What makes a good wedding

[supertayto66]

Thinking back to weddings you have been a guest at.... If you considered it a great wedding, what made it so great? The food, the music, something special that was arranged by the couple?

Good food. No waiting round for hours while the couple have photos taken. No "favours" which usually get chucked. No long or multiple speeches.
The best weddings I've been to had a ceremony at midday, then a sit down meal.
Wave the B&G off on honeymoon at about 5pm, then off home, or out with a group somewhere else.
Not a tiresome marathon. No "evening do".

Music is huge. I've been to weddings with bands and they were SO boring. Only a small percentage of the wedding enjoyed the music and the rest just sat around. I prefer a DJ that can work with the crowd. Free alcohol also generally makes people have more fun, unless you have guests that are inclined to veer into unpleasantly drunk territory.

I prefer it when the ceremony doesn't go on and on and bore the life out of people, my BILs church service lasted two hours.

Another 1- a toilet with lighting to get to it!

Went to a barn wedding, venue decked out and stunning, BUT, the only toilet was a port-a-loo in the field, so you had to walk through mud and grass to get to it. No light en-route and none inside! Absolutely grim for all. I have no idea what the bride did?

Best one I have been to had lots of parking at reception, transport for guests to/from service, lots of drinks and canapes whilst photos were done with guest groups being called over for photos, icebreakers on tables to encourage guests to chat to people they didn't know (sounds hideous but wasn't), evening food and dancing and a photo booth to give the non dancers something to laugh at with a bonus of photos sent out afterwards and souvenirs for B&G.

I went to a wedding at a Botanical Garden, the ceremony was in a glass house, as was the buffet. However, there was no toilet! We had to walk about 20 minutes to a Starbucks on the main road, until they stopped us. None of us stayed long.
Think about the guests, not just the pictures.

invite does not ask for money!
Venue within 3 miles of my home
Starts at 3…food at 4…free bar 5-8…home before dark!

And I hate the ones with a free unlimited bar. At least use a ticketing system so no one gets trollied and aggy

Don't hold the wedding or reception in the middle of bloody nowhere unless you provide transport to and from. Don't leave your guests too long without food and drink. Serve food at a sensible time. Ideally have a free bar or at least some free wine. Don't have a ridiculously long photo session. Don't spend a fortune on flowers or favours. I think people prefer more informal weddings generally. They want to have fun and celebrate not stand around in the cold gagging for food and drink or spend a fortune on taxis.

Start at 12, done by 6, so you don't have to fork out £££ on accommodation.
Decent food.
Free bar but sensible guests who don't get drunk.

A couple who are genuinely affectionate and glad to be sharing their day with friends and family.

This ^

Enough food, served at a reasonable time.
Not too much waiting around.
Definitely not the B&G disappearing with the photographer for an hour, so not only are guests waiting around, but guests end up without any photos of the couple on the day.
Not too early in the day - so everyone has had chance to have their lunch and to be able to travel to the venue on the morning of the wedding (if not local)
Not being forced to pay extortionate prices to attend - by the occasion being held somewhere remote with no choice of accommodation (or even taxis)
The bar prices to be reasonable / comparable to normal pub prices (see last point about trapping guests into spending ridiculous amounts).

Then, going from threads I've seen (as never known anyone in real life who would do this)

• not dictating what colour clothes people should wear
• not having fancy dress (as in costumes, rather than clothes that are fancy)

Yes, that would be the perfect timing.

Remember when marrying couples were actually eager to set off alone instead of stretching the day out interminably?!

Happy people who all want to be there.

Indeed! Also, I used to love seeing off the B&G, remember when we used to write "Just Married" on the car and tied tin cans to it!

1. Have the wedding local. The best one I went to was for a friend. I can see the church from my house and the reception venue was just around the corner in the next street.
2. No karaoke. You always get some twat who thinks that they are Celine Dion and hogs the microphone despite having a voice that would make you wish you were deaf.
3. Not leaving your guests while you go off to the local beauty spot (around here it tends to be Clifton Suspension Bridge) for photos.
4. Not having a photographer who ends up monopolising the event.

My favourites have had lovely grounds with garden games (this breaks the ice and gets you chatting with people you don’t know / passes the time), food trucks / buffet food (rather than a long, sit down meal), not too much hanging around, a fun disco (light sticks in the dark worked well).

Put people on tables with people they know! Don't try to be clever and spread people around based on what some book or website says is the best way to make a good party.

In theory people love to mix and are desperate to make new connections and leap into conversation with strangers, but in reality weddings are often the only times people get to see extended family or friends who have moved away,, and 90% of people want to spend time with them.

As in all wedding related considerations, you should always keep in mind that most of your guests are spending considerable time, effort and money to attend something that's far more important to you than to most of them, and you should prioritise their comfort rather than trying to get a warm glow of satisfaction from forcing friendships out of people whose only connection is that they know you.

Why do you need games to "pass the time"?
It's a wedding, you should be sitting down to a meal after the ceremony, I don't understand the need, really.

Plenty of food at regular intervals.

All of this ⬆️

Best wedding was a very informal do at a local steading. Ceremony outside (weather was fab, luckily), no formal photos, loads of space for all the kids to run around outside with lots of outdoor games, an Indian buffet and champagne indoors with minimal speech’s, tables where everyone knew each other, and a local band for some dancing.

"Should"? There's no should, every wedding is different.

Enough food (inc for your guests with dietary requirements, I've gone very hungry when the canapes were supposed to keep you going for a few hours and I got one that was suitable, and nothing in the evening)
Enough drink (free bar not necessary, but access to buy a range inc non alcoholic. Having to pay through the nose for orange juice I didn't even want was particularly irking, but not as much as only getting tap water during meals as there was only wine)
Enough seats in the right places. I have had to carry a chair around for the elderly as there was nowhere to sit while waiting around, or that the ideal spot for photos was too much of a walk for them from where there was seating. Or you are stuck mingling in a canape reception with nowhere to sit for hours which is just a pain.

Ok. I'll rephrase it. Why do you need games to "pass the time" at a wedding?
Perhaps hosting the guests would be preferable, but that's only in my humble opinion.

Food at normal mealtimes

Normal bar prices

People talking to each other - quiet areas, enough chairs

Danceable music (even if it’s a bit naff)

Bride and groom mingling and making sure their guests are having a good time

Separate room from music/disco so older epeolple can hear each other and talk!