Positive no shame weight loss?

[WatchOutLurkerAbout]

Ok, so hoping I'm not alone and can find someone with a similar mindset!

I am plus size, have been since I was about 18 (thanks alcohol lol). I'm learning to love my body, it is strong and sexy in my way. I'm fine with that, I can walk for miles and get up stairs so none of this skinny is healthier no matter mindset what here. It's been a long hard journey to begin to like my body and I don't want to suddenly undo all that.

However, I have to lose 4 stone in less than 5 months to start fertility treatment. I'm not doing the paid plans - been there done that got the overpriced cookbooks. I am watching my calories and putting in a lot more exercise and different types.

I want to do my best to stay positive, to actually keep learning to like my body etc. No guilt or shaming. Sooo is anyone in the same boat? Fancy chatting and helping each other through it?

I'm in. I need to drop a minimum of 1 stone, probably 2 (but I'll see how I get on with one first!)

The idea of restriction makes sets off my inner toddler and makes me want all the "banned" food, so I need to start with exercise. I've signed up to a class I loved before (circuits/hiit) and I'm going to start couch to 5k (I used to be able to run 10k) again. Once I'm on a better exercise pattern I'm far less likely to want junk or binge on whatever is to hand.

I don't want to start officially until the new year (another of my mind games, I have to really want this, plus I have a bad cold) but happy to chat until then

I should have said, I want to lose weight to be fitter and stronger and healthier for my dc. If I look better in jeans, that's a bonus, not a target.

@MotherForkinShirtBalls got to say loving the name

You're a stronger woman than me with circuits. They bring out my inner teenager with PE flashbacks and makes me way more stubborn than a toddler lol.

I started couch to 5k at the start of the year but had to stop as my husband started working away so I had no time to do it with work and a toddler on my own. I want to start again but scared of over doing it at the start. I'm picking up Pilates and swimming.

I know what you mean with the limiting yourself making you want it more. Definitely the same! I've got a big bag of mini maltesers and all sorts of treats within my calories and I'm still having sugar in my tea because sweetener is vile and I only have four or five cups a week. Just about balancing it out in other ways!

Also finally yes yes yes to being stronger and fitter rather than just skinny!

Eleanor Shellstrop is my spirit animal

Swimming is great, I really need to start again. I had a great routine last year but was it by a ridiculous run of injuries which made me strip off in a huff so I'll back on track from next week.

Pilates is hard! I like the circuit/hiit class as it pushes me really hard but it's over quickly. Unlike running which is so bloody tedious. But running has the benefit of being easy that I can throw on my gear and be out the door and not tied to a time for a session. A mix of all should keep me moving and motivated!

I binge watched good place but I'm way behind on the new series

Boo injuries suck! Hope that you're nice and healed up now.

Pilates is hard lol a lot people think it's easy but Christ it doesn't feel it. I'm in a special one for mums so there's pregnant women and women who've had kids and the instructor definitely pushes those of us who are post partum lol.

Ugh I really really really hate running but like you say it's relatively easy to start doing! I've got a HIIT app to use at home but my toddler has other ideas lol.

I've given myself Christmas and new year off dieting. I know I'd just feel worse missing out and end up feeling guilty and hating myself. I've not gone over board - my bloody stomach has shrunk so despite cooking for four hours I barely had any Christmas dinner or leftovers .

I'm also in, if I may? I need to lose about four stone. I've always been curvy - even when I was dancing competitively I was a 12 with boobs and hips - but I'm actually becoming uncomfortable for the first time.

I'm aiming to get on track in the new year (once all the Christmas cheese is gone!) by trying to rebalance my diet and up my veg content. I'll restart C25K once the kids go back to school, and I'm going to try and make myself a board so I can tap dance in my house without damaging the floor.

I have struggled a lot with depressed and anxiety in recent years so positivity is key for me too!

Morning ladies I am in! Exactly the same scenario OP I have to get 4.5 stone off by April to start Fertility treatment also. Have had a few days off over Christmas but back calorie counting before a weeks holiday starting New Year's Day. After that it's all systems go. Same as you not doing any paid plan just calories and upping my walking and home resistance workouts

Definitely welcome @CaptainCallisto and @K1ngmarbs!

Dancing sounds ace @CaptainCallisto I wish I had any rhythm at all. Id love to be able to dance. I know what you mean about being curvy! The women in my family are all willowy and tall and slim. I've got hips and boobs and never fit in. It took me a long time to accept my body was still healthy and beautiful.

@K1ngmarbs its a really hard target isn't it? I felt so floored when the consultant told me like I was failing and it was my fault. Luckily my husband is amazing and really helped me get my head straight and not allow me to punish myself. Have you got any apps or stuff at home you've used and liked?

Ffs sorry for the bold I've been on mumsnet nearly five years and it still doesn't always like me!

What's everyone up to tomorrow? I'm thinking I might go swimming and see if I can make it to 500m again - that's what I did last time. I know it's not much but I don't want to push myself too much and hurt myself and end up getting hurt or injured as I'm not strong enough yet. I'm still enjoying my Christmas food so not back to limiting my calories yet but determined to keep moving.

Oh I'm in!
3 stone to lose here.
I lost about a stone a year ago then put it back on.
Love swimming. Hate running!
Thinking of getting back into yoga, as I feel I need more strength in my body. Really need to stop drinking so much too 👍

Look up intuitive eating or mindful eating etc. About listening to your body and not overeating or emotional eating anymore but respecting your body and weight loss is a side effect rather than a goal iyswim

Hi @MotherOfAllChristmases I'm with you I hate running but can't deny it works it's my last go to if I need an extra shove if swimming and Pilates don't do it for me.

Have you tried Pilates if you like yoga?

Also yes I'm right there with you with stopping drinking so much lol. I'm doing pretty good cutting back but now my house looks like a chavvy off license with half a million half drunk bottles of booze

Ooh thanks @Isadora2007 I'll have a look. I'm refusing to deny myself things as that just doesn't work with me. I'm not a grazer but my portion sizes are definitely too big and I'm an emotional eater - any negative emotions and I eat like I'm getting ready to hibernate.

Mindfulness would be a good angle. Gifting to your body the additional health and fitness and stamina it will need to support a life. You can still love your body and the life it will support but see this as carving out a new space and additional strength for pregnancy.

I want to lose another 4 stone, having lost 7st 4lbs so far this year. Happy to join the support club, feeling a bit demotivated as my weight loss seems so slow at the moment.

I've been using the Nutri Check app and tracking everything I eat, every day.

I took the kids to the park for a walk today..it was about 3km and not remotely quick but better than sitting on the couch! I've agreed to do a park run with my sister tomorrow morning. I looked up my last park run time (a slow 35 minutes four years ago!) and i fear I'll be at least 10 minutes over that, which will be shit. Fuck it, I have to start somewhere with this and at least it's at her house so I won't know anyone

Cross posted with you ChequerBoard. That's an incredible weight loss, well done. The plateau is hard. Hopefully a new year and new start will help get you going again.

Yay go @MotherForkinShirtBalls !! You have to jump in and just start somewhere. Try not to beat yourself up tomorrow. Isn't there a tag line for park run something like it doesn't matter how long it takes you - everyone does 5k no matter what. Just be proud of yourself for getting and doing it. It's a goal of mine to get to that point even if I mainly jog and speed walk it. I can walk it no problem now but want to be better than that.

Hi @ChequerBoard ! Congrats on getting this far. Are you limiting calories or anything different? Have you been getting moving? Sorry being nosey I'm really keen to find new things to try that aren't just beating myself up and feeling guilty over every bite of food and afternoon on the sofa.

Thanks @Spacebowlisback it's honestly the best motivator for me having to work towards potentially getting another baby. I'm fighting the guilt that it's my fault all the time but getting better at it. Then there's the flip side of what if I do lose the weight and it's all for nothing. Trying not to go down that hole.

It’s tough. There were times TTC I felt really let down by my body and others when it feels like punishing is rewarding it. All the months I failed to conceive... such a complicated thing. I know it might sound daft but I did a lot of positive visualisation and acupuncture - who knows if it worked but I felt more connected to my body.

I need to practice kindness to my body too. I spent my life hating it but six years of breastfeeding and three kids and recovery from sepsis and I owe it so much. I might keep up with your journey if that’s okay.

Count me in too please!
Need to lose at least 3 stone to get in to a healthy BMI, but mostly want to up my fitness so I can keep up with my DS, who is about to start walking.
I lost 5 stone 3 years ago, put about half a stone on in a year (so not too bad) afterwards.
Then got pregnant and spent 9 months on maternity leave eating too many biscuits so am now 2 stone heavier than I was and I want to get back there and go a bit further) focus more on the fitness side.

Of course it is! I get what you mean about learning to like and appreciate your body. I'm not surrounded by "healthy" people in terms of body appreciation. Family, colleagues and friends are mostly if not completely obsessed with being thin whether that's healthy or not. Body's are disgusting if bigger and need to be broken to be fixed into thinness. It's taken me a long time to accept and like my body. My husband is amazing and helps me see my body as he does. But it's a long road with a lot of pitfalls. I don't want to fall into one of those and end up hating myself because I can't get "thin" fast. That's why I want to focus on fit and strong and hopefully that will lead to decent WeightLoss.

Hi @Wingingitsince2018 ! My son is two and I swear nothing I do would help me keep up with him. I swear he runs on solar power! Also mmmm biscuits. I think Chew Chew I'm Hey Duggee is my spirit animal.

I’m the same. I want to be healthier but I don’t want to do it by shaming myself into it. That way madness lies.

Thanks &Watchoutlurkerabout, I have been low carbing (20g a day) but also keep a limit in my calories so I don't go overboard. I've eaten a lot of raw veg salads and lots of omelettes lol. But it works for me as I don't really feel hungry and don't have sweet cravings.

I don't do any formal exercise but am moving about a lot more than I was when I started. Having dropped 5 dress sizes I sold a lot of my old clothes on eBay and made enough to buy myself an Apple Watch so I can track my steps and link them to my calorie counting app. That felt like progress!

I'm off to the US in a week's time for a training course. Bit anxious about how I will manage the low carbing when I'm there but feel positive than I'm going - really couldn't have faced the 11 hour flight this time last year.

@watchoutlurkerabout he is all already exhausting me and he is only crawling and pulling up!

I am usually 'bad' with food because of convenience, so have decided to have a day tomorrow cooking things for the freezer. Not planning on doing super healthy stuff, just Bolognese etc but hopefully will stop me ordering take away!