steve biddulph - misogynist bully?

[workstostaysane]

half way through 'raising babies' he seems to be a big fat bully to me.
anyone else??

Why do you think so? Examples?

er definitely not
I have read several of this books and seen him speak and he always comes across as a well meaning and dedicated person. you might disagree with what he says but a misogynist and a bully? unfair and nasty imho

I think I've got one of his books - from what I remember I was enjoying it right until the final chapter which was a big telling off for mothers who work outside the home.
Have I got the right person?

admittedly, have not read the whole book but felt overwhelmingly in the presence of a bully when after carping on about the fact that women should not dare to leave the home until all children have turned 3, he states:

'the study also rated the children's behaviour ratings on their mother's opinions - hardly an objective measure'
so, women are the only ones able to take care of their children, but you can't trust what they say about their kids! how on earth do you win from this standpoint?
also,
'the most significant factor of all in determining child mental health is maternal sensitivity; the ability to resond warmly and sensitively to the needs of the child'
SB says that is what every study everywhere says, but still manages to write a whole book condemning women who work.
just seemed nasty to me

the only one i've read is 'raising happy children' and i thought he seemed rather sensible and well-meaning.

ignore the B.

Sounds like the one!

He admits to having changed his tune about working mums. He got lots of money from books supporting the choice to work, now he's getting some more from his changed opinion.

I think one lawsuit is enough.

I think he's cool.

i'm still reading and its not getting any better..does he have kids?

BTO - are you AitchTwoOh? why the name change?

ok, going to bed to finish this thing.
be back in the morning to find out if anyone has posted any examples of good sense in his writing rather than rose tinted waffle.

Yep, he has kids, and he is married - there is a really nice book he wrote with his wife. You may not agree with what he says about working mothers but his best book (The Secret of Happy Children) doesn't mention them very much and is more aimed at getting parents to think about how they talk to their children. The first few chapters alone really got me thinking both about my own childhood and about how I want to raise my own children. He also writes in a style accessible by men and my dh will read him wheras most parenting books bore him silly.

And a lot of what he says about working parents and the type of childcare available only backs up the research done by respected people like Penelope Leach. I don't find him remotely mysoginistic - I just think his message is unpopular.

I found him very sensible, although a little unrealistic about nursery options for the under-3s. That was my only gripe with him though. I've only read "Raising Boys".

i started to read the one about not putting under threes in childcare and gave up as i found its emotionally blackmailing tone offensive. i also disliked the way it assumed i was an idiot. i also didn't believe his 'experiences' eg the one where he saw a man in a big car roar past him (saint bidolph was jogging, of course), jump out, unfasten teeny baby from seat and go into a childcare establishment only to emerge seconds later to zoom off leaving our hero pondering the vile nature of a parent who could abandon his baby so swiftly. as i recall he ponders 'perhaps it was a one off and he was in a hurry' but concludes no, more likely the sort of person who is willing to leave a baby in a nursery probably behaves like that every day. honestly. i know women's magazines get away with this crap (you know, those articles that start i have three friends, sally who is morbidly overweight, chris who is dangerously underweight and susan who is just right...aaargh) I expect something a bit more robust, honest and well researched from a childcare 'expert'.
And don't start me on the bidolph message board. i'm still seething and i burned the book at least a year ago.

Katy44, i changed it to give littlelapin a laugh. then i flushed her head down the loo for calling me a bitch.

confused

I haven't read his books - think someone gave us a copy of Raising Boys or something but no idea where it is - but I have read interviews. And he struck me as a rather self-satisfied, middle-brow apologist for sexism. Happy to change my mind if someone can post anything to disprove it, though.

When i first read The Secret of Happy Children I thought he and his wife were over emotional hippies( i was pregnant) after reading after I had my first child, I really enjoyed it, and found that it had influenced my style of parenting a lot, in fact I must dig it out again and re-read the new relevant chapters.
I read raising boys recently and it did make me feel a little down as some of what he was saying about full time wrap around child care did make some sense to me(work out of home myself) and also the fact that parents and family are so important in our society and that perhaps we are sitting on an emotional time bomb in our society. He is trying to get across to the government that perhaps trying to get all parents to work out of the home all of the time and out source their child care to insitutions may not be helpful and that we should be trying to move to a more flexible working, community driven, caring society. He is very pro fathers being involved in their childrens upbringing.
So not a misogynist bully IMO

sorry, am aitch. also was bitch. we are talking over a couple of threads, LL has just admitted to MNing on the loo. also as you can see i'm gripperstebson. you must remember him, he was the school bully on grange hill about a hundred years ago.

[relief]

Has he done a whole book on nursery care then? I've read The Secret of Happy Children and the one he wrote with his wife (that's mostly about babies) - have started Raising Boys but ds is a bit small for it to be relevant, although my friend swears by it. Perhaps it's b/c I am a SAHM I just skip anything he says about childcare as it isn't relevant to me? I quite like the way he interviews - he is from Australia but never works there to protect his childrens' privacy.

I remember Gripper Stebson. Bullet Baxter shoved his head in the washbasin.

"I'll 'ave yer fer assault, Baxter!"
"I'll give yer good reason to, my son!"

Baxter's finest moment (apart from when he thumped Mr Hicks).