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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Should I write and complain <dithers>

18 replies

ComradeJing · 28/07/2011 06:06

I've never written in and complained about anything but this has really annoyed me.

Opened an account for myself and a savings account with an Aussie bank for my DD about a month ago and I noticed that although I had said SAHM for my occupation the bank had listed me as 'unemployed/dole recipient'

Opened another account for my DSD last week and the women said 'are you still a SAHM? Sorry but the computer had no other option for SAHM other than unemployed/dole recipient.'

The more I think about it the more cross it makes me. Should I write and complain? Do you ever complain to companies?

OP posts:
Original poster
ComradeJing · 28/07/2011 06:07

Sorry, some very dodgy grammar in that post!

OP posts:
Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 28/07/2011 06:10

I'm not keen on the 'dole recipient' part, certainly! I guess from the bank's point of view they want to know if you have any income of your own, which you don't. But there's no reason they need 'dole recipient' on there. How would you feel about 'not currently employed', which I see a lot of?

Original poster
ComradeJing · 28/07/2011 06:33

Not currently employed is only just about acceptable but only from the POV that the bank wants to know my income.

I'd far rather it said SAHP or caring for own children. Something at least to show I AM doing a job. I do believe this is the exact attitude that contributes to the 'working' parent believing that they don't need to do anything at home as clearly the 'unemployed' parent is doing sweet FA all day. Hmm

OP posts:
TheRealMBJ · 28/07/2011 06:34

I would want to, but would probably end up leaving it. TBH, I wouldn't be happy with 'not currently employed' either as I a employed, just not earning money.

Perhaps 'no paid employment' would be better, ideally I would like SAHP but would accept house person to.

MrsClown · 28/07/2011 10:20

I would certainly complain. I always complain if a company sends a letter addressed to Mr and Mrs with my husband's initial. It drives me mad. My first name has not changed. I always call the company and ask them to send us another letter correctly addressed, or I write them a letter but the phonecall usually works. If I was you I would contact the head office and find out who is responsible for it and suggest they put it right.

LRDTheFeministDragon · 28/07/2011 12:59

I think complain. It's like using 'Ms' not 'Miss/Mrs' - some people will just roll their eyes but if enough of us do it, we send a message, in this case that being a SAHP is valuable (and not the bloody dole - how rude!).

ChaosTrulyReigns · 28/07/2011 13:02

Is "dole recipent" an actual official term in Australia? Or is it slang like here?

Awful anyway.

MrsReasonable · 28/07/2011 22:39

I wouldn't complain; the bank doesn't really care what your job is - they just want to know what kind of income to expect. They labelled the '£0 wage/salary' category 'unemployed/dole recipient' because that will be the status of most people in that category.

Original poster
ComradeJing · 29/07/2011 07:09

Chaos I assume it's an official term but only because that's what is written on the paperwork.

Ok, assuming DD sleeps on the flight I'll compose my email on the way home and won't report back when they ignore

OP posts:
puzzlesum · 29/07/2011 07:21

I think you should write to complain. I regularly have to choose some hilariously-named occupation for my DH (a SAHP) from 'house person' to 'domestic duties' but I would not want to put him down as 'unemployed/dole recipient'

HerBeX · 29/07/2011 10:37

i think it's worth complaining. It's only by women pulling organisations up on this sort of thing that they can raise awareness and eventually change things.

solidgoldbrass · 29/07/2011 12:33

It would be better to divide it into waged/unwaged/self-employed/benefits. Which would give them the information they are reasonably entitled to want (how much money you have) but not involve what appears to be judgements of people that are not accurate.

solidgoldbrass · 29/07/2011 12:33

Mind you (can you spot I work in market research) you always get the one or two who defy categorization ie have a Private Income or some such.

whyme2 · 29/07/2011 13:10

But MrsClown that use of your husband's initials is the correct (if outdated now) way to address a letter to the both of you. Using the term Mrs is an old fashioned way to address some one, I think a more equal way of addressing a married couple would be;

Mr M Person and
Ms F Person.

Just saying that if you use the term Mrs in your name then it is the correct form to use your husbands initials.

Being the Mistress (the term Mrs is derived from Mistress) of someone denotes a low place in the pecking order imo.

StewieGriffinsMom · 29/07/2011 13:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Winetta · 30/07/2011 06:52

Long time listener, first time caller, hello everybody!

whyme2, I've also heard this explanation but I'mn ot sure as to whom (a group of men, perhaps?!) declared that is it "correct". Archaic, certainly! Hopefully the usage will die out, correct or not Wink

Re: complaining, not something I had ever thought of doing officially but I will be doing so too in future. I'd say go for it!

TheRealMBJ · 30/07/2011 06:55

I actually think Debrett's have changed their stance on the correct form of address. Even they have recognised that it is archaic.

FuzzpigFourFiveSix · 30/07/2011 07:01

Complain if you want to - that pisses me off too. Unemployed, rightly or wrongly, has connotations that are nothing to do with choosing to be a SAHM.

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