How do people become obese?

[Truetoself]

Before someone is obese, they are overweight. Their clothes sizes also change. Why do they wait until they are obese to try and lose weight? Do the majority of obese people have mental health issues?weigh

Putting everyone else's needs and wants first. Having a sedentary job. Having a borderline abusive partner who regards taking time for exercise as a treat you are indulging in at their expense. Having to do many hours in aforementioned sedentary job to pay a university outrageously high halls fees, which they conveniently now force us to pay over the summer holidays as well. Eating for comfort and to feel a bit happier or just for something that is just for you because every other thing in your life is done/paid for everyone else. Having a borderline abusive partner who objects to you having smaller portion sizes because it's unfair (or truthfully because they worry they will get fat and you won't) despite being a foot shorter than them. Not wanting to have a sodding conversation with everyone you meet when you leave the house in your claustrophobic town so just not leaving the house very often, see also having to work all the hours in a sedentary job to pay university hall fees for 12-months when they only teach DC for 6 months.

Do you have mental health issues?

Because 12 years ago l fell down my stairs and broke both hips and pelvis. I had to stop dancing / going to the gym / walking
. Food became my comfort.
Now I've lost 4 stone with mounjaro and can have my spinal surgery and a new hip.

Have you chosen to not read the many posts here explaining the many reasons why people end up obese?

Mirtazapine is well known to cause huge weight gain. I personally know 3 people who weigh well over 20 stone thanks to mirtazapine, having been healthy weights before.

I think you are purposely being obtuse.

I am more or less in this group. Never ever did I see myself in this group but it can happen to anyone. In my 40s, have two chronic illnesses (Hashimoto's and osteoarthritis in the hip joints) and really battling to get my weight down. I can't get out walking like I used to as it's painful. So I have to restrict calories instead.

i understand. But before ozempic around half the population were obese so not everyone has had a horrific thing happen to them.

All I said was I know people who say they can’t afford vegetables as a reason for being obese but then one I know goes and orders domino’s pizza which is extremely expensive I haven’t had one for years for that reason because I’m actually a lot poorer than her and I’m not fat.
Another person I know said she was big boned in fact numerous people say they’re big boned. Which is complete bullshit as well. Numerous people also use being poor as an excuse for being fat it’s not just two people I know.

Anyway, that’s all I was saying. Nothing against fat people who are honest about why they’re fat.

@Choosos being poor is correlated with being overweight and obese, there is a clear documented link. People in the most deprived areas are the most obese e.g.

https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/national-child-measurement-programme/2020-21-school-year/deprivation

The headline quote from that data is "In 2020/21, obesity prevalence was over twice as high for children living in the most deprived areas (20.3%) than for children living in the least deprived areas (7.8%)."

Lots of other data out there if you want to check this. Here's an article that describes how being poor affects obesity levels, for example:

https://committees.parliament.uk/committee/52/environment-food-and-rural-affairs-committee/news/196803/food-insecurity-leads-to-unhealthy-eating-and-obesity/

So your friend might be talking nonsense and is actually able to afford healthy food, and just prefers to eat unhealthy takeaway food like pizza. But that doesn't alter what we know about obesity and poverty.

Surely also no one these days actually says they are "big boned" and actually means that as a reason why they are obese? It sounds like something people would have said decades ago. Can't imagine anyone saying that with a straight face. Surely also anyone capable of some basic reasoning would be aware that being "big boned" is not a reason for being obese even if it were a thing, and something that people claimed about themselves.

No one here on this thread is arguing that obese people are all/mostly saying that they can't afford healthy food and are just big-boned. Not even slightly. Lots of very clear and well explained comments about how it is very easy for various reasons to overeat and very hard to consistently undereat in order to move from being obese to being a healthy weight.

Because they eat too much and the result of gluttony is slow weight gain so it takes them too long to realise.

Mine was
my mum had very restricted and disordered eating.
I saw food and treats as something I had control over after having no control.
I was given a huge dose of steroids for years.
Unhappy generally.
low self esteem.
Combination of all of the above.

I am now nearly 50 and a healthy weight.

Clomipramine was what put me into the obese category. Took me 4 yrs to shift it, but I gradually put it on again as it became impossible for me to go to the gym. (I was working full-time and caring for three adults.)

Age and HRT hasn't helped. I also developed mobility problems caused by patella alta and flat feet. I had to have an operation on both feet and that is why I'm still able to walk.

I'm now in a position where I'm able to get back to the gym and I'm gradually losing the weight again. I've had one of those Inbody scans and I've managed to increase my muscle and bone mass. Still need to shift a heap of visceral fat, however.

I'm in my 60s and carrying most of my fat on my middle. I've shed the excess from my bust and upper arms.

I know a bunch of people who still give the big boned argument one of which actually has a tiny skeleton (short stature, short fingers). I don’t bother arguing I’m sure she knows deep down and is just in denial.

I don’t buy the poor argument either I was homeless when I was 16-18 and even now I’m only on minimum wage with kids and bills to pay and I’ve never let myself go, I was starting to get a little overweight at one point which I knocked on the head and I’ve often wondered why people let it get so bad they’re morbidly obese, just like the op is wondering, I get some must be depressed and just don’t care but not half the population (pre ozempic).

Anyway the op asked and I gave the reasons some people have given me.

I’ve also had bigger people tell me I must have a fast metabolism even though I actually do have an underactive thyroid (which is another excuse sometimes given)

For me, comfort eating and side effects from psychiatric medication.

Or you could try reading some of the responses on this thread.

@Choosos fortunately you don’t have to “buy the poor argument” as it’s a clear correlation as shown by all the available data that we have on obesity. It’s not a matter of belief or opinion.

I got to morbidly obese because I was too busy sorting out everyone else in my family and not prioritising myself. I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, or any other bad habits. The one thing I did do was over eat, as a way of rewarding or comforting myself. And then once you get into the higher categories of obese, it becomes a very daunting task to attempt to lose all the weight. Especially when we know that very few people manage to successfully and also keep the weight off long term. I essentially gave up on weightloss as a possibility for me. I certainly didn’t get to morbidly obese without having had lots of attempts at losing some weight. But it never lasted and I would always regain and put a bit more on each time.

I don't have anything helpful to say other than I am so sorry and I couldn't just read it without acknowledging you.
For what it's worth I just wanted you to know that your post really moved me and I don't wanted to let you know that my thoughts are with you.

Body composition is probably more important than BMI. The BMI was invented over 100yrs ago using the population averages back then. For women over 5’4” it is often inaccurate. A better measure is height to waist ratio. This is because visceral fat is the dangerous fat.

Most male athletes over 6’ are classified as obese due to the excess muscle mass ratio being higher. Muscle volume weighs twice that of fat. Athletes can weigh the same as non athletes but be much thinner. Body types do vary, naturally athletic individuals carry their weight in muscle rather than fat. They are not so much big boned but more muscular.

Weight loss using WLI can lead to excess muscle loss so although the weight has decreased their actual shape doesn’t alter much. Hence the importance of high protein diet and resistance exercise.

I did not say it was the only reason for the rise in obesity. These things are always multifaceted, with several small factors combining to form a perfect storm. I am highlighting one factor.

I also specifically referenced Europe and kilogrammes

I'm overweight as I've been slowly creeping it on the last two years. I'm short, have PCOS, peri, DC, and now an incredibly sedentary job. Exercising is limited to an early morning weekend walk, when I can. I'm careful about what I eat but I also have a huge eating DH and DS, so light, healthy dinners are difficult.

Having done WW years ago, my score for required food came under the minimum anyone should eat - that's when I went to the gym! So it's difficult.

It's generational for some. DH is obese because his DM encouraged sugar worshipping. Was a friend's house for lunch on Friday & her 3 DC & GC were there. All obese. Portions are huge & fatty, and dessert was massive. GC, including the one year old, drank multiple juice poppers & no water. All are obese (including the 12 yo). They don't understand the connection.

A while ago on a different thread someone did a breakdown of conditions, medications, scenarios that create obesity, linking to percentage occurrence in a population, and it fit the numbers of obesity.

The vegetables are cheap argument is ridiculous because humans cannot live on veg alone, we need fats, protein, and healthy versions of those are expensive, and need a level of education and money to prepare and cook.

As for the big boned thing - do you really not know why people say stuff like that? You honestly don’t have the empathy or compassion to understand that being obese is shit, really shit, but that we are highly unlikely to be able to lose weight and maintain it alone (think it’s around 5% who can). When you’re that big losing weight feels like standing at the bottom of Mount Everest and staring at the top, no Sherpas, no equipment, and knowing that it’s a nearly impossible task. Of course you’re going to make excuses for yourself to save face with the ignorant and judgemental masses that create and maintain such a stigma around obesity, who continue the stigma into GLP1 use as well, even though it’s proving to be an excellent and successful way to medically manage obesity in a modern world that pits our bodies and brains against us in so many ways.

I’m obese, and I went on my first diet to try and lose weight when I was just in the overweight category. I’ve been on plenty of diets since then and I’m still fatter than I was before I ever started dieting. And I’m sure that I’m not the only obese adult who started dieting before they were obese.

Unfortunately, it’s an awful lot easier to gain weight than it is to lose it. Even maintaining the same weight tends to take continued conscious effort. And sometimes there’s just too much other stuff going on in life for that continuous effort to stay at the top of my priority list.

It’s just not that easy to lose weight and keep it off indefinitely.
Which I would have thought would be obvious given the numbers of overweight adults out there.

A desk job
General fatigue of life
Poor mental health
Lack of education
Trauma
Poor physical health/accident
Not coping well with kids/work/stresses of life

all sorts of reasons that are not being lazy or eating too much!

Some medication makes you gain weight in a shockingly short space of time. This includes anti-depressants which are commonly prescribed such as Mirtazipine, as well as anti-psychotics used to treat schizophrenia and mood stabilisers like Quetiapine.
I was prescribed Mirtazipine and went from a size 14 to a size 20 in the space of about 6 months. You are constantly hungry. I remember having an enormous Xmas dinner and being ravenously hungry about an hour later. It was bizarre. Also, given the nature of these drugs, you can imagine that people taking them are going to have other stuff going on which may make them less aware that their weight is creeping up 🙃 😉
In my cause I was prescribed Mirtazipine due to a whole lot of shit happening in my life all at once, and in the case of a dear friend who was sectioned, she couldn't leave the hospital till she had been on antipsychotics for a while and if she doesn't take them then she will become psychotic again and back into hospital.

Tbh your post feels awfully goady.

I actually did genuinely believe I was big boned, that I had wide hips and large breasts and that even if I was ever to actually lose weight I would still be big. I was wrong, but I had never experienced my body as an adult without being obese/morbidly obese so I had no idea.