What makes a good wedding

[supertayto66]

Thinking back to weddings you have been a guest at.... If you considered it a great wedding, what made it so great? The food, the music, something special that was arranged by the couple?

This. Everything over by 6pm; those who want to party can go off and do so.

Also no speeches, just a single toast to the marrying couple.

Genuine and moving marriage ceremony.

Great food, free bar, live entertainment.

Country manor, port/cigars/champagne after the ceremony. A choice of food, pianist during dinner. Lots of sofas and armchairs in the evening. It was a very costly wedding though.

A recent one, two of the bridesmaids who'd known the bride since they were toddlers gave a very funny speech along with the best man's.

Many years ago, being single and being seated at the same table as all the single men. That was very good fun.

Another recent one, the bride and groom made everyone stay seated, put their glass down whilst the B and G toasted and thanked their guests for coming and being supportive in life. That was actually very touching.

Finally, Indian banquet as the evening meal

Dance floor seperate to dining space.
No need for people to move. People can circulate and chat.

No long gaps between things, so not starting too early, and then having ages milling around while the couple is having pictures done, and then having cocktails/canapés.

Guests are just that, guests. So consider their comfort, rather than focusing entirely on what's happening with the bride and groom.

Now I think of it, there was no receiving line nor table greetings at a recent wedding I went to, it was a beautiful wedding and the couple kept the numbers small so they could splash out on food/drink/venue/dream dress/booze. There was not a single guest there that both the bride and groom both didn't know well, so no need for formal greetings, just relaxed mingling.

At another wedding the couple did go around each table in the evening but they must have had 250 guests (Asian wedding).

Lots of food. My nephew's wedding had a big sit down lunch, then while we waited outside in the glorious gardens for the room to be made up for the evening do there was more food as a buffet, then even more food in the evening. It was great!

Oh, and plenty of interesting non-alcoholic drinks available, particularly if it's one of those weddings with a bottle of red wine and a bottle of white wine on each table. PLEASE give us something other than sparkling water or orange juice!

No destination wedding unless one of you is from that country.

we don’t want to take our annual leave and fly to Thailand to see you get married.

Remember that it's a party and you are the hosts.

Provide plenty of food, drink and entertainment for your guests. Have a quieter area for people to sit and chat.

Don't make guests go to a lot of expense, eg expensive hotel rooms, ridiculous hen weekends.

Nobody cares about table gifts, bows on chairs etc etc. All they want is a nice time and to see the two of you married.

The best wedding reception I've ever been to was in a country pub, choice of 3 meals, free wine on the table. No waiting around in the cold while the photos were taken.

In all honesty my favourite ones have been ones where it's the ceremony at about 12 then FOOD that arrives quickly. Then a bit of milling around and cake then that's it. Don't make a marathon out of it for your guests.

Totally agree, the later they start the better, the day is too long and a good few hours are just spent hanging around while the bride and groom go off to take photos. ( this is the worst part)
A good band is essential in the evening to get the atmosphere going and decent warm food is also necessary, venue also needs to be warm

Things like spending loads on flowers and table arrangements make no difference

Later in the day, sitting with friends, not ages spent waiting around, nice places to sit and chat, free bar!

Good food and enough!
Wine/beer/soft drinks included
Venue and accommodation together, if accommodation is reasonably priced

I hate:
-Canape wedding with no other food and not enough for an entire night. This wedding also didn't have enough seating for all guests. A few tables, a few beanbags, a few stools, but not enough for all in what was touted to be a 'trendy' venue!
-Being invited to a wedding, then sent the price list for the pizza van that would pull up. Fine, but they also didn't say anything about NO gift in lieu of having to buy our own meal!
-Buffet where there is a long queue of people standing and waiting. Often only 2 staff serving, if at all, no one co-ordinating the queue so people enter from both sides
-Fights
-Drunk best man speeches including lewd details about the grooms wayward youth. 1 wedding, the best man asked the women in the room with a house key to the grooms house to return it, and multiple women walked to the front dropping their key back! BM thought it was hilarious but it was just so cringy!

I agree with no recieving line, but the couple should to go around each table for a quick chat - I was at a cousins wedding where the couple just hung out with close friends, family felt very unwelcome.

i would expect wine on eactable , free bar is great but not expected at all. Lots of food - buffet is fine as long as it's generous.

Best I was at was in a marquee in a friends parents garden, which was a 10 minute walk from the church, and a disco afterwards. It wasn't a huge posh garden, there was a choice of downstairs loo or a couple of fancy portable toilets (they exist!), but informal and fun.

We went to a wedding in November - it was very good.

What I liked -

The wedding and reception were in the same place, so no schlepping between.

There was extremely gorgeous lodge accommodation onsite available for guests to book (with discounted rates).

The service was short and secular.

No receiving line (tbh, I haven’t seen one of these in years)

While the photographs were going on, the guests were directed to a lovely area (with the ubiquitous string quartet) and plied with loads of champagne, cocktails and beer with an endless stream of waiters with hot canapés.

The meal itself was extremely good and the service excellent. They had enough servers that everyone on each table got each course at exactly the same time. More than enough wine and it was good quality.

There was really good evening food. I didn’t eat any, but everyone else was enjoying hot ‘gastro pub’ type food.

Free bar in evening (I think this should be a given)

QR code for guests to upload photos.

NO dress code or ridiculous diktats about what colours were permitted.

Not so good -

Speeches - always a boring bit imo, and these went on and on. The groomsmen might find the drunken antics stories hilarious (with props!) but nobody else does.

The evening music. No floor fillers at all and we didn’t dance as a result. It’s so important to have great music that gets people up. It was sad to see so few on the dance floor.

The cake and huge display of sweet things was such a waste. Nobody went near it.

Photo booth - yawn.

Good entertainment
Good food
A couple who actually look happy (been to plenty where the bride was a stressed out misery guts all day)
Venue with accommodation on site
No long gaps where you're waiting around starving
No long speeches
A good DJ who knows how to keep the dancefloor full

Not being cold. Not having to wait for hours while photos are taken. Whenever I think of weddings I think of standing around in the cold while the couple have their photos done or being kept waiting for hours in a draughty bar with the doors open.
I have to admit we were guilty of this too but I didn’t know any better being young and foolish at the time.

I think with the cost of beer and wine these days that would end up being extortionate, also I remember being at a wedding with a free bar years ago and the amount of half / quarter / hardly touched drinks around at the end was ridiculous, if people had forgotten where they had left their drink after a dance they would just order a new one as it was free

I think it’s a common theme in the responses that the waiting around between the ceremony and the evening meal is the worst part, so boring but it happens at most weddings

The best wedding we went to was small and everything was provided for guests: transport, plentiful food and accommodation. We had to pay for evening drinks but that was it. It was brilliant and fondly remembered. We were treated like proper guests not renta-crowd.

Free bar
minimal speeches
photographs taken quickly
no hanging about between ceremony and food and drink
whole event in one place no travelling
cheap accommodation available
space to get away from loud music
nice food is nice, but if everything above is ok then can accept cheap buffet

The best wedding I've been to was one where the bride and groom were just very calm, laid back people. No bridezilla demands and when things went wrong they just rolled with it. Because of that other guests were at ease, took uncomfortable hats and shoes off early in the day and just relaxed, had a laugh and enjoyed the day.

They also had a "no cash" casino in that awkward bit between the sit down meal and the evening do, which I thought was a great idea.

Apart from that, warm comfortable venue (no thanks to that Marquee in February!)
Plenty of food and drink and limit the dull bits like photos and speeches so people aren't waiting around for hours with nothing to do.

Three things for me; free bar (I don't want my guests to have to pay anything on the day), good food and live band. I think the live band gives a great atmosphere and gets people on the dancefloor.

Our DDS 2nd wedding.
Married at Noon in the registry office.
Only people invited to that were immediate family. 16 plus bride and groom.
Lots of photos were taken by DDS best friend. (Amateur photographer)
Meal at 1.30pm.
All other guests were invited to the local social club for 5.30pm.
Free bar, cameras on the table, disco started straight away, BBQ until 7.30,
snacks on the table. At 10pm pizzas were available.
Side room for people who didn't like the noise.

My main thing is plentiful, good food. Not stingey on the alcohol.

Agree that too long getting hosed waiting for photos to be done CAN ruin it but I try and keep a lid on the drinking until the meal.

It's nice if it's in a location where people can get drunk and get to a convenient hotel room or home, so not in the middle of nowhere, and logistics considered from church to hotel.

Happy for it to start after 1, 2 better, 12 is early and a nightmare to manage food.

Good DJ at the disco. Cheesy all ages music.

I like the speeches! It's my after dinner entertainment. Not too long obviously.

Decent late night food a good idea, soak up the alcohol.

Been to some great weddings and dress, flowers, favours, cake, decor all unimportant BUT I have enjoyed thoughtful touches and I like the sugared almonds, whiskey miniatures, cupcakes, sweet trolley, scratch cards my friends at various weddings laid on.

One friend did full size honey with the couples names on and some kind of artisan gin with their names on. That was a nice touch to have a big gift area with lots for everyone.

I've enjoyed elaborate floral displays and giant "LOVE" letters and fairy lights. I loved the marquee in a friends parent's field with wonderful catered food and a ceildh? Irish band. Its nice when weddings are a bit individual and the couple have tried hard.