No free bar

[DollyLlama]

I’m planning my wedding reception for June and have found a lovely venue in a football ground. Really nice, plenty of room and it’s 1 month after the wedding as were eloping to Gretna Green.

Here lies the problem. They won’t let us provide any alcohol for the tables and I’m really reluctant to have a free bar (or put money behind it) because we’re trying to keep costs really low (plus I work for their drinks supplier so I know their eye watering mark up on the drinks).

Would it be frowned upon to have a pay bar? I’ve only ever been to one wedding that had a free bar and people just went mad getting drink after drink and barely finishing it before they got the next and we just can’t afford that.

I’ll add wine to the tokens (I don’t know why I didn’t suggest that I’m a red wine drinker) and get some prosecco out on the tables I think.

I’ve gone from long term relationship to planning a wedding quickly in 3 months and I’ve got so much on my mind i just needed some input!

Only ever been to one wedding with a free bar; would never expect it. Maybe a prosecco/fresh orange on arrival would be nice or as others suggeted vouchers.

I disagree with those who suggest a bar has to be free. Most weddings we have been to have had wine with the meal and fizz for toasts provided then a pay bar.
The ones that have had a free bar have had a lot of waste as people put glasses down while mingling then lose track of them and get another

I always think with weddings that you should do whatever works for you. The people who care about you won't bother what the drinks arrangements are, they will just enjoy being there

I would never expect a free bar all night at a wedding. I have only ever been to one that did and it was a fairly lavish one!
I would say and arrival drink and a glass of wine on the table is more than enough.

@outymcoutface it's nothing to do with not being able to host or bad form, it's about the blatant fraud that goes on (as well as the up pricing to a lesser degree)!

Are you sure they just don’t want you bringing wine from home for the tables? Surely the best approach is for you to buy a couple of bottles of (house) wine per table from the bar and ask for wine glasses to be laid out? Saves you faffing with vouchers.

I was going to say the same as Bovney
The tokens seem a bit of a faff.
That said, I have been to dozens and dozens and dozens of weddings over several decades, and I have never been at a wedding with a free bar. There's no expectations at all.

It's nice to get at least one free drink. Makes you feel welcomed as a guest rather than as if you've just turned up at a bar where a lot of other people you know happen to be. And everyone likes a freebie so you'll put them in a good mood straight away.

Most weddings have a pay bar. You’re spending enough as it is.

For a wedding reception only, a couple of free drinks from the host from the bar (not everyone drinks wine and processco is 🤮), a good buffet and a bit of wedding cake is all you need (and a venue where the bar isnt shockingly expensive)

I sometimes think I move in complete different circles to some people on here (which of course, I probably do, but...) I have never been to a wedding with a free bar. I’ve normally been given a couple of glasses of wine and a fizz for the toasts, but as I don’t like wine, I end up buying my own anyway. We would always take cash as we would expect to pay for our own drinks. I have no problem providing a few drinks for my friends when they come here for an evening, but there’s no way we could have afforded a piss up for all our guests when we got married, some of them can drink gallons!

I had a free bar. It was a nightmare as everyone got hammered.

I went to a wedding with a pay bar that only took cash, miles away from a cash point, we had to club together to buy drinks.

With warning it's fine.

At mine we are having jugs of Pimms, jugs of real lemonade and jugs of Mead. No fizz, it’s awful stuff. No wine on tables, it’d all go to waste. Guests can buy what they actually want from the bar. If I’m going to be judged for that then they don’t belong at my wedding.

We had wine and fizz on the table during the meal and then a paid bar. I have only ever been to one wedding in my life with a free bar (DH very rich cousin) and I've been to loads spread across the whole of the Uk and Ireland

I wouldn’t send out the vouchers with the invitations - they’ll get lost. It’d be easier (on the guests) to work out some way to give them the tokens on arrival.

We’re putting $2000 behind the bar for our venue and advising on the invitations that it’s a cash bar. That way it’ll be a nice surprise when people find out that we’re buying some drinks. It worked out cheaper to do this than have the drinks package and we had to choose one or the other. I’d rather provide more food than free drinks which is why we’re taking the cheaper option.

We didn't have a free bar and no one seemed to mind in fact I have never been to wedding where there was a free bar it's not something any of us could afford to do. We've always had a good time at the weddings we've been too and never minded paying for drinks as it's what (in our circle) we expect to do. I'm sure people won't mind as they will want to celebrate with you

I've never been to a wedding with a free bar. We had two glasses of fizz per person while the photos were being done, half a bottle of wine per person on table with dinner and another glass of fizz for the toasts. We also made sure a family member collared the evening guests as they arrived and bought them their first drink on our tab. Ended up only being a few hundred pounds.

I'd look for another venue that allows table wine.

(You're the customer after all)

Free bar to me means you get wine, toast served to you at the table/put on table then you pay for extra not you have pay for anything you drink. What drinks will venue put on table included in price (water, juice?), will they let you provide wine if you pay corkage. Seems very restrictive but suppose they can call the tune and they want every penny they can get.

I’ve been to a TON of weddings and never once has there been a free bar!

I've only been to one wedding with a completely free bar and after seeing the states some people got into I wouldn't recommend it. People who otherwise wouldn't really took the piss. I wouldn't be at all offended if drinks were not included. At my wedding we are providing a toast drink and one glass of wine with the meal. I think a voucher for 1 drink is a good idea.

I’m on my 30s and have never been to a wedding with a free bar. There’s usually been wine on the table but no free bar.

I would pay for the wine for the tables and have a pay bar.

You’ve phrased your OP to suggest you can’t have wine in the tables but it seems its actually that the venue won’t allow you to bring your own in - which isn’t unreasonable. I know their mark-up will be annoying but that’s weddings.

The voucher idea is really naff.

We had our wedding on a budget and couldn't afford to supply a free bar at all. We had prosecco or orange juice as welcome drinks and fizz for toasting. We had quite a lot of children at our wedding too and i find that they drink soooo much and cost a bomb so i had an agreement woth the bar that i paid for the cost of several bottles of squash and they kept jugs (and water) topped up all day/night on a table so parents had the choice of paying for their children's drinks or getting them for free. Many of the parents thanked us for that as kids drinks can be extortionate especially if there's several to buy for.