Has anyone truly overcome emotional eating?

[4photos]

I have struggled with emotional overeating for my whole adult life and want to stop.

I know my triggers are caused by low self esteem and being lonely but I doubt I am going to become self confident with a loving partner and circle of close, supportive friends without years of therapy, which I just can’t afford.

I had a short face to face course of CBT about 30 years ago on the NHS and the only thing I remember from that is the therapist saying ‘of course, you’ll never find anything that will fully replace food in this situation’, gee thanks!
So, has anyone ever got over emotional eating? Have you actually found something that really replaces that quick dopamine hit? Is therapy the only answer?

I’m not after advice about joining a hobby group or doing mindful activities, I’m just interested in other people’s experiences.

I am not sure I emotionally ate, like I wasn’t gorging whilst weeping or anything, but I did eat for the dopamine hit, bored, upset, happy, good day, bad day, whatever.

and yes, I went on mounjaro, lost the weight, got into the gym, seeing my body change, and got into clothes, so clothes shopping, and a lot of vinted, became my new sources of dopamine, , I basically found my vanity again, my appearance became important again.

Probably not what you are looking for but WLI have stopped my emotional eating, I know if I ever stop the drugs it will come back, but I’m happy to continue long term

Also agree, GLP1s seem to remove the need/desire/ thoughts of/ enjoyment in using food for dopamine hits and yes, this came back when I stopped.

They are the only thing that have really addressed binge eating in that I don’t think about it when on them whereas previously, even when not in an ‘active’ phase, I thought about food all of the time. I believe that there are a lot of anecdotal accounts of WLIs affecting the desire to drink alcohol too and would imagine that there must be research ongoing to see how they have an impact on addictive/potentially addictive behaviours.

WLI and then a diagnosis of ADHD which was medicated with Elvanse.
Which is an appetite suppressant.

If I miss my pills I get picky again though.

So, not really broken the cycle but the medication has made a massive difference.

Am sitting comfortably at 9stone now for about 18 months.

I started a low carb diet last year because I had a high blood sugar test. It has stopped me seeing food in the same way. I used the Freshwell app.

Not helpful I know but I’m 7 weeks into wegovy tablets, and it’s completely eradicated the compulsive eating I had. I know now that there was something physiological going on, not even necessarily emotional. I don’t want to be on them forever so I’ll have some decisions to make!

Yes. Mounjaro. Life changing.

I think so! Very slow process and one that wouldn't have been possible for me while I was still working. I was also lucky that my partner wanted to do it too.
We used the NHS Weight Loss app for calorie counting and record keeping, the Hairy Bikers' Hairy Dieters books/recipes and I joined the local council gym, still going 3 times per week. Also Brennan's 60 calories a slice bread really helps.
The main thing for me is that I have lost 3.5 stone since September 2024 and am keeping it off. Because I know I'll feel crap about myself if I eat chips/cake/chocolate, I just don't do it. The reward is that I look and feel so much better, and I really don't want to lose all the hard-won progress. But it certainly stops me wanting the sort of stuff I used to eat while I was working.
But if I can do it, anybody can! Good luck and don't give up if you put on a pound or two one week, you'll be able to get rid of it. Hope all goes well for you.

Just thinking, I remember someone telling me that unless it was the most important thing in life for you, it would be difficult to make it happen. So just deciding you owe it to yourself might help? Deal with every decision individually - small wins.

Thank you all.

I lost a couple of stones about 20 years ago through obsessive calorie counting and have kept it off, within about 3kg since then so this isn’t my first brush with losing weight. I suppose at first the dieting obsession replaced the eating obsession and then it has been a matter of maintaining quite controlled eating which is exhausting. Viewing and wanting food as a reward or a comfort has never gone away however much I try to believe that nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!

It does look like GLP1s are worth trying.

i would not say I have overcome it for ever ,so that I don’t have to pay attention but the approach that works for me is Gillian Riley’s overcoming overeating. The parts that chime for me include the idea that making the effort to eat well, to treat myself well, is the way to raise my self esteem. I had assumed that I would eat well once I had managed to raise my self esteem.

https://www.eatinglessonline.com/

Paying attention to how I actually follow these guidelines, combined with eating low carb boot camp works for me.

Not effortless but very rewarding way of life.

A follow on question - if GLP1s have removed the desire to pick at food out of boredom or habit, or to use it as a dopamine hit, has anything replaced the actual activity of eating?

I am trying to imagine the alternative scene to where I wander into the kitchen because I am bored and feeling a bit pissed off with life so reach for a rice cake and eat it, then remember I have peanut butter in the cupboard so have another rice cake, but this time with peanut butter. And then because that was so nice (crunchy, tastes nice and it's nuts which are a healthy snack!) I have another one. Then eat some peanut butter off the knife because it is so niiiice, and it's healthy, and then eat some more, and then think FGS, put it away and get out of the kitchen, and wander away still feeling a bit bored and pissed off but now with a dose of guilt at eating all that peanut butter (but it's HEALTHY!). Is the alternative, wander into the kitchen, open the cupboard and look at the peanut butter, think nah, and wander away?

I have come to realise that a lot of my snacking and over eating is because of the mouth feel of food. Chewing gum can be as satisfying as a packet of biscuits just because it is a sensation in my mouth.

Have GLP1s get rid of this for anyone else?

@4photos I have pondered this question a great deal. I was an emotional eater. I had an abusive childhood and food was a source of comfort and also a source of torture, as I hated over-eating and being over-weight. I spent my life yoyo dieting.

In my 40s I had proper counselling for the childhood issues and an unexpected side effect was that I stopped binge eating. It helped me self-regulate better and not turn to food in a panic of desperation. It didn't stop the boredom / sadness / anger etc eating.

Then in 2024 I tried WLI and I suddenly realised how unbelievably loud the food noise had been in my head. I suddenly felt a whole load of other stuff too and felt surprisingly angry quite a lot of the time. In the early days I would find myself in the kitchen, pretty much subconsciously and then didn't know what to do with myself, because food was no longer of any interest to me. I had to feel the feels - it wasn't easy.

Two years on and I've kept the weight off. I take a half dose of WLI these days, which works well for me. I tried coming off completely but the food noise eventually comes howling back like a bunch of irritable, agitated monkeys all shrieking in my head. The half dose keeps them quiet. I still get the urge to boredom eat, but one toffee takes the edge off it and I can recognise it is boredom and do something. I no longer want to eat from stress, agitation, sadness, anger etc.

Hope that is of some help.

It doesn’t cross my mind to eat as I’m bored since I’ve been on the meds, which tells me where I thought it was boredom or other emotions it was more physiological than psychological. I still have the exact same emotions I did before, I just don’t consider snacks, it doesn’t enter my head,

As said you do need to replace fne dopamine hit, for me that was the gym and new clothes, my appearance, even though I’ve been maintaning for about 18 months, is still a novelty. If you don’t then you can feel flat or empty.

Thanks, that is interesting.