First diet at 46, how to start changing habits?

[reawakeningambition]

Ex naturally slim person here. I only started gaining weight after having ds2 who is now 11.

My mum had a dreadful relationship with food/body image/diet etc and I don't want to go down that path. I've always had a very happy relationship with food (other than bad teeth due to sugar intake).

No idea what I weigh as dh has always struggled with weight so banned scales from the house. But I can't wear the clothes that suit me because my tummy is getting too big. It's gradually getting worse.

I tend to wake not hungry, eat breakfast anyway, make a nice lunch but eat too much of it and then it's all downhill from there really. Seconds, pudding, 4pm snack. No wonder I wake up not hungry!

In the past, the odd illness or period of toothache has been enough to get the weight off but not any more it seems....

Any thoughts?

Hi reawakeningambition I read somewhere that it takes up to 30 days to 'make a habit' so like giving up smoking, the first week might be difficult but then as the new habits become part of your life, it gets much easier.

I too want to lose some weight and I've never dieted before so here's what I think:

It's better if you don't think of it as a diet (which ends) but new eating habits that you are working into your life

Your diet sounds pretty good anyway (you make your own lunch for example and aside from too many puddings maybe and sugar)- as long as you stick to homemade and healthy real food ie not cooked chilled meals and loads of sugar and puds you should be ok with some tweaks rather than a complete rethink. If you had been brought up on frozen and ready meals you would have to rethink your entire attitude to food.

You say you're not hungry when you wake. Many people are not. Me included. So why not carry a banana and apple with you and have them mid-morning? Have a cuppa first thing. I'm not keen on herb tea but now I like raspberry tea and have one of those. Or a coffee and a banana. I have it with semi skinned milk - I hate black coffee. And skimmed milk.

If you really hate a food (I loathe tofu. End of.) then try it but it you can't stand it - don't force yourself.

Eat your lunch more slowly and mindfully. Don't answer emails while you're doing it. And I know it sounds 'woo' but I've found putting your food on a slightly smaller plate - works. You still feel satisfied but not grumpy and swizzed the way you do on a big plate or eating from containers. Putting food on a plate and taking time to eat it makes it feel like a proper lunch break.

My rule with seconds (with anything really) is WAIT. If I'm still hungry after fifteen minutes - I have more. Not spooned from the container but again - put it on a plate. So it doesn't feel all furtive and guilty.

Also it takes a good fifteen minutes for your brain to reigster it wants more. Sometimes after 15 mins I do want more but usually I don't.

The key with me is don't BAN anything. That way madness lies.

Puddings - don't ban them. I just cut mine down to three a week instead of every day. And none of that low fat shit either (low fat puds are packed with sugar). I love ice cream and cheese! So I would have two scoops of my fave ice cream on Mondays/Fridays and Sundays.

If I desperately wanted pudding during the other days - I would wait for 15 minutes and then have few scoops of sorbet. That satisfied my craving. If I still wanted ice cream I'd have a few scoops. And eat it slowly. Sometimes I'd have a piece of cheese instead. Again - it's about not banning.

Same with crisps. I like crisps. If I wanted them I'd have a small packet (some packets are huge. I'd get the multipacks of kettle crisps and have a small pack)

After a week I've lost 2 pounds. I also do 2 yogas a week and one aerobic class. I like doing those classes so find something you like - walking regularly is fine. I was surprised and expected to lose about a pound. It may well slow down now. I think the key is to lose weight slowly.

Oh and alcohol. I have colitis so am careful with alcohol anyway - it's not an issue. But I have about three glasses of wine a week so not much.

I drink about 1.5 litres of tap water a day as well.

So my guidelines ( I don't like to call them rules)

Have a drink in the mornings and have some fruit mid morning.

Eat mindfully and slowly. Eat on a proper plate.

If you want something - wait 15 minutes and then have it.

Don't ban any food stuff but wait for 15 minutes before having it.

Personally I don't weigh myself everyday but once or twice a week.

Eat real food (that could be a baked potato!) but not processed.

Don't punish yourself. If you slip up - start again the next day.

Think of it as rethinking your food - not A Diet. Remember it's a huge mulit-billion business which relies on your failing and redoing it again and again and again. There is no one size fits all.

Let me know how you're getting on!

Hugs
xxxx

Cut out or at least down on carbs, honestly it's amazing what a difference it makes. I've lost nearly half a stone in just over a month and I have been eating loads!! I eat dark chocolate every day, and have the odd glass of wine but no carbs.. It's really not as hard as you would think.

I don't think it's going to be difficult for you to sort this out. I am also a naturally slim person who has had a couple of phases of podge (first on starting university, second on moving abroad and in with DH). My advice would be to try to be really old school and eat three healthy well-balanced meals a day with lots of fruit and veg. Maybe a small pre-planned dessert or treat after dinner. But otherwise absolutely no snacks, no 4pm biscuits, no second helpings etc. You can probably have larger/ nicer meals than you're having at present, it just takes a bit of planning, and maybe spending a bit more on food (e.g. try a big bowl of really nice strawberries and raspberries for breakfast followed by some oat bran made with milk and sweetened to taste; with lunch have some delicious crudités and guacamole to bulk out some soup or a sandwich; have a small portion of something rich after dinner, like expensive dark chocolate), or one glass of really good red wine. I also think vey helpful for the metabolism to eat at exactly the same times every day, and to allow yourself to be pleasantly hungry but not starving before each meal.

If you find the snacking habit hard to break, then sugar free gum can be a good thing to carry round.

Once you are a bit slimmer (agree good not to weigh yourself) you can adopt a more modified version of the plan that allows for occasional mid-afternoon cake, a bit more to drink at weekends etc.

Read "How not to Die" and start thinking about food as fuel. I now feel happier when I eat healthy food because I know I am doing my body good.

Why not start the 5 : 2 diet, as I did today? The only one I feel works (on me) (if I follow through) and the only one that is not difficult. It could perhaps fit your dh as well. You son could top up with pasta or his favourite foods on the days you two don't eat all that much, pre-made pancakes with cream, or pre-made mincemeat sauce with pasta, or a pizza slice, or whatever. Obviously it's not a good idea for you two to 'cook', at least not in the beginning.

Thanks for this good advice everyone.