than your own, was mine - where I said I'd feel embarrassed for misreading the social cues! I certainly didn't say I'd make the response you imagine here and I object to you putting words in my mouth.

You may have a low opinion of feminists as well as a low opinion of men, but that doesn't make your attitude any less damaging. Decent men, whom I know a lot of, are just as insulted by your rude assumptions about their social abilities, as women are.

I've got a higher opinion of men than the majority of feminists, but that is not too hard given that most so-called feminists are hypocrites.

You know as well as I do that if a man came on here complaining that a woman who he had told to fuck off did not skedaddle when he said so he would get grief and be flamed. 'She's as much right to occupy the space as you do!', 'She was ONLY talking to you!' would be the response.

Like I have said time and time again, as long as man not abusive (in any way), so. f*ing. what?

And here is another thing: I've never experienced a man being abusive to me when he has attempted to chat me up and failed. There's been a few minutes of awkward smalltalk, offering to buy me a drink, before he announces he is to go chat to a mate/dance/whatever, but that is all.
Am I offended because he does not leave there and then because I said so? No, I am not because I am a reasonable human being, that is why.

I've never had this - I've had a few men chat me up in pubs who I don't fancy at all - but it's quite easy to show you're not interested. ( walk away??) - I've never had a man not take a subtle hint and keep on and on ( maybe I'm just not gorgous enough lol )
women can be a pita to men as well though - I've seen it.

Also, you've usually made dreamy eye contact with the person you eventually approach - that's my main experiences anyway - most people aren't confident enough to dive straight in. ( unless you're 21 maybe )

Really Wamster? You've been exceptionally lucky then.

I've been told I'm everything from the very mild stuck up bitch to being so fucking ugly he'd have had to put a bag over my head if he fucked me anyway.

Some men have just wandered off. But most have felt wounded at being rejected (I presume) so felt it necessary to hurl an insult as they departed.

"Really Wamster? You've been exceptionally lucky then."

Going on this thread, I suspect Wamster has great social skills. Which is something that the so-called feminists on MN are greatly lacking in (hence their problems with the world, which they like to blame on men...).

Bonsoir - I don't feel the need to simper when I am interrupted mid-conversation. I'm not aggressive or rude but I am direct. I don't think that warrants a torrent of abuse.

I am not misinterpreting anything. The overall theme is that when a woman tells a man to go away he should just do so because she said so. wtf?!
Would you go away just because a man told you to? Or would you feel a bit: 'hang on, I'm only talking to you? I'm doing no harm'.

I don't know how many more times I have to say it: but abusive is not acceptable, hanging around for a few minutes, making a bit of smalltalk, then slipping away, is.

Obviously, ChristinedePizan, has a genuine reason for complaint.

I don't find it likely that a man who posted on the feminism board with the sort of experience you suggest, Wamster, would be greeted with 'she was only talking to you'. It's much more likely that - as has been the case with experiences of rape, sexual assault and DV, posted by men on this board - they would be replied to in the same vein as any female poster.

For what it's worth, I would go away if a man told me to go away. Certainly I would: because I would feel so, so foolish and embarrassed that I had misread the signs and it had gotten to the point where he had to spell out the words 'Go away'. Can you imagine the mortification?! I wouldn't be able to get away quick enough.

Have you never interrupted work colleagues with unimportant fluff, only to be told 'actually, VG, we're busy at the moment'? Or - even worse - boomed over to friends full of the joys of spring only to find out they're discussing a bereavement? It's mortifying.

What I find particularly interesting is that there is a large section of men who seem to have this response turned off when it comes to women.

Some of the best nights I've had has been spent chatting with men I have no sexual interest in - do women only talk to men they want sex with? I could never tell anyone who is just chatting to 'fuck off' - how rude.

Oh come off it, ffp, there's been loads of posts on this thread about just those sorts of experiences. This thread isn't about rich, fulfilling, hilarious conversations with men, and you know it.

Would you go away just because a man told you to? Or would you feel a bit: 'hang on, I'm only talking to you? I'm doing no harm'.

If I started talking to somebody out of the blue, who was already talking to someone else (which I probably wouldn't anyway, I would only do that if there were definite 'I wouldn't mind talking to someone' cues) and they ignored me or told me to go away I would do exactly that. Why stick around if you're not wanted?

"Asinine and pathetic" lol You're such a delight SGM

?

I did actually have a female stalker for about a year. I met her through a mutual friend, we went out once for a drink (platonic), and she then proceeded to call me/text me four five times a day, continued to do so when I didn't respond. One night I switched my phone off and she left me three voicemail messages, at around midnight, 1am, 2am. I also think she should have fucked off very early on when I stopped responding to her texts all calls.

So are you saying I should have just put up with this as well because she has just as much right to constantly phone and text me?

"The overall theme is that when a woman tells a man to go away he should just do so because she said so. wtf?!" What a ridiculous statement! Of course someone should go away when they are asked to! What on earth is wrong with that? That is the way social interaction should occur. If you don't think that should be the case then your boundaries must be incredibly skewed.

Again (for about the fourth time) if someone told you to go away would you?

And actually, when this did happen I went to MN for advice and they said that I should block her number etc., it's very weird behaviour ... knowing it was a woman harassing a woman. No twisted feminist agenda, just a dislike of rude people.