I need serious help, we're talking 6st or more weightloss. HELP PLEASE

[Skullyton]

i have no idea where to start.

my eating is shot and i have a hip/back problem (not weight related but weight not helping iyswim) which means my exercising options are limited.

I need a decent, affordable and maintainable diet plan. (and i dont do clubs so slimming world/ww isn't going to happen)
I need an exercise programme.

I HAVE to get this goddam weight off.

Current average food day goes.
9.30am cup of coffee
12pm Cup of tea & 4 biscuits. (sometimes, not every day)
2pm - Sandwich, bag of crisps & a mars bar or similar (Not always, sometimes don't eat here either)
6pm Main meal, usually pasta or carb based.
8pm snacks. (icecream or chocolate bar)

I know i need to start forcing myself to eat in the mornings (food makes me feel sick before 10am and i'm usually doing something by then that keeps me out for the day) and i know i need to cut out the 8pm snacking.

i know i need to drink more water, its usually less than 1ltr a day.

What else can i do? I have been cutting down my evening meal portions.

Then to the exercise. I have something going on with my lumbar spine and right hip thats causing me a lot of pain, Physio says gentle exercise is fine, like swimming and walking and yoga.. but i need to find some way to use these to be effective.

So.. weighloss gurus. halp?

Hiya, can you be more specific about what you eat? Calorie wise your day doesn't look to me to be that bad. I eat more than that and I'm top end of healthy weight.

You could track everything for a week or so to see where the problems are?

Take a look at the 5:2 threads, seriously! I started in september and have lost more than 2 stone already, I have another 5 or so to get to a healthy weight, but its like a switch has flipped in my brain and I can see myself reaching that healthy weight for the first time in 13 years!

Firstly - if you don't need to eat, don't force yourself. Listen to your body. Plenty of slim people skip breakfast, you do what suits you best.

Start by cutting out all crap: no sweets, crisps, choc, biscuits. If you need to snack, do it on a small handful of nuts or seeds, some yoghurt with berries, hummus and raw veggies. But try not to snack. Your ultimate goal is NO SNACKING EVER because snacking keeps your insulin levels raised > you're hungry quicker > vicious circle.

Increase the protein in your diet: plan meals around lean meat, fish, eggs, some cheese (not loads), pulses. Measure your pasta, rice, couscous etc: 60g is plenty for most people (DH and I both have 60g, I'm 5'3" and he's 6'2". He just has more protein and veg.

Exercise: start by walking. Set yourself the target of walking for 30mins each day. Time yourself and aim to beat your time the next day. Get a Fitbit if you can afford it - they are incredibly motivating.

If you don't like plans you need to make small, sustainable changes on your own first. Do lots of research into other ways of eating: 5:2, low carb, whatever. These tend to be ways of eating for life, not just a diet. When you're ready, choose the one that's right for you to enable you to change your eating habits forever.

Good luck

typical meals are
chicken & mushroom slice with oven chips
Lasagne (made with jar sauces)
Pasta bake
spag bol.
Mushroom, Cherry Tomato and Asparagus with pasta and cheese sauce.
sausage and mash, roast dinner, beef stew or cottage pie (home made all from scratch)
we have a chinese once a week on a friday.

lunch time its usually cheese and crackers or toasted tea cakes with clover light on.

breakfast, when i do eat it, is either a couple of slices of toast or a bowl of cereal or porridge.

I did track for a while with a fitbit and my calorie intake is ok, usually about 1500 a day.

my issue is the evening snacking and chocolate habit, which is stopping.. i have to treat that stuff like cigarettes and cut it out dead!

i ought to add in some of its because i dont sleep, and i know there is correlation between sleep deprivation and weight gain, but my oldest has autism so i run on 4hrs sleep most days... not great for the motivation when i'm shattered! :(

It sounds like your meals are very carb heavy indeed, which will make you retain water. Carbs are fine - but you need to measure them. I've recently lost 2st and still count all my carb portions. It's too easy to overdo them.
I have no advice on the sleep though. That sounds really tough

You've got a lot on your plate, and I know you want to lose the weight RIGHT NOW! but I think you would be best off making little, maintainable changes that will add up over time, rather then doing drastic changes for quick weight loss.

First off, try cutting out the crap. No more biscuits for breakfast, no more crisps and chocolate bars at lunch. Try and find something healthy to replace them with. You don't have to eat breakfast if you aren't hungry, but when you do get hungry focus on having a meal with a bit of protein, a good portion of veg (preferably not potatoes), and a bit of carb. Try snacking on fruit and veg, or even a SMALL amount of nuts.

Once you've got yourself into this routine (and you will fall off the wagon, don't beat yourself up, just climb back up and tell yourself you will do better), then look at adding in exercise. Start slow, walking, etc.

Look at trying to go a solid 30 days with a new eating or exercise regime before you add something else to your plate.

Eventually, if you stick with new changes you will start to lose weight.

And do try and get some more sleep. Even if it means going to sleep when your DS does.

it is carb heavy, mostly because pasta & potato is what my son will eat (restricted eater) so i've been trying portion control on my part. I probably eat about a childs plate full.

its little enough that DH bugs me about not eating enough, but i've tried explaining i'm not active, i dont do a physical job like him.. i don't need to eat the same as he does! He's a bit of a feeder, i was a size 16 when i met him, was a size 22 by the time we married, and 10yrs on i'm now a size 26.

it HAS to stop.

My DS is very picky. At the moment I throw on a pot of pasta for him, while I cook the main meal for everyone else. Or I make roast potatoes for him and make sure I make extra to put in the fridge, so I don't have to make a meal focused around his eating.

You sound a lot like me OP! I think the trick is to find the diet you could conceivably stay with forever if it came down to it. Juicing is the one for me, I'm actually enjoying it. High protein didn't work for me because I'm squeamish about some meat and fish and I hate eggs, but it would be a good diet for someone who is a meat lover! If you like carbs look up high carb diets. Ultimately, they all work. You've just got to find the one that works best for you.

I've lost 5 stone doing slimming world (which i know you feel isn't for you). I'm also sleep deprived with an autistic DS and love my carbs. It can be done whilst eating carbs. It can be done by avoiding them. Something as you say needs to change for change to happen.

My typical day includes two carb based meals something like jacket potato with beans for lunch and pasta with sauce for tea. A lot of shop bought sauces are quite sugar/ fat heavy so I batch cook a simple tomato pasata, onion, veg stock and herb sauce that i use as a base to add meat to or enjoy without for a lighter meal.

Mashed potato is again something we eat often (DS loves sausages and smash). I now go for extra low fat sausages for me.

Roasts are great food especially if the fat is sprayed on par boiled potatos rather than poured or they're tossed in a bag with just a tablespoon of oil to coat.

I avoid bread, pizza and pastry because they're really high in sugar/ fat and bread deffinately doesn't fill me up so its empty calories. Thats the thing thats made the biggest difference to me.

I enjoy plenty of chocolate still but i freeze curly whirly bars (makes them last longer) and they're half the calories or 1/3 of a mars bar depending on size.

I still enjoy my crisps but i go for hoola hoop puffs (70ish cals) rather than a walkers grab bag which i think are approaching 200cals.

I eat lots of fruit and veg (not fruit juice though as i believe its high sugars). My digestive system works better if i keep my fruit/ veg levels up and they bulk up meals.

Cheese and milk I limit and tend to have either or.

Hi, I think it's helpful to realise that although you can (and will) make things better in time by modering your eating habits, you shouldn't feel guilty about putting on weight - it sounds like you're having a really difficult time, and not having enough sleep and being stressed both make gaining weight really easy. Be kind to yourself!

A low carb diet has really helped me lose weight after a hugely stressful time in my life, and has resulted in me not having cravings to speak of. It takes a while to adapt, but you could start off by slowly replacing snacks like biscuits for a slice of cheese or ham, or celery with pate etc and go on from there, perhaps? There's loads of info online and support on mumsnet too. The Diet Doctor site is useful - www.dietdoctor.com and, if you have time, John Briffa's book, Escape the Diet Trap, amongst others. I've tried intermittant fasting but find it too difficult - but it's great for some people.

*Little postscript to my comment above. Today I'm having heavy carb cravings, maybe sod's law for saying publicly that I was enjoying my diet!!

I'm going to have a jacket potato for dinner, maybe with tuna or beans, but it will be food diaried so that I don't suddenly run off the rails into the supermarket bakery section!

Hi there Skully
There is nothing magical about breakfast : if you are not hungry first thing then just have a big mug of tea
BUT
Snacking is the problem.

Try to eat ONLY at meal times.
Close the kitchen between and after meals.
Get your son to make a sign to go on the door "the kitchen is closed"

Why are you delaying lunch till 2pm?
Have a decent lunch at 12:30 - a large glass of water, a sandwich and a piece of fruit. Ditch the crisps and mars bar.

Main meal : drink a pint of water before it.
Reduce the carbs and increase your protein
and end the meal with a piece of fruit

and then close the kitchen after supper

That will head you on the right road.

One good tip I read is to make sure you always try to have veg with lunch and dinner every day - to focus on what you're adding to your diet instead of what you're trying to reduce - so a simple green salad with whatever lunch you have, and some steamed veg with dinner.