I'm literally killing myself and I don't know what to fo

[IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece]

Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck (I could go on for a while!)

I've always been very overweight even as a teen (not my parents fault...I was a sneaky twat) but I currently weigh 25st...TWENTY FUCKING FIVE

I'm amazingly good at burying my head in the sand and saying I'm fine and I'll do something and I never do so I say it to myself again but it's suddenly occurred to me (told you, I bury my head in the sand) that I'm literally killing myself and this weight will kill me.

I'm absolutely fucking petrified and I don't know what to do

I hope you're still around op
Please try not to let it go; you're only young. Don't let your life slip past, on hold until you lose weight... I did a LOT of that. I'm 50 now and for various reasons have started the Newcastle Diet to reverse my diabetes and lose 4.5 stone of dead weight. Already I can see signs of a thin person in there and I want to cry for all the fucking years that I have hated my body and myself. I'm logging it in the diabetes section of mn, if you fancy a look.

Either way come back op. We all know how hard it is. We know you'll have failures along the way. We know how hard it is to actually get started No one will be waiting to have a go at you. We just want to support you.

Yes exactly please don't worry that people will be cross with you if you haven't made any changes yet. We KNOW how hard it is, we really do!

These things take time, even when you have that wake up call it's not easy to suddenly act on it.

Baby steps

Just to say I've not disappeared, things are just a bit crap right now and my head isn't in the right mind right now x

No worries lego look after yourself, sorry things are crap

I've been trying to lose weight for years - lose it and then put it back on plus more. Have been watching loads of stuff on You Tube - have learnt:-

1 Any food from plants are carbohydrates. They all get broken down to glucose. The body produces insulin to allow the glucose to enter the liver and muscles to be able to use it as energy. Everyone knows the excess glucose has to get converted to fat to be stored.
2 Problem is insulin 'locks' the fat cells. Your body can't use it's fat whilst it's in your blood. It takes 3 hours for insulin to leave your system.
If you want to lose fat you have to leave a longer than 3 hour gap between carbs including fruit and veg. A better snack is protein, especially meat and nuts. Try having some cut up ham/ chicken or eggs - really excellent food.

Sorry if you already knew this but it blew my mind that insulin locks your fat cells so my excercise straight after a banana etc. is alot less effective.
I'm sure an expert might know better and will correct me if I'm wrong.

Have you considered Slimming World (SW)?
It's less of a diet, more of a change in how you eat.

We've got a lady at our group who has lost 5.5 stone in under a year, and lots of others who have lost 3+ stone in the same time.

Iceland stock frozen Slimming World ready meals (I like the meatballs), and some new chilled ones now too I think.

I'm pretty sure that there are some Subway salads which are free on SW, which means you could eat as many as it would take to fill you up, and hopefully then you might be able to resist the snacks (I say might, not will, as I know myself how hard it is to eat the "right" foods and avoid the "wrong" foods)

Ok. I'm back.

I've still got no idea what to do and I've right royally fucked it all up this last 2 weeks food wise but I'm back so that's a start, right!?

Hi lego - I'd personally recommend Slimming World too. I started in November last year and have lost over 5 stone to date. Still in the obese section of the bmi chart (I actually whooped the day I was no longer classed as morbidly obese!) but have gone down 5 sizes and feeling so much better. I'm a bit older than you so the threat to my health was very real.
I believe you have to be in the right frame of mind mentally in order to lose weight. It sounds like you've had an epiphany which is so important to start with. Remember that it's taken years to put the weight on and will take a while to get it off again. Do you have anyone who'd support you? I've found it easier this time because my husband has been doing it with me.

Hi Lego,

Glad to see you back and facing your challenge. You can't undo the choices you've made up to this point and please don't berate yourself, it may send you into a spiral and back to comfort eating. I've found it really useful to 'out' myself to anyone and everyone, it has helped me stay on track and also recruit as much help and support as you can. Make plans with friends to go for a walk, take a friend shopping with you to help with good choices. I've found it's made me more accountable. GP may be a good start too.

I'm not a big fan of the organsied diet industry, particularly WW it often strikes me that they offer substitutes that replicate what you'd rather be eating but they are packed with so much sugar and dodgy ingredients. May be better to start making dietary changes that will stand you well in the longterm - I know, much easier said than done.

Lots of luck to you, don't give up because you are still young and can definitely turn things around. Would also recommend counseling if you can, so much of how we eat is emotional. The more tools in your kit the better.x

The one thing I've found worked for me (busy life which it sounds like yours is) is to have meals that took a long time to eat.

I found when working long hours I'd stuff myself full of the carby foods that gave me a quick rush iyswim?

The systema salad boxes you can buy are great and hold quite a lot. I do mine with meat (chicken or gammon) and the protein keeps me going.

I find bananas are best fruit for filling me up.

You can do this. Things happen and it's always easy to let things slide. But I know from your posts you'll do this

Hi Op,
Is there any reason why you have not considered asking your GP to put you forward for obesity surgery ? Are you aware that it is the ONLY method of successful weight loss that has long term measurable outcomes ? And that diet and exercise has very very poor long term results.
There is a huge amount of false and quite frankly hysterical bad mouthing of Bariatric surgery. It is of course quite possible to 'know someone' where it went wrong. In the exact same way it's possible to have complications from a tonsillectomy or an appendectomy. (Same complication rates) BUT for the morbidly obese it is literally a life saver with many people literally cured of type 2 diabetes in the recovery ward and most others in remission within a month.
The NHS will pay for it at the weight you are but most importantly they will also put you on a tier 3 weight loss program on the way to surgery which includes a medically supervised diet and essentially a psychologist...
Get educated about Weight loss surgery and don't believe those who tell you it's an 'easy' way out. It's not easy. It's bloody hard but nevertheless a bloody good tool that saved my sisters life. She was 23stone type 2 diabetic who could barely walk, was incontinent and filled with self loathing. After 6 months she was 13 stone and had discovered rowing !!
A year later she is transformed - physically she is fit and 11 stone. Mentally she is unrecognisable. Her confidence is sky high (despite inevitable baggy skin on boobs - which no one can see except her DH who is just so happy she is happy at last)
She had 3 days pain when she came round. Nothing after that.

Google Dr Rachel Batterham of the UCL obesity research centre and watch her documentary on how prejudice has prevented the clinically obese in being guilt tripped in to not getting the treatment they are entitled too.

Hi lego how are you doing? Keep coming back, as often as it takes. Keep persevering until the good days outweigh the bad days. Bad days aren't a reason to stop in their own right.

OP I would really encourage you to join some kind of structured program like Weightwatchers, Slimming World or a gym that offers a weight loss program. I am doing one right now where I have a session with a personal trainer 3 times a week, I see a dietician once a week, a doctor gave me a complete check up and "wake up call" before I started, outlining the risks to my health if I didn't change and I see a counselor for the emotional side twice a month - this is all part of the program. There is also a group meeting once a week. All the support is so great for making me feel cared for and knowing a team of people want to help me succeed. I also track food and use a fit bit to make sure I am active outside the gym.

It is a lifestyle overhaul and you need support to change your mindset, behaviors and habits.