Is my fiance selfish to spend £600 on a stag do

[DH14]

Is it just me or am I right to complain that my fiancé is spending £600 on a stag do snowboarding abroad in Tignes with his mates when we are trying like mad to save for the wedding. We haven't had a decent holiday in 3 years. His best man is arranging it and my fiancé isn't too keen on snowboarding either. My fiancé has told his best man we are trying to save for a wedding it he's still going ahead and organising it even though my fiancé has told him we are struggling.

Your fiance needs to put his foot down. Sounds to me like the best man is arranging a holiday that he wants to go on , not a stag do for your fiance.
You and your fiance need to tell the best man in no uncertain terms that this is stag do is not what you want.
Not much of a best man is he if he does not listen. I would be concerned about his behaviour /speech on the wedding day if he is so thoughtless

Yep, what Sarikiz said. It sounds as though best man wants a snowboarding holiday and thinks this is a good excuse.
Any reasonable friend should understand that a budget needs to apply - your fiancé needs to tell the BM exactly what the budget limit is.
(Plus before he sets it, think about what he's going to spend on top of the basic cost of the trip. Does the £600 above include lift passes, equipment hire, food, booze, winter sports insurance - or just the flights and accommodation??).

He needs to give a budget and say he won't go above.

He needs to say. If the groom thinks it's too much, imagine how resentful the others will be. Why do best men and bridesmaids go so overboard? It's like the suggestion of a nice dinner and a few drinks is a blow to their personal honour!

You fiancé needs to speak up, say what sort of stag do he'd like and what his budget is.

Hi girls, I totally agree with what everyone is saying especially about the best man who is totally taking over and using this as an excuse for something he wants to do. Price includes flights, accommodation and lift passes but transfers and food and drink still need to be paid for. He will also need a snow suit etc

The flipping stag do is costing more than my engagement ring too! I am try to save money on everything for the wedding in every way. We probably won't be able to afford a honeymoon either. We haven't been on a decent holiday for 3 years this is why I am so cross

Your fiance sounds like he is being steamrollered by bestman.

Does he want a wedding and a wife or a bestman? He needs to decide. Bestman can be replaced.

My fiancé has already told the best man we are trying to save for the wedding. He offered to pay for him in the beginning but all that seems to have gone quiet and my fiancés pride won't let the best man pay either

Your fiancé can say no. He doesn't have to go because his friend is arranging it. He just needs to be clear that he won't go. And, yes, it would be selfish if you don't have the money.

My fiancé asked one of his other friends to be best man but his other friend (the one who is organising the stag do) decided they were going to do it together and he has totally taken over.

I have absolutely no idea why my fiancé won't tell him

Tell him he needs to put his foot down HARD. This guy is taking the piss.

I know we have numerous arguments over it. The other frustrating thing is that I have said on a few occasions in the past about both me and home going on a snowboarding holiday and he just said no, he doesn't want to because he doesn't like snowboarding. Why tell me that but he won't tell his mate

Him not home

There is no way he should have a trip abroad when it would mean you couldn't afford a honeymoon. This best man is getting out of control and your fiance needs to tell him. If he can't do it himself, get the guy to call round so you can tell them together.

Sounds like the best man is doing what he wants to do and not what your OH wants

I totally agree with you and for some reason he gets embarrassed when he has to his friend he doesn't want to do something. Everything his friend has ever done is always totally over the top. It's ok for them, they have a lot more money than we do.

I would seriously consider whether you want to marry someone who won't stand up for himself or you as a couple. As you said, he has no problem saying no to you so why not to his friend. He needs to show where his priorities lie otherwise he's not exactly showing himself to be great husband material.

You fiancé clearly has reservations, I would suggest that his best man is being a bit of a dick. Just tell him not to go if he doesn't really want to. It seems like his best man is using him quite frankly.

We have just had another huge argument over it. He said if he says anything the best man will pay for him and that's embarrassing

I have absolutely no idea how to speak to him about it because when I do he just gets really stressed out.

If he isn't keen on snowboarding he is probably inexperienced so it would not be a great idea to partake in a risky sport before a wedding, you know, broken bones etc.