What makes a wedding fun or terrible?

[Friedseasalt]

We’ve still got a while until our wedding, but I’ve been thinking about what actually makes weddings fun for guests.

I know some people love them and others find them long or a bit boring, so I’m curious — what are your favourite things about weddings and what do you dislike the most?

Anything that really makes a wedding enjoyable (or the opposite)?

Depends on your budget but we had free ice cream for everyone from an ice cream van, and hired giant garden games for them to play. And a bouncy castle. This was mainly to keep people occupied during the boring photo bits.

We also kept it tight time-wise, starting mid-afternoon to give people chance to get there without having to leave at dawn or stay over the night before.
We also had the ceremony and reception in the same place, which made it easier for people. They could also stay the night in that same place.

Obviously if you want a church wedding then that last bit isn't necessarily feasible!

We also tried to make the whole day interactive for grown ups and kids. The order of service had fun activities for the kids in it like a wedding themed word search and colouring in bits. And we did a treasure hunt round the venue for them (the treasure was sugared almonds that were also favours on the tables). The grown ups had speech-bingo cards where they could cross off clichéd words and phrases to win a prize.

Bloody loved my wedding. Shame I was in a big old dress, had to talk to everyone and then put out, rather than get wasted with a small group of friends. Ha!

Basically agree with everyone else, I love a wedding and have been to many awesome ones. But you need to feed and water ( or give them access to a bar) your guests appropriately. Most travel a fair distance and now earlier weddings are popular many guest will not have eaten at all prior to the event. Don’t leave them starving whilst photos run for 2 h. If it is canapes served make sure the servers get round everyone, ie those nearest the exit from the kitchen don’t guzzle them all. And yes yes to a pp, it’s not team building, for the love of god do not sit me with a load of randomers who I will never meet again. It is so fucking uncomfortable, no one ( no one) likes it, sit me with my mates and we will all have a great time.

Too much booze with zero food makes them aggro or tiring, or just plain dull. Make sure there’s a constant supply of food

The best weddings are the ones where everything is on one site, so ceremony, reception and accommodation. I hate having to drive around between different venues and if people want to have a drink it’s so much better to be at the hotel already.

As a coeliac proper gluten free food and not just given the least thought out food while others lap it up. Other than that it's all about the company for me and if l have a good catch up and a few fun chats and see a happy bride and groom l'm happy.
Also love the speeches if they are personal and don't drag on.

Children, good food and being able to stay over.

Oh, and also lots of nibbles during the photos bit, food late on as well (we had a giant hot pot thing late on which was both cheap and filling for everyone, not just the evening guests).

And most of all, I think, no Bridezilla behaviour, nobody acting like a dick in any way, and just take it easy. We had a table plan but I didn't give a shit if people ignored it so long as nobody else did. Bring your kids by all means if they're invited. People had given up their entire weekends and spent an arm and a leg on petrol and maybe a hotel room and maybe a present. I bloody loved them for it and made it known throughout!

Food food food.

the worst wedding I ever went to the ceremony was at 2pm and the food did not happen until 10pm. We were eating our own arms by that point.

Plenty of good food and drink. Being hungry and thirsty is miserable. Speeches after meal, not before. No big gaps eg for photos. At my cousins wedding there was a huge gap while a live band got set up. Like absolutely ages, no background music or anything. Everyone was just sat around bored. Then another break later on when they took it all down and the dj got set up. It was rubbish and killed the atmosphere. No massive drive between church and venue. Went to a wedding once with ceremony at midday, then an hours drive from church to venue. Some people got lost and again, it killed all the excitement. I think you need to keep things moving along in a bit of a timely fashion. Not rushed, but just not tons of waiting around.

Strong agree. If you want your wedding to be all about you, have just the two of you there. If you're inviting guests, be considerate of them. I'm not a fan of weddings in any case, but the very worst are where the B&G expect to be admired and applauded while their guests starve/freeze/die of boredom.

Having it in a place easily accessible by taxi/public transport with lots of options for staying very nearby. Having it start late afternoon so the day isn’t too long. Not having ear splitting music from a band or disco. People should be able to talk to each other.

Make sure they are not exposed to the elements, comfortable, well fed and watered, transport to and from is not a nightmare and there’s a banging soundtrack. Congratulations on your wedding 🍾

Also, sit your guests with friends/family they like and get on with. None of this mixing up. Hate having to make small talk with people I don’t know. And if a friend/relative has a long-term partner invite them. Even if you don’t know them especially well (we hadn’t even met one or two of ours). Hate all the ‘it’s our day’ selfishness. Just invite partners then everyone will have a nice time.

If the venue is miles from anywhere with no accommodation nearby it instantly puts me off. We either have to fork out a fortune in taxis or one of us has to drive, which is no fun at all.

And unless you’re the kind of person who can easily mingle with strangers and make friends easily, it is awful being seated with strangers or people you barely know.

Best wedding I ever went to was SIL’s. Only about 20 guests - just close family & friends. Sat around one big table in a private dining room at a local gastro-pub, everyone could choose off the menu instead of a set meal, the wine flowed, we played games between courses and didn’t have far to stagger home.

Yes!

Not a tiring all-day affair with loads of standing about.

When it comes to weddings, a sprint is better than a marathon tbh.

The shorter the better tbh (yeah, older person here and veteran of many weddings)
Feed me nice food, don’t make me play games or participate in anything that looks like an icebreaker - I didn’t come to make new friends, I came here to celebrate your day and to catch up with old friends. Have a band not a DJ. Don’t stretch everything out to fit 8 or more hours.
Probably an unpopular vow I know.

We planned our wedding primarily with the guests in mind. The location was halfway between families with rooms on site, easily accessible off main routes, with other options nearby. Ceremony and reception in the same place. Canapes during photos, quick speeches and a free bar until the allocated money ran out. I hope they enjoyed it! My original option was City Hall New York but I couldn't do it to my widowed dad.

I’ve been to 3 terrible, terrible weddings, and each one had the same problem - guests were made to stand around all day with no food or drinks. One of them was in a beautiful hotel that clearly cost a bomb to hire, but they had put all their budget into the venue and had nothing to spend on food and drink, meaning guests were queuing at the chip shop opposite, and having to spend £18 on a gin and tonic at the hotel bar - makes me cringe when I think of it. They finally laid out a buffet in the evening which went so quickly the bride didn’t get time to get some food and was starving.

The best hosts are the ones that ensure the guests are looked after IMO - drinks, nibbles and a decent meal - doesn’t have to be fancy, but does have to be substantial and enough to keep guests going throughout the day.

No gaps where guests are just left on their own while the bridal part fanny around elsewhere.
Plenty of food, right through the event.
Good selection of non alcoholic drinks.
Being warm ie not an open sided marquee when it’s blowing a gale and freezing.
Best wedding we went to was a barn dance.

Really like it when they don’t start early!! I get fed up if it’s a full day affair. The best weddings start at 3pm. Everyone’s had a chance to have a proper lunch before coming (rather than the 1pm weddings! When you’ve skipped lunch getting there & have to wait till 5 to eat).

I love it when there’s some live music. A band & singer. Gets people dancing.

Love it when there are some kids there running around enjoying the day, making it more casual somehow. People are more relaxed & will dance.

Always enjoy a big delicious wedding cake. I know not everyone does one these days. But a big slice of cake is just what I fancy. Extra points if it’s a choice of 3 flavours.

A great wedding is one where the guests experience is front and centre. So good food, not a lot of hanging around, being greeted and made to feel welcome by the hosts.

Also not a lot of expensive pre-wedding activities. Happy to go to a local hen night out but that's it

Food at appropriate intervals which is actually tasty and timely once produced in bulk (had too much tepid, dried up chicken) and keep speeches to brief, those in jokes are not funny to 80% of the guests. Good entertainment helps, a band ideally, and playing a good mix for the different ages. If photos are going to take ages, lay on drinks and nibbles

The worst ones have had karaoke...and nowhere to sit out of earshot.
There's 3 types of karaoke people.
Those who can sing.
Those can't (but think they can).
Those who would rather pluck out their eyelashes with a rusty spoon. (My people !)

Plenty of snacks - crisps/ breadsticks/ popcorn
minimum photo gap.
Bar near the “action “ not in another part of the venue- this will break up your wedding party.
If you can afford it- a good wedding host/ singer/MC is money well spent. A bad one on the other hand will make your day memorable for a whole host of other reasons 😂
Anywhere with a designated outdoor smoking/vaping hut is also a hard no from me - especially if it’s heated and has seating.