High weight is destroying my life

[Depressedanddesperate1]

It's my first time posting please go Easy on me , basically as the title says my weight is destroying my life , I have gained 6 stone since having my daughter, I'm a mess , my body aches , I can hardly walk as even 5 or 6 steps leaves me with lower back pain and breathlessness , every bone in my body ache and I constantly feel tired and run down
For context I finally bit the bullet and weighed myself at the GP on Friday , I am 29 stones in weight I am disgusted to say
My life is a misery , I cannot run round after my child , can't go anywhere without thinking about the seating, recently went to a concert , I always have to book the Isle seats or its a no go
The main issue for me at the moment is My Job , I work full time and worked at home all through covid in an office Job , the last two months we have been back office based and its hell (I work for NHS)
I cannot park my vehicle anywhere near the building I work in meaning even the relatively short walk from my car to the office is is leaving me dizzy and sick, I'm tired all the time , even if a colleague suggests going the shop at lunch time for a walk or fresh air I always make an excuse as I can't face going because I know I can't manage it, there is some suggestion at work also that we will be taking on responsibilities that involve a 30 min walk each day , due to my sheer size I simply cannot do this , I don't know what to do , I can't afford not to work
Days out with family I'm constantly having to sit down , DH Is always the one running round after our child at the park
It's getting to the point that I can't physically manage at all , I'm joining slimming world , DH thinks I should go off sick at work for 6 months and get myself better and fitter , luckily I do get sick pay , would a GP sign me off for this? I feel like I'd be better off dead than living like this and only have myself to blame , my mood is rock bottom.
I spoke to the GP about weight loss surgery

I had a gastric sleeve - I pay for it monthly. I paid £2000 deposit but they would accept £500 deposit. Best thing I ever done - 6 stone down and my health is so much better. I can walk for miles and run after the kids.

Best of luck OP. Hope one of the suggestions on here motivates you to give something a try and it works for you. You can do it!

Look it’s really simple. You have to eat less which is bloody tricky in a world of cheap delicious food which is really calorific.

The trick is not to think what’s making you fat but to think what food is making you unhealthy. What’s pasta adding to your health? What’s corn starch or glucose?

Luckily healthy food will also make you lose weight. No one gains from eating salad, vegtables and lean protein. If that’s all you eat you will also notice your middle section losing inches. All that fat round your organs goes.

It's a horrible place to be - I know only too well, massive stroke in 2013, I lost everything, home, marriage so called friends etc! Had a breakdown a year later, spent 6 weeks in a coma & contracted diabetes during that time! With limited mobility & a poor diet I ballooned up to 22/23 stone & kind of 'Gave up' After over 2 years of sitting around & doing fuck all, I kind of found myself where you are! Losing weight has been a real challenge, I had to drop pretty much all the food I eating & eat much smaller meals, get up on my feet much more despite the crippling pain in my lower legs, multiple leg ulcers (Dangerous) & getting out in the car as I can still drive (A manual car) so lots of leg exercising etc! I kept this up until 2 years ago when I was put on Humilin pens (Once weekly) to assist taking more control of my diabetes & horrendous glucose levels......To keep my story short as possible, I lost 7 stone very quickly, so fast I did not realise it had happened! Of course I still want to/need to lose more but the process has slowed right down now! Everyone is different of course - The point is here: You CAN do this all the time you really want to do it! I was disgusted with myself & up to a point, I still hate what I now am........

You will realise whatever you do to start the process, that there can be no returning to how you were at the start! Eating less is easier than you might think & I guess with your job & child, you have far more to contend with than I ever had to! I'm a bit fed up that it has slowed right up but it's normal as I understand it!

Talk to your GP, ask about what's available to you Go get started girl - You will feel amazing when the weight starts to fall off you!

I am now 16 stone, absolutely no leg ulcers or sores whatsoever, I still struggle to walk far without my walker but this is due to my brain damage, not my body! I can & do support myself, l live alone with zero help & support (My choice) I had carers & adult social services help until 4 years ago when I realised I had to do this for me! This is something you clearly want to do for you! & you can & will succeed if you want it enough! It's hard at the start & will take time but you will be in a better place in the not too distant future!

I wish you all the luck in the world, sounds like you deserve to shed that weight!

@NickEccles Amazing. Thats a really powerful story. So bloody well done and keep going.

My sister had weight loss surgery at a top hospital in Turkey, they took great care of her pre and post op. Yes there are awful places abroad , but that’s the same everywhere.

I'm with you on that, as although we are different weights, and I do exercise, well I do a lot physically day today day as I am a single parent, so it keeps me going and active. Being an anxious person anyway and very self conscious, the thing I hate about exercising outdoors is people looking when I am out of breath. But then I think i could be stones lighter and it still happens so I just have to get on with it. When i feel bad or hate if someone looking and think god this is so hard, I don't know if it will help you, if you try to change your mindset a little, and think well yes it's hard to try and exercise or change things, but being in the current situation is hard too.

Can i just say despite your struggles, hats off to you that you are working full time!!

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@ThatGirlInACountrySong do your own research, it’s clear you only want to refute everything I say so you do you and I’ll do me :-)

Listen to a healthy hypnosis recording on you tube tonight. Visualise. See yourself slim. Eat less calories. Move in your chair. Drink water. Keep your hands busy in the evenings, knitting or crochet. Wear trainers in the house not slippers. Don't eat like a bigger person eat as though you are already slim. Walk. See the gp for referral to gym. Swim. Listen to music. Be positive. If you slip don't stop going. Imagine yourself a year from now as that new person. Wearing what you want and playing with your child. Feeling sexy and confident. Put that in your head rather than hating yourself. Works wonders x

I wanted to say the same, as there is so much conflicting info out there 🤦‍♀️ Yes we know there are various diets/companies with diet plans etc. Then more now than ever 'calorie deficit' which TikTok has become famous for all the weight loss videos. So we are then told once again that of course if those foods are healthy choices, then better, but that look, you can eat chocolate cake etc etc and if you want to do that but it is within your calorie allowance, you're fine.
Then for years we've now been told no no you must eat low carb 🤦‍♀️ but the NHS tell you otherwise. It's very much 'your diet should be made up largely of' 'starchy carbs and fruits and vegetables' protein a little bit 🤷🏻‍♀️
Now of course, they are not saying eat a loaf of bread as long as it's Wholemeal it's fine 😃
It's portion control too, which many of us who are overweight or obese don't do or have trouble doing.
One thing that all diets and NHS dietary advice, does agree on, and that is that bad fats and sugar should be very minimal in the diet.

Sugar for me is a massive issue since childhood.

What do pasta and bread give you nutritionally? Primarily there’re about energy which is no good is carrying masses of stored energy around.

I agree with people who say think about health…stored fat round your organs, blood pressure, pain. Don’t think about weight in terms of looking good or being smaller.

Stop getting other people to cook your food. The takeaways and ready meals are for people with money to burn. Only eat what you make.

At your weight you could easily lose a stone by Easter.

Please try foodaddicts.org

there are no fees or weigh ins. It’s all about recovering from food addiction. I’ve struggled since my teens, this 12 step group is the only thing that has worked for me. I’ve lost 4 stone and have 3 to go and am part of a supportive world wide group of women who know what this suffering feels like x

@ThatGirlInACountrySong because for some of us, any processed grain cannot be eaten in moderation. We start on sugar or flour and we cannot stop, we have no off switch. That’s why.

I did fast 800 twice Lost 6/7 stone both times. As soon as I increased my calories it goes back on faster than it came off I couldn’t keep it up Just eating 800 any longer Also feel frustrated when I see it recommended

Someone I know was a similar weight to you, and I know how much it impacted on their life, so I have every sympathy.
When he hit the point that he decided to do something about it, he found a great therapist specialising in weight issues, which really supported him to take action.
He was diagnosed with diabetes shortly afterwards, and his GP has been fantastic as have the diabetes clinic. He has lost sbout 4 stone in the last 6 months, is feeling so much more positive. He is on medication and his glucose levels have dropped dramatically.
He is on a very low carb diet, and has started going for walks every day and does some free weights at home too. Consistency and developing new habits are vital.
My point is, it's doable but you need support. I think you should be looking at specialist therapy rather than surgery. You can also request working at home due to your medical issues.
My friend had health insurance through work but even if you don't it's worth paying for. Some employers have and employees assistance program that might be able to at least signpost help. Go back to your GP , ask for diabetes testing- you'll almost certainly have some form of insulin resistance which might affect weight loss, and they should be able to offer help.
You've recognised and acknowledged the problem, now you can really take action.
If you need time off work, then take it. But get the physical and mental help you need in place now.
Good luck!

Fast 800 is mainly protein. It’s pretty much all fat that goes in ketosis. Lots of research supporting it.

@Summerpetal I imagine that it’s what you ate after the diet that’s the issue not the diet itself given you had more than 6 stone to lose both times.
If we’re talking anecdotally I noticed I really didn’t gain weight afterwards even though I was eating hundreds more calories. The weight back on when I started eating bread and sweet stuff everyday

Depressedanddesperate1 hasn't posted in a while. I hope @Depressedanddesperate1 is on a pathway to becoming a happier person.

I disagree. Fast 800 resets you.
You don’t think about food because it the mind set is different. There’s no unlimited foods or fake food or substitution. You are given permission to NOT think about food as tasty or delicious. It’s a short, sharp break from I must have breakfast/ lunch/ dinner. It’s ok to feel hungry between meals and use your fat stores for energy. You know you’re getting enough food to keep you healthy.

It’s the break from the relentless pressure of craving food actually.

People would never say to someone on herion that 'moderation is key'. They realise that cutting it out completely and perhaps needing methadone is the way to get off it

If you look at the research around how sugar acts on our brain and body, there are a lot of similarities including the drugs that support drug withdrawal, they can be used to support sugar withdrawal

Some people can eat bread and starchy carbs in moderation, many of us cant, they take up room that would be better used for nutrient dense food in any case and get us craving it more and more. cutting it out completely shuts all that down

I hope OP is ok as this was an old thread that has been resurrected for some reason

I really feel for you op and your message is a bit of a wake up call to me although i am not as heavy my weight is creeping up year on year.

The positive for you is that you can lose large amounts of weight very quickly and it soubds like you have a supportive husband.

Every stone off will make things easier for you.

I have lost 5 stone in the past doing the fast 800. For me the trick was being accountable and recording literally everything I ate. I joined one of the diet theeads on here and shared my food consumption! I planned my meals in advance too. After a week I didn't feel hungry. I found the fast 800 motivational as I lost a stone in the first fortnight (started at around 14.5 stone).

It sounds like you are at a total crossroads. I'm not sure that you need to leave work - that might actually be worse for you.