Refocus!

[Poisonwood]

Mid forties, huge issues with food all my life. Piled on loads of weight when I turned 40. I’ve been up and down the same two stones the last couple of years, and am at present at the very top end…feel so frumpy and definitely lost confidence. Am avoiding mirrors!
Overall I’d love to lose 4 stone, but as the title says I want to completely refocus so am going to concentrate on a pound off at a time.
I have to accept that I have appalling self control around any form of snacking, and I think that if I concentrate on a lot less of that and choose/eat my meals mindfully I should see an improvement.
I know I need to go right now and weigh myself, I’ve been avoiding that too!!

Anyone else want some support and accountability?

I never weighed myself (still havent) and went by clothes fitting. So don't feel you need to weigh yourself (unless you think it will help motivate you.
I started intermittent fasting to help my medical issues and realised that was making me feel better (which gave me the motivation to carry on). I'm an all or nothing person so stopped buying snacks for the house that i like (therefore don't eat them). I added calorie counting and meal planning in to make sure I didn't go off plan. I'm happy to count my calories over the week so if I go over one day that is not a failure, I will just have lower calories the next few days. I've seen it more as a way of long term eating than a diet which has really helped me continue and maintain (because I'm eating the same meals as my family just counting the calories I'm not making it hard for myself or making myself feel different).
I started off as size16/14, at 5ft1 I'm now a size 6 and happily maintaining. I think the reason it worked for me was it was maintainable long term, and I'd framed it in my head as not a diet but along term way of eating. You need to find that long term plan that works for you, make a list of rules that are achievable and if you fail you start again there and then, don't wait till next Monday.

@Pilotingmyownlife Can I ask how many calories per day you eat now? I'm a similar height to you and only need to lose around 7-10 pounds, but I'm finding it impossible to lose (I think being short doesn't help!).

14 stone 8.2lbs

Okay.

Positive mindset and determination time!!

Have made up some sweet potato and lentil soup for lunches for the next few days, and dinners will be veg-heavy, I’m just not sure whether to have breakfasts (and if so, what?) or wait till lunchtime. I could alternate maybe.
No buying any biscuits or crisps or cakes.

No being short doesn't help! I was very shocked that my maintenance level was only 1400 calories (I'm disabled so no exercise, limited mobility so sedentary box). I did one of the calorie calculators to get a feel of what I needed. I ate about 1000 calories when dieting.

@Pilotingmyownlife thats a fantastic change, physically and mentally, well done you!!!
I have previously felt pretty good intermittent fasting which is why I’m considering two meals a day. I definitely agree it has to be long term, I really don’t want to spend the rest of my life in the yo-yo-ing I’ve been doing. New habits are achievable with perseverance.

Done welll today. Out for lunch but had a chilli jacket potato and salad. Drinking plenty. Bought some herbal teas to have in the evenings. Feeling very positive, even though I’ve had quite a stressful week, so definitely think I’m in the right frame of mind.
Tomorrow I’m going to start slowly building my steps up, have had to be sedentary recently so this is a big thing.

Soup for lunch. Not actually hungry for dinner but know I should eat something. Maybe vegetable curry.

I'll join to @Poisonwood...I could definitely do with some encouragement and accountability. My stress levels have been pretty high over the past few months and my way of coping is eating and drinking more. I'm also perimenopausal so have been feeling a few aches and pains, low energy and I get overwhelmed really easily so again my way of coping is eating and eating more!

I think overall I would love to lose a couple of stone, but I really need to break it down into small steps (see above about getting overwhelmed very easily!)

@CoffeeChocolateWine hello 👋

We have matching coping mechanisms for stress - when it’s coupled with the aches/pains/low energy/feelings of being overwhelmed it’s really hard isn’t it. But - not impossible!! Sometimes, I think the most helpful thing is not feeling alone with the problem, having others willing to give understanding and support.
Do you have any thoughts on ways to lose?

I'll join you too. I'm at the end of a very looooong weight loss journey that's had a lot of yo-yo's up and down. I have been trying I reckon for 2 years to lose the last 10lbs/stone but I weigh the same now as I did then. I wonder if perhaps I need to resign myself to this being my weight, but I'm not happy in myself here, I'm on the cusp of overweight (ie bmi is 24.5 on my heaviest day) and I know I have a bit to lose, and to be honest, I feel like I should and could lose it. The reality is I just eat too much. My portions are massive and I have a terrible sweet tooth and could easily eat 5/600 calories in a day of sweets/biscuits etc if they are here. I also drink wine a couple of times a week.

And, on the flip side, I can cut alcohol and sugar out completely if I'm in the right mindset. I exercise daily and I'm training for a marathon, I enjoy healthy food, I cook every day. There's no excuse. I just find myself eating the wrong things. I have always lost weight very slowly and it's even slower now I'm on HRT so I'm feeling very demotivated and just need a kick up the bum really.

I had a lot of success post-lockdowns with cutting right back on carbs, although not cutting them out completely. I lost about 3 stone in 2021 and managed to maintain it for a couple of years, but 2 of those stone have crept back on.

I'd love to think I could do it again, but for me, a positive mindset is everything and that really is a challenge at the moment, and doubly so with peri-menopause chucked it too.

That's why I feel like I need to break it down into bite size chunks and celebrate small wins which will probably help with the positive mindset.

Key for me this week will be drinking plenty of water and that really helps keep the hunger at bay too.

@thenewaveragebear1983 consider it kicked!! Training for marathon is awesome. Could you maybe do some small changes for a while - no biscuits or a smaller glass of wine? Or use smaller plates?

@CoffeeChocolateWine I definitely drink more water when I put sliced lemons or limes or cucumber in it.

Making beef casserole for dinner, with veg and mash. Lunch is probably going to be a toastie. Bit carb heavy but feel quite chilled as weather has cooled quite drastically. Not snacking at all should mean I can eat pretty much whatever I want for meals - here’s hoping anyway!!

@Poisonwood Snap with the dinner, I made the casserole yesterday so should be yummy today. I wont be taking mash though, just boiled, can mash them into the gravy

Its little tweaks like that that help me keep to the straight and narrow. Casserole is rich enough, I dont need to be adding milk and butter, so I save those calories because like @Pilotingmyownlife , my maintenance calorie allowance is less then 1400 and trying to keep a varied , healthy balanced diet on so few, means I shave off those I can, where I can

I also drink like a fish so need to count for that. Had to give up wine, I can have 2 spirits with a slimline for less then a small glass of wine

I also get my steps in, around 15 to 25k a day although I do have the odd day, like today where I dont shift my bum, Im not a saint

Mostly I have to meal plan, I have to know what Im going to be eating so that I can make sure Im getting enough veg and protein in me. DH is home today so he will be wanting toasties, I try to avoid the bread as a rule as I dont find it fills me and its too easy down the neck so for me my toastie will be baked beans, chopped ham and a small amount of cheese , the beans will fill me, one sandwich will fill me. If it was just a plain cheese toastie Id demolish a block of cheese and will be wanting two and will still probably be picking before dinner.

For me it really is all about planing meals and not just opening the fridge or cupboard and thinking, nothing there I fancy and reaching for bread or crisps or biscuits

My other rule is, not to eat fingers to mouth food, use a knife and fork and a plate. Fingers to mouth eating, for me is mindless. Takes me 2 minutes to demolish a sandwich, turn that sandwich into a one slice open sandwich , eat with a knife and fork and its twice or three times as long. Im registering that I am eating, I chew it more, I take my time. Brain is registering Im eating. Fingers to mouth are the biscuits, the sweets, the junk that you pick up mindlessly and have swallowed before your brain kicks in

@suki1964 I actually did the spuds as boiled not mashed, thought it better for all of us (was only planning mash as I realised it’s been ages since I made any for the kids lol). I then only had one small potato, and plenty of side veg and small portion of casserole. Your knife and fork habit is a good one, definitely makes sense. I’m trying to consciously eat much slower than I instinctively do.

In bed with a Women’s Blend herbal tea. Moderate exercise today, and feel a bit achy but pleased I did it. Tomorrow I plan to have a swim and sauna, should help relax. Food wise I’m thinking tuna salad, and then herby oat-crumbed cod and roasted veg.

Checking in! Had a pretty good day yesterday for the most part. I just struggle with the afternoon energy slump and reached for a couple of biscuits. I think I need a strategy to get me through that! I drank lots of water though.

Today, I'm off to the gym this morning so will probably skip breakfast and then have an omelette with lots of veg for lunch. Having chicken goulash for dinner tonight. And will aim for a healthier snack!

@CoffeeChocolateWine banana and some nuts maybe? I’ve actually been enjoying a mid afternoon ice lolly with the kids - feel I’m getting a crunch without many calories at all lol. Not quite the same once the weather has turned maybe.

I’ve done well today, appetite has definitely dropped which is great. I’m daydreaming at odd moments about a wanted bathroom makeover rather than food, which is healthier for my waist if not my bank balance!

Monday I had a really good day, yesterday was a bit trickier- it's my one office day of the week and I always end up eating rubbish when I get home. I roughly calculated my calories and probably came in around 1700, so a bit over. I should be ok today as I'm back wfh. I'm not feeling great today, not ill, but I have a really stuffy head and weird congested ears. I overslept and missed the gym this morning (I do a bootcamp that starts at 7 on a weds). Just took the dog for a walk.

My food is all sorted today, I cooked a chicken yesterday so will have that with salad for lunch. We have a high school open evening tonight so dinner will be a frozen portion of leftovers so as long as I don't go wild I should be ok calorie wise today

Calorie counting is the way, even for a bit to see exactly what’s what. Check what your calorie goal is on the James Smith Academy free calculator: it’s the best

Lots of lean protein will fill you up for minimal calories but don’t cut out any food group.

up your daily steps,

Strength training is also great, especially for women, as you age.

Check out the Fitness Chef, Ben carpenter, and Jordan Syatt on their free socials for inspiration

Hello - joining you to refocus if that's ok?!

I lost 50 kg between Easter 2023 and Easter 2024. Woohoo....only it turns out maintaining is harder than losing and as of Monday this week I'm bloody up 8kg. Easy as that and I haven't even really gone back to old habits - just eaten a bit more. And I never really got to my goal in the first place!!

So I started my refocus on Monday at 76 kg. My target was always 65kg but wondering whether it needs to drop to 60kg. So I'm starting 12 weeks of the Fast 800 (loosely!) which will get me to Christmas.

Hope it's ok to join. I honestly feel like my weight has always ruled my life and I just can't get a handle on it - now in my early 50s!

@thenewaveragebear1983 I hope you’re feeling better now. How was the Open Evening?

@chalkyc2 welcome 👋

I think refocus at our age is a really positive thing, we still aren’t giving up and perseverance has to count for something! You’ve already done really well losing, and sound motivated, you’ve got this!

Today has been a quiet day, I was too busy with work to exercise but will make a point of a walk tomorrow. Had soup for lunch but other than that just herbal tea as wasn’t interested in anything else. Still run down from my bout of a virus a couple of weeks ago, think that’s playing a part too as I’m definitely not fully well yet.

Tomorrow I will make sure I have a full meal, thinking fish, sweet potato and veg.

Got the munchies right now. Having a bowl of popcorn and eating it slowly. First “snack” in 12 days. Think I’m maybe low on salt as also fancy a cup of Bovril.
Today has been a success. I’m sleeping well at the minute and have no digestive issues…definitely feeling better in my body. I am tired but that’s not a surprise as I am anaemic and have been for a while. Tomorrow will also be one meal, chicken casserole with broccoli and cauliflower.

I'm doing terribly. There's too much chocolate and sugar and things around, we have 2 birthdays this weekend so tomorrow I'm making a huge chocolate cake and a batch of cupcakes 🤦‍♀️ I start every day so well and descend into carnage

@thenewaveragebear1983 two birthdays and baking cakes is very difficult food wise! Try not to feel bad.