If you’ve lost a significant amount, are people treating you differently?

[threeeggsontoast]

I’ve lost 2.5 stone on MJ so far but as I’m short, it’s probably more noticeable. Even though I’ve still got a long way to go, just going from 16+ stone to 13.11 has meant I’m dressing more confidently, feeling more comfortable in my own skin and so much more. I feel like some people are treating me differently though. I don’t think I’m imagining it but it’s like there’s more respect - more men holding open doors, more people listening if I say something and, more friends going out of their way to suddenly have an opinion on my weight loss (some positive, some negative).

As you’ve morphed into a new body, have people started treating you differently?

I've lost three stone...it's unbelievable how much nicer are people to me. You are not imagining it. It's sad in some ways when you think about it.

I’ve lost 4 stone, gone from a size 18 to a size 10. I am struggling with maintenance and weigh a few pounds less than I want and I do worry colleagues are wondering if I am developing an eating disorder and I have had questions about whether I struggle to eat (I don’t) but I don’t know if I am projecting my own insecurities….never ends does it, used to feel judged when overweight, now feel judged for losing the weight!

Congratulations on your weight loss.

I’m only 5’ 1” and I’ve lost 5 and a half stone. No one treats me differently but I treat myself with more respect.

I’m glad I’m not imagining it! I’m honestly so used to being invisible that it’s really jarring.

Seven and a half stone down

Yes. People are so much nicer to me

Yes. I’ve lost 10st 7lbs so far, and just in general day to day interactions I can tell the difference. I get a lot more interaction and positive response than before. I think it’s a combination of being a normal weight and perhaps dressing in a way that’s more noticeable, rather than before when I dressed for comfort and to try to avoid attention.

I wonder if this happens for men too?

Also, do you think maybe after feeling better in your own skin op, that maybe you are putting out happier more friendly vibes?

Yes..I definitely think that’s part of it. At my earlier weight I just wanted to be hidden away but now, I’m less bothered and so by default I’m more confident. I guess people respond to that.

I haven't noticed any difference tbh, but I am slob and haven't changed how I dress! I'm just a skinny slob now :)

Whilst my weight loss was a side effect of my medication and no WLI I have experienced it

And tbh I don't like it! 😭

I've lost count of the random people I see daily in shops etc who keep telling me how I "look better/healthier" cos it seriously makes me question how fucking "bad/unhealthily" I apparently looked before!! 😬

I was always confident interpersonally, and my general demeanour hasn't changed but I think people are more likely to try to interact with me now and more likely to be a little bit friendlier.

There is a lot of research evidence to show that people who are obese or noticeably overweight are treated more negatively in lots of different ways, so it's not just a subjective thing. And I don't think it can all be ascribed to the individual ex-fat person being a bit more cheerful or confident.

Yes, but a lot of it is actually down to me having more confidence I imagine.

I’ve lost 3 stone since the end of May. People treat me differently, they see me now, not my obesity which unfortunately disgusts some people.

I’ve always been confident and outgoing, so people in general treat me the same when they interact with me. But I do get treated differently to an extent .

I get both men and women staring a lot now. Men are nicer to me, smiley, offer to help thay kind of thing, or they just eye me up and down. I’m a woman’s woman, but have noticed a couple of women feel quite off with me, but on the whole women are as nice as they ever were.

the new thing I guess is I get a lot of compliments, but from young women, generally on my clothes, waitressss, retail staff etc, a sort of approving thing. I find that quite affirming and quite sweet.

so no real negatives, I could do without the staring or the blokey behaviour, and really overall I guess to be expected as it’s an appearance thing.

I’m 2.5 stone down and not my husband and children have noticed. Everyone treats me the same I think.

Was size 18, am now size 10. Slim people are generally nicer. It's hard to define, there's just less... judgement? However, larger people are now more reserved. Maybe because I'm not big any more, so there isn't that shared solidarity.

My kids still joke about me being plump and squidgy, they don't seem to have noticed I am a different shape, and honestly I'm fine with that. (And to be fair, I am quite squidgy with all the loose skin and remaining wobbly bits)!

I put on 3 stone and people treat me like dirt compared to before. It’s so noticeable, some really talk down to me and are really rude. I never had that when I was slim, ever.

And also, why no one took the time to talk to you and ask how you were.

Not in my experience. I’m fed up of people treating me like I have a serious illness and telling me I’ve lost too much weight even though my bmi is now on the border of overweight/normal, not actually “normal” yet. People seem horrified I’m no longer the fat bloke.

18st to 9st.

May aswell be on a different planet now. Completely different experiences socially.

Sad really.

Please teach your children this is unacceptable. They should not grow up thinking it’s ok to joke about overweight people.

Gosh they're not pointing and laughing at people on the street! They cuddle up to me on the sofa and say "Mummy you're all squidgy I can use your tummy as a pillow", that sort of thing! They couldn't care less what shape I (or anyone else) is.

Yep. I look really good now, and about 80% more attractive so I am attracting more positive attention. That's human nature - it's not 'sad' it's just the way humans are. We pay more attention to people who attract us. Not talking about sexually, just aesthetically.

I’ve found people talk to me a lot less now.

6 stone down plus a tummy tuck and hardly anyone acknowledges me anymore on the school run