Every time I have sex I get an infection

[Bluefell]

Either thrush or UTI, every single time. So I’m mostly refusing sex on the basis it will cause me pain for days or weeks afterwards. DH isn’t happy about this situation.

It wasn’t an issue before DC, we did it regularly without issues. When we had DC we argued and were tired and didn’t have sex very often, so we haven’t done it much for a couple of years. Now DC is older and DH would like to do it more, which I don’t object to, but I don’t want to be in pain all the time.

We’re going to end up getting divorced if this can’t be fixed. He gets washed beforehand, I drink loads and pee before and after, we use a condom and no lube at all, but it still happens.

So the atrophy affects the whole vulval area and not just the vagina? Because with a UTI the irritation is around the urethra and not the vagina.

Another vote here for D-Mannose. Cheap as chips natural product. It's a game changer for UTIs

Men dont get thrush symptoms and like we do.

Your probably passing it back and forth to each other. Get him to take a thrush pill op both you and him at the same time.

Sorted this problem for me and DH

Cranberry tablets daily to prevent the uti and women's Flora probiotic tablets daily to prevent other infections. Also check other preventions for thrush - eg cotton undies and scent free shower gel and detergent. I've had this too, it's awful! Go to GP to check if any underlying issue?

Yes. It can affect the whole pelvic floor but definitely can involve the vagina, labia, perineum and clitoral hood, as well as urethral meatus. It’s known as GSM - genitourinary symptoms of menopause.

https://menopausesupport.co.uk/?page_id=13751

Does he have banalitis.? (Nasty bacteria living under foreskin) I had a bf who had it, no symptoms for him but every time we dtd I'd end up with bacterial vaginosis.

Try reading some erotica ahead of time so you're physically warmed up. Men get a visible increase in blood to their bits, women get 3x the increase that men do but it's not visible as mostly internal! Being properly aroused makes extra padding to protect the equipment iyswim.

Plus add loads of lube, try using the BV tubes instead (normal lube contains sugar which can set off a yeast infection/imbalance).

I developed a latex intolerance during pregnancy. I get infections now when using condoms. Have you tried different ones?
I also got Utis from it sometimes, so now i alway shower right after and i take probiotics regularly to prevent. This seems to help. Havent had an infection for at least a couple years.

And for 70% of according to that link. How depressing!

OP, I am sure it is thrush yes but this can be caused by genitourinary symptoms of menopause. That coupled with your other symptoms means HRT is highly recommended and if you don't want to take it then just vaginal HRT will help immensely. But just for the local effects. Vaginal HRT won't help with mood, libido etc.

Sorry that you feel this way now OP, I think the problem is lack of natural lubrication down there because of your disinterest. It may sound odd but I would find something that arouses you like a spicy book/film, etc. for inspiration. Also, I used to get UTIs often at the start of my current relationship years ago, not so much anymore, cranberry juice seemed to help somewhat and peeing after too.

OP, from September until the middle of January I had thrush almost constantly. You have my utmost sympathies because it is fucking soul destroying. Like you, it was almost always caused by sex. Also, we would treat my husband each and every time which was weekly. Unlike you, I really enjoy sex and so just not having it wasn't an option and I was always ready for sex so it wasn't anything to do with not being 'ready'. My male GP was absolutely useless and so I took matters into my own hands and ordered 7 days worth of thrush oral treatment from chemist direct and took the every other day over 2 weeks. I also started taking Optibac for women. I haven't had thrush since then. The optibac is fantastic stuff. I darnt not take it daily now.

I really hope you get it sorted because it's horrible and at times my sodding vagina was all I could think about.

Hi OP,

I’m sorry that I haven’t read all the posts, but has your husband been treated for Thrush? It mostly has no symptoms in men, and chances are he could be reinfecting you. I would try that. My husband and I have had that before.

I also wonder if you have ever seen a pelvic floor physical therapist? I used to think I was getting a UTI all the time, but it was actually some muscles being too tight and some not strong enough.

I had exactly the same issue, so sorry to hear you have this problem. Doctor prescribed
me standby antibiotics, you just have to take one post sex, this cured the problem for me. No need to take more than one but doing this should keep the infection at bay, good luck with getting this sorted.