Struggling with jealousy

[Cantbeatasunset]

I am mid forties…with a fairly healthy bmi. 3 years ago I starved myself and worked really really hard to shift 2stone. I’m still not at my goal weight and have probably a stone to go - which I can’t shift.

I work out 4/5 times a week (plus pay for a PT). Hit my daily step count everyday. Watch what I eat
90%of the time (yet will still enjoy a glass of wine on the weekend) and yet still can’t shift it - despite trying for 12months. It’s exhausting, relentless and it’s a battle every day.

So I can’t help feel a little bit hard done by/cheated when I see my friends around me jabbing and dropping weight without much effort! One of my friends won’t even go for a walk as she can’t be bothered!

Dont get me wrong I am so pleased for my friends to have found a solution and I am really happy for them. As I know how unhappy they have been. I always tell them how fab they look and how well they are doing…..

….But inside I am really struggling that because my bmi is not overweight there is nothing to help me. Even though I’m not happy with my size (12), struggle every day with food noise and restrict myself daily.

Am I just being an awful person or are my feelings ok… and can anyone offer advice.

@wrongthinker I think you’re right about acceptance. I could get to say a size 12 but I know I couldn’t maintain it so am aiming for accepting where I am which is actually around 16, focus on strength and nutrition and stuff the scales. I know I still look overweight, and I am, but am healthier and the OP certainly sounds active and fit. Not easy when I could perhaps jab and reduce hunger cues more, and that’s where my jealousy kicks in too, but I can’t afford it so that’s that really, and I spend money on decent food.

Is your goal weight realistic / have you taken medical advice that’s what you should be aiming for.

Mounjaro can leave you feeling drained and other side effects, perhaps that could be why your friend is struggling to exercise.

i'm older and my perspective is this; you need to figure out what you can eat to maintain your weight without exercise.
inevitably at some point you will for logistical reasons or injury not be able to be as active. and without learning now how to eat to maintain your weight you will most likely gain at the first sign of shin splits, fracture, busy month at work or the loss of your pt.

Size 12 is slim but not too slim.
It is a goal size.

Don’t be jealous of people on the injections, they are fantastic for people who need them but if you don’t have to put them in your body then you are lucky.

@QueefQueen80s what you say is absolutely correct and sensible, but it’s sometimes impossible when you’re struggling to feel full on lower calories and the world and his wife seem to be able to give themselves a little magic jab.

Work on intuitive eating and thank your stars you don't have a lifetime of obesity to reckon with.

The grass is always greener on the other side!

True, we feel what we feel!

These injections have killed people in some cases.
They are not without risk.They have brutal side effects.
Also, when all of these people stop using the injections, they will regain all of the weight and then some more.
Far better to address it with lifestyle choices.The way you have.

I used to go to loads of exercise classes and have a PT and it didn’t do much for me. I’d stay the same weight. I then switched to going to the gym and doing weights, and a core class twice a week. I then took up running, and I do 1 long slow run a week and 2 quicker ones. I also started to eat healthier at the same time.

As soon as I started my slow run training (started off 1 hour, built it up to 2.15 hours over 3 months) the weight literally dropped off me. I’ve lost 2 stone and I’m the fittest I’ve ever been.

Lots of people have commented on my weight loss (dropped 2 stone in 5 months) and lots of people have said to me that I must’ve taken WLI. It’s annoying that this is the default setting now if you’ve lost weight, but I’m glad that I don’t have to resort to them. I was overweight because I ate and drank too much. I’m not going to inject myself with chemicals and risk awful side effects to reverse this.

Maybe us fatties can be jealous of your good hormones. It isn't that simple.

It means most people are predisposed to becoming overweight. I believe 2/3s of our population are overweight. I think the situation where people can be a stone or two overweight but need to wait to become a further half a stone overweight before they can use the medication is daft. You have a different opinion and that is of course completely fine. We don't need to agree.