Separatist Feminism

[VictorGollancz]

Ok, I really am really very late for work at this point but I thought it might be nice to have a space in which we can discuss separatist feminism. I've read a lot of advocates of it, and even incorporate some elements of it into my own life - I prefer not to live with men, for example - but I don't practise it totally and I can't find any examples of any separatist communes.

Does anyone know anything more about it? Does anyone live in a separatist way?

Surprisingly good Wiki link here

Only if biological ties are kept, in fairness loads of people have no right to be parents. My net doesn't reach that far..... If you have no intention of creating a life with ample opportunity to grow knowing both parents then no, don't have them.

Really, crapola?

I think that's an awful way to look at it. My friend's dad died when she was a very small baby and they knew he was going to die - I would strongly argue that they were right to have her.

I don't think there's any evidence children miss a 'parent' they never had, is there? And what about adopted children?

so are you saying that lesbians shouldnt have children then?
[im on about the ones that for whatever reasons dont keep in touch with the biological father-or concieve through SD]

but however much a woman may want her ex to want to be a father to their child, the man always has the option of scarpering. and in some circumstances may escape the reach of CSA/legal responsibiity.

The thing is, Crap - how can anyone know? I mean, I'm fairly sure my DH isn't going to do a runner on us and completely walk out of DS's life, but frankly, who knows? Who knows for certain? I have no guarantee he won't be hit by a bus tomorrow. It seems like you think if I went on to raise DS without getting involved with another man, I'd be failing him in some way.

Weird.

Plus of course, there are plenty of mothers who are doing the very best for their children by keeping them the hell away from awful fathers. So frankly I find your judgements about women who can't or won't produce a husband/father/nice nuclear family setup for their children a bit snobbish, frankly. Who are we to judge what 'the best' kind of family looks like?

It's the intention though isn't it? I wouldn't think of thinking my right to be a parent was more important than a child's right to know their parents. Adoption is very different as a child is much better off than one in care.

Biological parents, not anyone.

I don't judge, nature and research do. Not denying the impact of money, if course.

None of us know what's going to happen, so control what you can.

And Noone would suggest a violent/abusive father was better than none. (post vanished when offline)

In nature there are many parenting set-ups, though, including single dads, lesbian couples, multiple-parenting groups ...

I don't know what research you mean, but I'm sorry to say I doubt it''s content given the rather obvious flaw of your 'nature' argument!

Actually save your amatuer psychology SAF, you're wrong. Again.

My angry undertones are disappointment.

so are you saying it would be wrong for two women to have a child together and have no ties with the bio father?
are you saying that it would be wrong for a single woman to have a child and have no ties with the bio father?

It's interesting that you find reasons why adoption or single parenting might be ok ... it's really a homophobia issue, isn't it? You don't believe two women (or two men?) can provide a child with what it needs, do you?

What qualities (I know you don't want to 'reduce men to a penis') is it you think two women would lack as parents?

So we want donors not fathers?

Had I thought feminists were as stereotypical as the Daily Fail portrays I never would have bothered.

I don't see what's so controversial about saying a child should know both bio parents, if at all possible.

Fuck off with the homophobic crap. I have many gay friends that are parents, men and women......but they have relationships with the other parents. Much harder for the gay male parents, as their children care much more about not having their mother. It's biology, roots, who you are, why a parent doesn't want to be around.....all of these things crop up.

Sal, I'm not sure that's what she's saying, though - she's referred to 'nature' and 'research' for the benefits of having a male parent, which is a bit different.

I hope my children, if I have any, will be with my DH - but I'm not sure what unique parenting qualities he will bring as a result of his Y chromosome or his penis! Surely they will be the result of him as a person? Crapola has a major logic flaw.

Sini...... Phew.