What makes a wedding fun or terrible?

[Friedseasalt]

We’ve still got a while until our wedding, but I’ve been thinking about what actually makes weddings fun for guests.

I know some people love them and others find them long or a bit boring, so I’m curious — what are your favourite things about weddings and what do you dislike the most?

Anything that really makes a wedding enjoyable (or the opposite)?

We kept church pics to a minimum and had the bulk of the photos done at the reception venue. Where the canapés could be served and people could get a drink. And sit down. Our canapés were crisps and nuts as fancy ones just end up going round and round. My dad booked singing waiters for dinner entertainment. And I tried to keep the food timings as close to meal times tho my transport was an hour late so that all went to pot. I put out activitie packs on the tables for the little ones. We had table cameras so that kept people busy too and we got some great pics from those cameras. Just a general relaxed vibe. Worst wedding I’d been to where the photos took hours, the canapés started to look unappealing (just fishy ones left) then when we sat down for food it took sooo long to come out. So I’d say try not to keep people hanging around for too long.

Definitely agree with having a quiet side room for use of anyone who needs a breather. My friend had the perfect wedding last year and I really appreciated being able to have a cup of tea (big urn provided) and get away from the music a couple of times. All the older guests were in there too and I enjoyed chatting with friends grandparents and others.
She had a Photo Booth set up thing with silly props which got well used.
Also like the trend of asking all guests to nominate one favourite dance track for the evening bit. You can’t not get up and dance to your tune!

Love a good wedding.

a good wedding to me service good food, nothing too fancy , it has good music , band or dj it doesn’t matter and it’s not too far from home or has plenty rooms to stay in.

i hate pretentious weddings with the magician and the singing waiters with rubbish food and lots of hanging about. I also dislike the sweet carts and crisp walls that people seem to love just now.

Potentially outing but I went to a wedding where the groom had five best men. FIVE. And yes, they all did speeches.

If we hadn't been 200 miles from home I would have left.

Yes to tea and coffee in a quiet space.

Please don't sit me next to a group of people I don't know

Somewhere warm to wait during photos. I live in Scotland, not known for its nice climate.

Oh yes, please please no "strolling magician". I don't know how to politely ask him to go away.

Potentially outing but I went to a wedding where the groom had five best men. FIVE. And yes, they all did speeches.

We may have been at the same wedding 😂 Did the speeches all involve in-jokes and props? We were demented by number 5.

Ceilidhs are always terrible. The two worst weddings I’ve been to had these. Half the guests weren’t interested so had to stand outside while the country dancing went on for hours. So utterly boring.
Weddings with too many children are always awful.
Overly fancy weddings are usually dreadful

The brilliant ones are basic, plenty of good food and plenty of drink and not too long eg. 2/3pm ceremonies so you are eating at 5 and dancing by 7 without hours in between each main event.

Food/drink/somewhere to sit between ceremony in reception.

I often think about the fact in no other circumstance would you invite all your friends to something and then go off for two hours to do a photoshoot with your fella leaving them all twiddling their thumbs but seems to be the norm at weddings. At least make sure they’re fed and watered.

Food. Lots of it. And nice food at that. Always best to be too much than too little.

A good bar.

a brilliant DJ.

A seating plan where friends sit together, I’m here to see you get married not integrate into your wider network.

No organised fun.

The best weddings I have been to are not the ones with the silly magicians etc, or crisp walls 🙄 they’re the simple formula of wedding, food, drinks, disco and more food.

Wow, thank you all 😊I really appreciate everyone sharing their thoughts. My wedding planning notebook is now full of do’s and don’ts, and loads of things I hadn’t even considered while being deep in the chaos of planning. Singing waiters and crisp walls are definitely banned!

Food definitely, and sufficient seating for any evening party. Been to some lovely weddings at beautiful venues, but if I’m not dancing I don’t want to be standing all night. 50 extra evening guests and two small additional sofas in the bar area isn’t sufficient.

DD got married last year, we both agree that good food and as much of a free bar as we could afford were the basics. To accompany that, she spent hours compiling the play list for the evening and even the DJ said it was the best one he’s ever been asked to play and didn’t suggest any changes at all. The dance floor was full all night.

i think you also need to know your audience. some people's friends and family are big party animals, heavy drinkers, disco all night type people and others are the polar opposite so something like a ceilidh might be more suitable. If you've got older guests or even groups of friends / family who haven't seen each other for a long time they might like somewhere quiet to sit away from the dancefloor so they can chat and consider that some older people might prefer a cup of tea on arrival to a glass of fizz! (not stereotyping grannies at all but you get the point!)

Good, music, drink not enough of any of these will make or break

A weekday wedding. You're not going to get the party vibes when everyone has work in the morning and they're already miffed they've had to take at least one day off. (Appreciate many people work weekends and this can't be avoided but there are still likely to be many more that work in the week).

What is a crisp wall and can you get one in your house? Asking for a friend.

I am curious re crisp wall too.

This sounds obvious but make sure there is enough seating.

I have been to several weddings where there weren’t enough places for the guests to sit while they waited for photos to be finished.

One particular location would have been fine if the weather had been good (lots of lovely outdoor seating) but it poured with rain so we were squeezed inside with about 20 seats for 60 guests and no where to put your drink down.

Plenty of food, and not having to wait too long for it! If I'm bringing the kids it really helps to have accommodation on site, as then we can stay until the kids are ready to drop and not have to worry about them falling asleep on the way to the hotel.

One thing I did was put on a bus from the nearest town (Travelodge car park) to and from venue. Our venue had some accommodation but couldn't fit everyone and I didn't want people to worry about driving. I'd say 90% of guests not staying at the venue used it and said it was super fun meeting everyone before the ceremony and then they had a party on the way back.

I hate being sat with people I don’t know. Even good friends of mine have done this. Rather than sit our largish friendship group across 2 or 3 tables we were all split up and so I had to spend hours with people I don’t know and probably won’t meet again. That is not fun that is work.

It was a board that had loads of packets of crisps attached to it! Great in concept, wouldn’t mind one at home, but didn’t make up for the shite atmosphere and boring band that was on!

I’ll join in the chorus saying 1. Plenty of food and drink and 2. Zero hanging about.

The best wedding food I ever had was an Iranian-Serbian wedding. The food simply started in a flood, NEVER STOPPED COMING and it was all delicious. Compare and contrast with small slice of chicken and dollop of apple pie elsewhere.

We’re doing ceremony at the local church and a party at home 5 mins walk away. I’m still managing to spend a vast amount of money but at least we get to pick exactly what happens. Pretty much all the venues you book as a package will have very limited choices. Decide what’s really important and work back towards the venue decision from there, rather than starting with how beautiful the venue is.

The best I ever went to was Jewish. Canapés the instant you stepped through the door then endless food interspersed with dancing, singing, toasting and so on.

1. enough food and drink
2. not enough food and drink