Defeated by fatness no more

[BreathingDeep]

Happy Monday!

Following my thread last week about how I, and so many of us, are feeling like we're defeated by our weight, here's a support thread for those of us who don't want stop ourselves from living the lives we want any more.

There were some amazing stories shared and so much honesty about how this is a struggle for so many of us. Here's the thread for anyone wanting to read:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4225173-Defeated-by-my-fatness-am-I-alone

I know that I am sick of feeling ashamed of myself. Sick of hiding away. Sick of feeling that I'm judged for my weight. Sick of feeling that I'm letting myself and my family down. Sick of feeling that my inside doesn't match the outside. Sick of living in the same few outfits because everything else is too tight or looks terrible. Sick of seeking solace in food that doesn't nourish me. Sick of treating myself badly.

If you feel the same, come and join us! Everyone will have their own journey, their own approach and that's fine - please, no criticism or judgement of anyone's plan. The main aim is that we all take steps, every single day, to make ourselves feel better about ourselves.

For me, that means today will include drinking water, taking a long lunch and having a dog walk with a friend (this NEVER happens because work always comes first) and sticking with my Cambridge plan.

How about you?

Morning. So sorry to hear your news breathing. It's been such a difficult year for so many, please be kind to yourself

I may have almost managed my first 24 hours of IF and low carb ! Miracles will never cease. I fasted yesterday morning until 1.30pm, slightly unintentionally. Had tuna salad with a few cubes of cheese for lunch and a handful of nuts later before chicken salad for dinner and strawberries and cream around 8.30pm. I'm going to shift it round today to the 12-8pm window. It was surprisingly manageable and I didn't feel hungry , nor was I really craving anything. I'm not hungry this morning but I am mentally missing something sweet and hot for breakfast. Here's hoping that I see some positive results and that will be the motivation to carry on. Stating what we all already know but really it's got to be a change in eating habits that you think you can sustain.

Sorry to hear that Breathing. I wouldn’t beat yourself up over losing the plot for a bit when something as upsetting as bereavement happens. You can pick yourself up when you’re ready

Just realised I’ve ruined my IF today with a throat lozenge 🙄. My cold has turned to a tickly throat, and I have to keep drinking or sucking a lozenge to stop coughing. Not covid though 👍🏻 (had that over Christmas, fun times). I feel generally much better today, though I’ve slept badly as last night I thought I’d messed something big up at work (I think there’s a way round it today though, phew!)

Overall, the food side is going well but still no opportunity to exercise, work has been so fierce. I’m off on Friday though and heading out to walk with a friend.

Have a good day, everyone

So sorry to hear of your loss @BreathingDeep, I hope you and your family are doing ok in the circumstances.

I've had a bit of a set back with my running as I am having real problems with my calves cramping up and giving me pins and needles/numbness in my feet. But instead of just giving up I have booked an appointment with a sports physio to hopefully get it sorted so I can continue (Me! At a sports physio!! Hope they don't laugh me out of the place!). I think I'll be able to keep going in the meantime, but just need to take it easy.

@BreathingDeep sorry to hear your news.

Just be kind to yourself at the moment and do what you can, without guilt.

So sorry for your loss @BreathingDeep.

Please don't be self-flagellating about whatever you need to do to handle the grief. It's natural that those of us who love food would take comfort from overeating in times of distress. It doesn't mean disaster or failure.

I try to tell myself now that there is no bloody wagon, and thinking about it as something that one is either on or off is not helpful, because it's not zero-sum. One day, a few days, a week of overeating will not undo everything else we've achieved. Everyone has their vices and challenges that they are burdened with - ours unfortunately has very visible consequences!

Self-care can take many forms - sometimes it's being healthy and getting exercise, sometimes it's comfort eating. As long as we get the balance right between these (so that most of the time we're doing the former), we're winning.

I find a good way to get back into the healthy self-care mode is to have a day of doing things that make me feel instantly good about myself - have a long bath, style my hair, epilate and moisturise my legs, do my nails, pluck eyebrows, face mask. Change the sheets and enjoy some crisp, fresh ones and a good night's sleep. I also like to write to old friends on days like that - it's so cheering.

Going straight from binge mode to diet-and-exercise mode is too big a leap, but after a day of "pampering" (I hate that word for some reason), I'm usually ready.

So agree with the self pampering.

My indulgence is slightly more expensive face masks for my skin. I used to have the odd facial before covid, now can't, so I do it myself, save money and feel better for it.

And I give myself a pedicure too.

Much love coming to you @BreathingDeep - just concentrate on you at the moment. The whole point of this thread I think is kindness for those of us that have struggled for years with their weight, and it's not going to be sorted in a few weeks. I agree with a PP that the all or nothing approach is what has got us all here! Burn the wagon!

My indulgence is charity shops. I am obsessed!

I can't do low carb. It really affects my mood! Hats off to those of you that are doing it as it is such a healthy way to live.

I'm nearly at my first mini target of 13 st. All going well so far, just need to sustain it!

Morning everyone. Hope your Thursday is looking good.
So day 2 on low carb/16:8 went well. I ate at 1pm and felt satisfied rather than full all the way through to 7pm when I ate again. I'm not having any cravings as yet. It's been a bit difficult in the morning to break the entrenched mind set of school run then home to toast and coffee but I am distracting myself by cracking on with jobs around the house etc.
In reality I don't know exactly how low carb I am being but I've avoided all bread/pasta and potatoes. No chocolate or sweets, in fact no snacking which is amazing. But I am on day 3 so a long way to go ! I've focused on plenty of protein and lots of salad. My weight has been bobbling around in the same +/- 7lbs in the last few months so not yet back to the lowest I have been but overall currently -4lbs since I joined this thread.

Today not so good for me. Was due to do Run2 wk3 C25K but could not get to sleep last night, and rather than barely do it and feel awful, I'm leaving it until tomorrow.
And tonight I'm going to a friend's... it will be glass of wine and crisps I know it will.

But don't we all have to learn how to cope with situations like this... I'm not snacking and I'm having much healthier meals and my DH declared one of my lowfat meals last night as 'one of his favourites'.

Sounds like things are moving in the right direction @Peachypips78 and @Onesmallstep67! I'm not too hopeful for weight loss this week because I think hormones will get in the way, but such is life!

Have a good night out tonight @rousette! Enjoy the crisps and wine without guilt, and get back to it tomorrow. We've got to allow ourselves the odd treat for it to be sustainable!

Oh and you must share your delicious low fat recipe!

Yes, you're totally right. I'm more likely to fail if I can't indulge a little bit!

Here is recipe.. we like spicy food, so it hit the right note. So quick and easy to do as well

www.deliciousmagazine.co.uk/recipes/30-minute-chicken-and-cauliflower-curry/

Well Thursday is my weigh in day. I'm another half kilo down (so at 78.5 now) and another cm off my waist.

I'm trying to get my waist measurement to less than half my height, as apparently that's the magic ratio for avoiding (or in my case, hopefully reversing) insulin resistance. The NHS is more absolutist about it and says my waist must be less than 32", but that seems a bit prescriptive to me, given my build. Half your height seems more natural, but I don't know if I'm kidding myself. Does anyone know more about this stuff on here?

I'm a bit frustrated by the slower progress after I was losing a kilo a week at first, but at least it's all going down. It's been half a kilo and 1cm a week for a while now.

I've also done two HIIT workouts and a yoga session this week, plus a load of mindfulness meditations (getting my money's worth out of the Down Dog subscription!). I'm hoping the additional exercise will kick start things again.

Oh and according to the health app on my phone, my BMI is now 25.93. Getting closer!

Sounding good Leadbetter

2lbs a week loss would be soooo much more encouraging, I agree. I'm a pound or a pound and a half... weigh in tomorrow though, so who knows

It can be frustrating when it slows down a bit. I am only 5ft and sometimes I only lose half a lb per week or don't lose at all. But losing inches around your waist is brilliant. My BMI is 29.1 at the moment, so just sneaking out of the obese category. I know it is quite an arbitrary figure and doesn't mean too much in the real world, but getting down to a normal BMI would feel like a real achievement

Well 12 years or so ago my BMI was 34...it's been hovering between 29 and 30 for the last ten years. Until last year really.

I'm really quite angry with myself at the moment, for what I've done to my body over the years. I'm 40 in the autumn, I really hope it's not too late to undo some of the damage.

I feel the same @TheLeadbetterLife, although I am on more of an upward trend with my weight! I've just turned 40 and 10 years ago I was slim and really healthy, running half marathons just for fun. But since having kids I have completely let myself go and developed so many bad habits that I am now struggling to kick. I just don't understand why I didn't do something earlier. But it is never too late and each pound lost is one pound closer to being healthy.

Totally agree. I've never taken much notice of BMI although I should. I've just worked mine out... it's 28.7

Mines 28.9 went for my second run today though and feeling and moving much better

Mine is 36.6 . Just awful.

Let's keep going... I'm going for a run (jog) tomorrow. Tonight I've had 2 gin and tonics and crisps round at a friends. First time we've done this for god knows how long and I loved it.
But tomorrow is another day.

Well I’ve had the most godawful day, I feel utterly miserable. Work disaster, hours on the phone with useless call centres and had a blazing row with an arsehole mechanic who’s been lying to me about my car for months (long, tedious, insane story).

I hate people sometimes.

I managed to avoid guzzling wine and chocolate though, which would be my normal response. Tuna and avocado melt on spelt toast for dinner, followed by a square of dark chocolate.

Well done Lead... it's so easy to reach for the bad stuff. I can't keep chocolate in the house at all, I am incapable of just one square. That sounds pathetic doesn't it...

Weigh in today. Lost 1.5lbs which I was hoping to be 2lb as it would take me down below the dreaded 13st... onward and upward to next week!

Good luck everyone, we can do it!

Gosh leadbetter that's some restraint there ! i would probably have been face planted in a trifle !
Well done @Roussette, that's a great loss. Sounds like you had a wonderful evening with your friend, nothing better
I am down another lb from yesterday. the change in my regime seems to be having positive results although obviously only a few days in. The revelation has been the lack of cravings and not feeling hugely hungry at times. I'm really going to try to give this my best shot for as long as I can manage.
have a great Friday losers