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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

Original poster

I’ve lost 30lbs and nobody has noticed!

66 replies

CarlottaValdez · 29/12/2020 08:57

I’m not even upset really, more intrigued as to when people might say something. I’ve gone from BMI 36 to 30 so still lots to lose to be healthy weight but I’ve moved from obese to “just” overweight and dropped two dress sizes.

Literally one person has commented - a woman at work. DH hasn’t said anything, he must have noticed though!

Has anyone else had this? Yes

OP posts:
Original poster
CarlottaValdez · 29/12/2020 08:57

Sorry about the random yes at the end of the post!

OP posts:
MakeWorkYourNewFavourite · 29/12/2020 09:01

I've lost 20 kilos and nobody has noticed. Even I can't really tell. I've gone from morbidly obese to obese though. I still have 40 kilos to lose. I'm getting fed up, but it has to be done.

Original poster
CarlottaValdez · 29/12/2020 09:03

Yes I can’t really see it myself either I suppose to be fair. I notice things like dresses that pulled round the arms fit more comfortably and I’ve started to think “oh that’s a flattering photo” sometimes.

It’s weird though, I’d have thought 30lbs would make more of a difference!

OP posts:
Dozer · 29/12/2020 09:04

Congratulations on your weight loss. It’s a personal endeavour and brings benefits, so IME its best not to seek ‘support’ and ‘validation’ from others, except (for example) things like weight loss / fitness group(s) (in real life or online).

I think saying nothing is often simply an indicator that people are polite!

Some DHs avoid saying anything about weight, eg if it’s been a sensitive subject.

Whatliesbeneath707 · 29/12/2020 09:06

That's an amazing achievement OP. I think when you see someone on a daily basis (work, family etc) it's harder to notice the changes as they happen over time. I wonder if you met someone who you've not seen for a while, would they notice? I would think so. Over 2 stones is a lot! Don't let this put you off, you've done amazingly well. Your health will have improved and I bet you need lots of new smaller clothes! Celebrate the wins by treating yourself to something new to wear!

PurpleDaisies · 29/12/2020 09:08

Weight is a really awkward thing to comment on. People might think if they say you’ve lost weight, you’ll think they think they thought you were fat before. If you’re still wearing the same clothes, maybe that’s hiding how much you’ve really lost.

You’re doing amazingly. Keep going.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 29/12/2020 09:09

They noticed, but for some reason people don't want to mention weight!... When you are a woman... My husband lost half of what I did and everyone complimented him...😑
I learned to mention it (if I fancy pat on the back) and people then do "oh yeah! I wanted to ask. Great job! You look good!".

RaRaRasputinHardBastardToKill · 29/12/2020 09:10

I think it depends on how big you were in the first place. The bigger you are the bigger the weight loss needs to be for people to notice. I think also people say ‘you look well’ instead of ‘you’ve lost weight and you look better for it!!’ It’s tricky thing, sometimes praising weight loss can seem to imply
that you thought the person looked bad before they lost weight. I usually find 30lbs is enough for people to notice but I am short so probably more noticeable (serial yo yo dieter, now just gone completely to fat - must do something about it Sad). Anyway huge congratulations from me, I know what bloody horrible slog it is. 30lbs is a huge amount to lose, well done!

SchrodingersImmigrant · 29/12/2020 09:10

Oh and you think you can't tell.
I was moaning about barely any difference and then I remembered I took photo somewhere at the beginning, but ignored it after. So I took another one.
The difference was amazing!

PurpleDaisies · 29/12/2020 09:11

I think also people say ‘you look well’ instead of ‘you’ve lost weight and you look better for it!!’

Round here, “you look well” means “you’ve got really tubby”!

Butterflytown · 29/12/2020 09:11

I’ve lost 35lbs since the start of the year and only a couple of people have noticed (although tbf I don’t really see anyone in real life at the moment, and maybe it’s not so obvious over zoom!). If I do meet with a friend in the park I’m well wrapped up in a padded coat which probably hides it. I’ve gone from a bmi of 27 to 23.5. My post lady saw me the other day and said gosh you’ve lost weight which made me feel disproportionately pleased. It’s always nice to get compliments but remember you’ve done it for yourself and your own health. Well done on your achievement- it’s not easy and you should be proud of yourself.

Sarahandduck18 · 29/12/2020 09:15

Don’t lose momentum!

You are doing well so just keep going.

Do it for you. The one off high of someone noticing won’t last but the health benefits will.

Labobo · 29/12/2020 09:15

I think there's a size which average build people just see as 'fat' and it ranges from top end of overweight into obese. You may find that just 10lbs more will suddenly put you in the 'chubby' category in people's minds and they will all suddenly start commenting. I lost 10lbs and no one noticed. Then I lost 5 more and everyone started saying 'you are shrinking, you're tiny' (I'm not I'm still a good half stone over top end of healthy BMI but I now look more average build and have more shape.

candycane222 · 29/12/2020 09:15

I have avoided commenting on weight loss if I notice. At my /my friends age there is always the worry that they are ill, for one thing, and that's for them to share.

Also the only time I have lost weight personally was due to severe anxiety which I definitely did not want to discuss.

But yeah, I don't always notice- especially nowadays with no hugging

hamstersarse · 29/12/2020 09:18

People have been told never to comment on weight now.

I’m sure people notice but are too ‘polite’ to say

I blame the fat shaming crews for this

Well done on the loss....good for you!

islockdownoveryet · 29/12/2020 09:19

If your still wearing the same clothes and it's winter your probably wrapped up people don't notice .
I lost a bit of weight nobody noticed until in wore a pair of jeans and a top showing my figure more than covering it .
Dress for your shape and well done .

Ranald · 29/12/2020 09:19

@PurpleDaisies

I think also people say ‘you look well’ instead of ‘you’ve lost weight and you look better for it!!’

Round here, “you look well” means “you’ve got really tubby”!

Ha that's the same here but it's not meant unkindly or anything I don't think!

OP I think if anyone not just you has a lot to lose then people don't tend to notice as much if your weight loss has been steady/gradual and if you see them most days they get used to the size you become. It's when they haven't seen you for ages they notice! Well done on your achievement Smile

SilverOtter · 29/12/2020 09:20

Well done that's a fantastic weight loss!👏👏👏

Original poster
CarlottaValdez · 29/12/2020 09:22

Thank you for the kind words! I think the pp who said I’m still in the general fat category and a bit more might take me to chubby is maybe right.

I set myself a goal to get to the overweight band (which I was 30lbs over) which I’ve done. I think I thought it would feel more different than it does! I’m determined not to blow it all now anyway.

I’m going to try to do another 10lbs as my next goal and if I can do that I’ll buy some clothes in smaller sizes.

OP posts:
rottiemum88 · 29/12/2020 09:23

Honestly OP it's a great thing to be doing for your own health, so congrats for that. However 30lbs, which is roughly 2 stone, really isn't all that noticeable as a loss on most people, unless you're someone who loses a lot of weight in one place first e.g your face/stomach, which people really tend to notice. Otherwise you'll just look that bit smaller all over.

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 29/12/2020 09:26

It happens all of a sudden.

I didn’t tell anyone I was on a healthy eating / weight loss campaign, and I took it steadily.

No one noticed for 5 months and then suddenly everyone noticed / commented.

You have done really well. I found so much motivation from each week’s achievement.

Zebrasandfairytales · 29/12/2020 09:27

I’ve lost nearly five stone and people are only just noticing. My husband said he could tell after 3+ stone lost!

I think people don’t necessarily like to comment on weight, which I agree with. I also think for those that see you every day it is harder to notice a shift day to day but then when you see others who have not seen you in a while it’s more of a visual jump for them.

Either way, I’ve lost weight for me Nd my health - I actually find it a bit uncomfortable when people comment on it as I’m still not sure I agree with the concept of congratulating others on weightloss. I think I’m still acclimatising to being in a slightly smaller body and feel loyal to my former bigger self - who was also worthy of admiration and praise.

Also some people can be careless with their words, someone recently told me they could now see my face and my beauty. As if they couldn’t previously. That really hurt me as it was someone close to me. So I guess my point is sometimes people not commenting isn’t always a bad thing!

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 29/12/2020 09:29

Oh, and a big difference for me was introducing modest toning and strengthening exercise which really helped with my shape.

notacooldad · 29/12/2020 09:31

This happened to our manager.
She took control of her weight. Stopped moaning about it in fact didn't mention it all but went on her own journey if weight loss and health.
I think because we were with her everyday we didn't notice as much as if it was someone we see only once every 3 months or so.
She put some timehop pictures on face book from 18months ago and the difference is incredible.
Well done on your weight loss o.

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 29/12/2020 09:32

I think it is likely people have noticed but are not sure if you will be offended at the idea that they thought you were overweight before