Resisting femininity experiment - who's in?

[sethstarkaddersmackerel]

I was thought-provoked by the 'I'm a feminist but....' thread, particularly Dittany's posts, in which she talked about women who choose not to 'perform femininity'.

I posted on the other thread that I hugely object to all that bikini-line business but do still shave my legs. Am not sure why I do this, so I think I'm going to stop and see how it feels. It felt like a major issue when I was 20 or so but I actually suspect not shaving them now would make me feel more, rather than less, confident.

So I wondered if anyone else was thinking about giving up any beauty practices or other elements of compulsory femininity and would like to do it together and see how it feels.

this is not a competition - if you decide after a day you hate it and can't live without it, fine, but it would be really interesting to hear about, and I think it could advance our understanding of how this all works.

anyone else in?

btw, I am in a vile mood today so if anyone wants to come along to the thread and tell us we are just falling into the trap of thinking all feminists have to have hairy legs, or that actually they wax everything and are a still better feminist than meeeee, I will tell them to fuck off because if you don't 'get' this I can't be bothered explaining, either you get it or you don't

Speaking of boob-related stuff, WTF - Nipple Enhancers

I would really love to talk to a group of women in a non-bra-wearing culture about their breasts.
oh, and to know what they think of ours, of course.

I stopped wearing a bra when I started breastfeeding my ds2. It just happened accidentally, not for feminist reasons, but because I was breastfeeding him lying down in bed in the middle of the night and it suddenly struck me how convenient it was not having to fumble about with those little clip thingies on maternity bras when you're half-asleep. And then I realised how comfortable it was. For the first few months I used a coouple of vests and sewed pads into them to deal with the leakage, and then I stopped leaking, so it wasn't a problem. And for the record I am 95D in European sizes, so hardly flat.

Alex (did conversion - you are right - hardly flat!) Will you stop wearing them permanently do you think? - wow this thread has moved someway from hariy legs....

Thanks, Lenin. It's actually about my cousin, rather than me. She's going to have a CP and they are planning to conceive with donor sperm. I'm ridiculously excited for her! She's had to put up with so much nastiness, to put it politely, directed at both her and her DP, and they've really come out of it so much stronger. It's great that they want to take this step. Now I just need ideas for a gift!

Blackduck - I don't know, really. I haven't thought that far ahead. I suppose so though, it's so comfortable. (btw how did you do the conversion?)

ds2 is now 15 months and still breastfeeding. He has to have lots of physiotherapy (he has hypotonia) and when I do his exercises with him, sometimes I do put on a slightly tighter vest -from my pre baby thinner days- just to stop the bounce, as it can get quite strenuous.

thanks again, Lenin.

I have tried not wearing a bra during the day but they get very sore, which is worse than the slight constriction I can sometimes feel (in which case I usually just get refitted or try a different bra) I think it would make a big difference if they were even a bit smaller but they really are huge. Just not something I feel able to give up for comfort reasons (although will ponder a bit more my whole attitude to breasts/cleavage/sexiness as that does need a bit of examination I think)

Alex - power of google!!

So, has anyone grown a beard yet ?

And you're interested because...?

And you bothered to reply in that vein because ?

I don't know, perhaps because I'm a little suspicious of the motives of a first time poster called Proud2bFeminine coming onto a thread about rejecting compulsory femininity and not bothering to introduce him or herself or share his or her experiences first before jumping in with a question that completely misses the point... So, now I've answered your question, would you like to answer mine?

OK, firstly I'm, not a 1st time poster and secondly like you, I don't know, curious I guess.

Anyway, thanks for telling me I have to introduce myself, share all my experiences and then ask permission before posting on a thread.

But, seeing as you asked so nicely, I'll give you my view. For the record I think rejecting compulsory femininity is self defeating. Doing something like that only serves to give them more control. I'd rather do exactly what I want to do, and what I like to do is look as good as I can for me, not anyone else, and if I hear the stereotypical jibe then it just shows that it is the rejecting compulsory femininity participants that are missing the point rather than making a statement.

Now that's more like a first time post on here - something to actually respond to rather than something a bit facetious.

I too want to look as good as I can for me. And for me that means not having to do all the things that society as a whole has decided are what women should do, but just doing what I think makes me look and feel comfortable. Now it's nice if the social construct of femininity ties in exactly with how you like to look for yourself and that you are proud of that, but for many women it doesn't.

time for my post again:

If anyone has a problem with us doing this and posting about it, well tough, I can't be bothered to justify this to people who don't get it. If you are genuinely interested and want to know where we are coming from then read some basic books on feminism, maybe The Female Eunuch or The Beauty Myth or the relevant chapters of The Equality Illusion or Living Dolls.
If you have read all those things and still don't get it, then sorry, I can't help you

I wouldn't waste too much time justifying it tbh; if someone genuinely wants to know why we are doing this there are plenty of pointers to help her find out more. If she isn't here to understand, merely to criticise, then that's just rude, and not worth responding to.

LoL @ thinking people might not get it.

What you really mean is if you don't agree you can just sod off.

I personally don't like having hairy armpits or legs, my decison my opinion. Believe it or not its not because men society demands it but because its how I like it. For you to try and tell me differently I quite frankly find insulting.

It seems to me its you that needs to deal with this