Petite support for losing a few pounds/getting to our 'happy' size

[ACuppaAlwaysHelps]

Hi all. Following on from the thread that @SprayPaint started yesterday, a few of us (@Waiting9 @Horriblehistoree @FaceofSpades) seemed keen to have a thread to support each other in reaching our weight loss/body shape/fitness/health goals.

All petites are welcome on this thread, but it seemed like it would be particularly helpful to have a corner of Mumsnet for those of us who are petite/small framed and officially a 'healthy weight' but know we feel/look better a few pounds lighter (which would still be within a healthy weight/not underweight).

Maybe we can share goals, progress, struggles, things that are working, etc.? It would also be lovely to hear from any petites who are at a 'happy weight' and what you are doing to be successful.

Someone (maybe @FaceofSpades?) posted some helpful thoughts on the thread yesterday.

Please share how you all think this thread could be helpful.

Feel free to share as much or little as you like. Height, current weight, goal weight or other body measurements, nutrition, calories, exercise, NSV, etc.

Im terrible for the sweet stuff. I tend to eat small portions dinner wise compared to other people I know but I can snack allll day.

Joining the team. Currently 10st 5 and need to get down to 8st 4

@Manchesterbythesea I am also IF.
I was out walking 2/2.5 miles a day regularly up until the end of aug when my dog died. 😞. I need to find the desire to get back out and do some steps. As someone put on another thread the other day, it's not motivation I need, it's DISCIPLINE.

Today I've fasted till 1245 then had soup and a thin bagel. Yoghurt with mixed berries

This even dp is doing a Gousto chicken stir fry.

My downfall now is sugar ( so chocolate and cakes)

I have a size 10 dress that I'm determined to get into

For the pp thinking we're all heading for an ED - I have a healthy range BMI and am 'only' 54.5kg, but my waist measurement is 31 inches/ 80cm.

According to the NHS website:

"People with very large waists – generally, 94cm or more in men and 80cm or more in women – are more likely to develop obesity-related health problems."

Reading that makes me feel even worse!! On the plus side that's just made me reach for an apple rather than a biscuit!

Hehe! Exactly.

Also I don’t see why it’s ok for larger people to say it’s ok to be of such and such a weight and bmi is rubbish then when it comes to smaller people it suddenly applies?!

Me and my sister in law are about 2/3 stone different but both wear a size 8-10. She can’t believe how light I am and I don’t see how she can weigh that amount 🤣 we just are built differently but both healthy. But our BMIs would be totally different. But I don’t want to end up with loads of fat round my organs from my biscuit habit!

I'd like to join this thread. I'm almost a stone over my comfortable weight, but am only 4'11". Find it nearly impossible to lose any weight, even only eating one meal a day. I'm carrying it all round my waist since I hit 40 and currently don't fit most of my clothes, even though my BMI looks fine on paper.

Welcome to all the new joiners today. It's so helpful to have a group of people who are all in a similar position. I'm looking forward to us being able to support each other and share tips, successes and struggles.

I listened to this podcast earlier podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/esgfitness/id1360394675?i=1000671252291
I'm not sure I got any answers, but lots of what she said reinforced lots of the comments many of us have made on this thread.

@ACuppaAlwaysHelps thank you! That’s tomorrow’s walk podcast sorted!

I'm just about to go on a run

Been every day this week 💪🏻

this thread is helping

I had my Friday weigh in and I’ve maintained this week. I’m a little disappointed as I have been in calorie deficit all week (logged this so I know what I have been eating) and have done 9-10k steps everyday. I won’t let this get to me and continue what I am doing, even it is demotivating.

@Goodvibesonly you didn’t gain which is good. It’s really annoying though isn’t it! I’m 1lb down and after seeing a few pounds a week at first it’s a bit frustrating (although healthier I know before the ED peeps come at me).
My holiday is very soon and I’m not where I wanted to be but I’m ok with that.

@Radiolala thanks, I know it shouldn’t get to me like this and I should focus on the positives that I didn’t gain but it’s so frustrating that I’m doing all the right things and seeing no results! Even a 1/4 pound off would have been motivating!

Joining. I am petite but due to being in peri-menopause and taking period stopping injections my weight has gone up by about 5kg. My comfortable weight is 50kg (I look good at that weight but I also feel good physically) , I am 165cm tall. Need to go from 55kg to 50kg and as someone said above it’s about catching the weight gain early and acting early, rather then waiting until I’m actually overweight.

I’m doing calorie counting and following 1000 cal per day, this should allow me to shift the extra kg before Christmas. I could then maintain at about 1300cal a day.
The easiest way for me to achieve this has been to skip breakfast and basically have lunch, 1 snack and dinner. That’s it. No seconds either.
I’ve also upped my step count and started walking on the threadmill while working from home.

I’ve already noticed improvements in my diagestion and relief in IBS symptoms. I think I basically ate too much.
I used to be able to eat what I want but sadly in my 40s it is no longer the case.

Please can I join?
It's lovely to have a petite thread. 5'0 here. 9st 4 at heaviest. 8st 13 now and trying to get as near to 8st as possible.
Weight training 5 days per week, and intermittent fasting is working but slowly.
Main issue is weekends. DP moans if I don't join him in a drink and a takeaway but if I do, it's 2 lbs lost in the week and 1 1/2 put back on weekends.

I’m also 5’ 2” and have always managed to make my weight go down again to 52kg by just minding what I ate for a couple of weeks, as in no wine or chocolate!
Here I am at 67 and it’s not working anymore. My weight has crept up to 56kg and mostly round my middle. I can’t excercise it off as I have Cfs so have to be careful with small amounts of yoga and weight lifting.
I am eating between 10 and 6 and did lose a kg but then I put it on again. My calorie count is around the 1200 mark.
Is anyone else not exercising it off and calorie counting? Is it working as I could go down to 1000 a day in the short term.

I've had issues with IBS when I tip over a certain weight - which is pretty much my current driver for being more proactive about maintaining a healthy weight (perhaps more than losing a lot of weight).

My ideal weight seems to be 8stone to about 8stone 6.

It just feels difficult and depressing because its getting harder to do that.

DS and DH are the opposite end of the scale atm. DH is very sporty and DS is starting to become a bottomless pit (he's 10). Its becoming difficult to fed them enough, without getting sucked into me eating too much. Especially as I do most of the cooking.

In the past I just don't have snacks in the house, but thats not really possible at the moment. I've taken to putting them in other places, so that I have to make an effort to get them out rather than them just being there in the cupboard to help myself so much. Even just putting them upstairs seems to help because I have THINK more before being tempted.

I've been trying to switch out more meat in my diet - not going veggie - but reducing the amount and that also seems to help with the weight/ibs stuff.

I am conscious that eating out, particularly at Christmas, is becoming more of an issue for me too. No I do not want a fucking salad. But present me with a standard massive portion and its so tempting to eat it all too and actually thats not good either. I then feel physically and mentally shite for having done so. I am trying to make a point of giving a large amount to my two above mentioned food dustbins to avoid this and seeing ordering as a collective thing rather than being a single thing.

That said, 'food envy' and buffets really are my biggest downfalls. I want to eat lots of different things cos I like them but I can't. And a buffet either means I graze (and then don't see how big the portion I'm eating is) or because I want to try everything I pile everything on the plate and then eat it all cos I want it all / I feel awful about wasting it. The whole not waiting to waste food generally is a big killer for me. Using smaller plates generally really helps me (I love the psychology of how big your plates are and how it affects how much you eat, in terms of being able to help how I think about food and how much I eat - eating out plates are getting bigger and bigger I do notice it more now).

I want to eat all the nice things and socially participate without the comments about 'eating nothing' or 'you don't need to go on a diet, you weigh nothing'.

I don't think anyone on this thread needs to lose what others think is a large amount. I think its 2 stone tops from what I've read. But I do think it involves altogether different challenges because of what it takes to get your calorie intake low enough without depriving yourself of what you need or feeling like food becomes totally joyless and you can never stray from that because you don't have the margin of error to do so. I wouldn't say it was necessarily harder to lose weight at the petite end of height, but I would say it presents different challenges to normal every day things.

I think being petite, there's additional considerations in terms of thinking about weight because of the portion stuff and because of social pressures which perhaps quite as difficult if your normal daily calorie allowance is even a bit higher. 1500 calories a day goes nowhere and it sometimes feels a bit joyless.

That is so unfair. Is he the type who can eat anything and stay slim?

Also hopping in here please 👋🏻

I’m 5’3 and 10stone 1. Age 51.

I used to be always between 8stone 11 and 9stones but HRT has hit hard. Need to get back nearer 9 stones but below if possible. Trying two meals a day because nothing seems to be working - I’ve tried low carb, low fat, IF etc. but not shifted a single lb. I honestly don’t think it’s what I eat, it’s the amount so reducing meals and eating more healthily.

@RedToothBrush
I think you are spot on, it’s very difficult to sustain the low calorie diet with sedentary lifestyle because there is just no room for error.
We have some big holidays coming up and I don’t want to be sat eating salads all day watching my family eat all the delicious foods. I’ll have to balance it with increased activity, luckily we are planning to walk about 20k steps per day which (fingers crossed) allows me some nice treats during the day.
I think I’ll be ok at 1300 per day once I achieve „maintenance” but only if I up my exercise- otherwise like you say it would just be joyless.

No, but he's 6 foot tall, so can eat and drink loads more than me.

@RedToothBrush a lot of what you have said resonates with me there!
I navigate meals out by making it the only meal I have that day, but having whatever I want (including dessert!) and upping the exercise and cutting calories slightly both the day before and after.
I just don't take part in the regular cake-fests and buffets at work - they're used to me now! I still get "but you're TINY you don't need to watch what you eat!" but they just don't get that if I participated in all the food at work I'd be the opposite of tiny very quickly!

I can't recommend weight training enough to anyone here. I run for my mental health (and to give me extra calories I can eat every week!) but weight training has worked wonders to help me stay in shape without having to restrict any more. Bear in mind the number on the scales may not go down so much though, as muscle is denser - however I am well aware that my 8 stone 7 now is a very different 8 stone 7 to when I was happy with that weight in my 20s, doing no exercise on a diet of beer and pot noodles - I am in much better physical shape these days!

I have a few friends who regularly used to go out for a breakfast or massive cake. They are all much bigger than me. I don't have an issue with that, they are my friends and I don't care what size they are. But it got to a point with the comments about me either not having something or only having something very small relentlessly, just got to me. I wouldnt dream about passing comment about their weight or what they were eating because it's rude and horrible. But the reverse doesn't seem to be true. It got to a point where I didn't really want to go out and watch them eating whilst being heckled about it. It really got in the way and made me realise that socially it isolated me. In the end I stopped going because I felt so uncomfortable about either being judged or potentially making them feel self conscious about eating around me. I didn't want to upset them but it just didn't seem to work, probably for both parties. It was really depressing.

I wish people would realise that "just one biscuit" or going full on Mrs Doyle with the "Go on"s is a bit much and at times, slightly insensitive.

I don't see why it's so hard to understand the concept of 'I'm 5 stone lighter than you, and I only weigh 9 stone to begin with, so I'm probably not going to need to eat anywhere near as much as you'.

It's nothing personal. I'm not judging anyone for their choices. It just is what it is. But I'd really prefer it if people wrapped their heads around this rather than thinking it's somehow ok for them to pass comment.

It's frustrating and really became something of a wedge. I feel like I couldn't participate in the group fully.

I genuinely don't think there was malice. It was just somewhat thoughtless.

@Whiskeyandkittens I’d love to try weight training but I wouldn’t know where to start. Find it a bit intimidating. Do you workout at home, with videos or do you need to go to the gym and work with a PT?

I'm 5ft 1.5 and always used to be 7st to 7st 4lb. Had to eat loads to keep my weight up until I hit my mid 30s whe the weight started to creep up. Now at 61 it's getting out of control. I moved from an active retail job to a desk job and I have bad snacking habits which I can't seem to break, and am currently around 8st 9lb. I want to get back to between 7st 10 and 8st ready for a holiday to celebratemy 40th wedding anniversary. I haven't tried intermittent fasting, but I'm not sure how that would work when my weekdays starts at 5.30am.

@ACuppaAlwaysHelps thank you so much for starting this thread, sorry to only be catching up now! It’s so nice to be in the company of people who understand.

I’m 40, 5’1 and weighed 119lbs this morning (sorry I don’t know kg). Two years ago I weighed about 108lbs which I was happy at. A mixture of perimenopause and a stressful couple of years has led to the weight gain, with not enough time spent taking care of myself.

This past month I have run almost every day, usually just over 5k which I do for headspace and because I enjoy it more than anything else but of course it helps with the step count. I’m trying to prioritise protein, aiming for approximately 100g a day. I really want to commit to regular strength training as I dip in and out of that. @Whiskeyandkittens i love hearing how well it has worked for you. I’m hoping weight training will give me my figure back. I think I’m less worried about the number on the scales than how I look in the mirror and how my clothes fit.