How much cash gift is appropriate for friends’ wedding with children invited?

[Thought23]

Attending a wedding in the summer for friends. We met through our kids. We’re all invited ( 2 adults + 2 kids). Venue is about 2 hours from us. Wedding on a Monday so day off work. We won’t be staying over as hotels were £400+.

How much cash for a wedding gift is the going rate these days? Don’t want to come across cheap!

Just give what you can afford and what you think is appropriate. That could be anything. You know what your relationship with the friend is and what you can afford

Probably £100 for a friend assuming I'm getting a decent meal and glass of fizz out of it.

I'm not a MN millionaire though.

That is entirely irrelevant. Gifts are not meant to be in any way related to what it has cost the host to host you. Otherwise it stops being hosting.

The DC have no income to pay for a present so the gift should be the same regardless of whether they’re going or not. Some of these amounts are madness. My niece got married recently and we gave £100 so I would probably do the same for these friends.

It is cultural. I have been to several Spanish weddings and yes you are absolutely supposed to pay for your ticket/s with a guestimate of the cost per head. They put their bank details on the invitations.

Wow, they actually ticket and expect you to pay for what you eat and drink? That's not exactly hospitable is it?!

@Mymumsthebest , so - if you're Spanish and on a low income, you can't go to family and friends' weddings? I've never heard of that. Seems harsh.

The question was how much is appropriate and what's the going rate.

I don't know for sure what the going rate is but I think for friends £100 is appropriate (and like you I'm in Scotland).

I would be extremely surprised if £300 is considered the minimum in England or in Scotland.

It isn't cultural here, thank goodness.

it is a gift

Gifts are voluntary and it is up to the donor how much they want to spend.

Quite! There's a poster upthread accusing the English of being "tight", well I've been to a lot of English weddings and never once had to pay my costs!

£50 seems fine

What is gift giving like in your circle of friends? For our wedding we received a few cards with £50 in from relatives but aside from that it was just cards or maybe a nice bottle of something. I know if we went to a friend's wedding and put money in a card they'd find it a bit odd as it's not the done thing.

£100

£100 is fine op, the demographic here does not represent real life

Our Irish relatives quoted that sort of figure to us when we attended a wedding in Ireland about 10 years ago. Those same relatives gave us 100 euro between 4 adults when they attended our wedding so I'm assuming it doesn't actually apply if air travel is involved?

Or they're just "tight"?! 😂😂

Completely agree with this.

Useless to ask on here as we’d give £400/500 for 4 people but others might give less, think it entirely depends on your circle and what’s normal. Can you ask any of your friends who’ve already made weddings to see what the norm is?

I don't care what other people would give. I would give what I could afford.

£100.

About £100

My Irish relatives travelled by air to my wedding celebrations - I requested no presents or cash - I really did not want anything from my guests. I still got very generous gifts from the Irish who attended - so who knows.

I would say £50 to £100 depending on how well you know them and how much money you have.

Is it standard to have a free bar in Ireland or are guests expected to both host themselves and give a huge gift?

50-100 for me too based on what you can afford.