The imaginatively-named Wedding Quiche

[TobyLerone]

Come one, come all.

Getting married? Come and tell us about it so you don't have to go on the scary Bridezilla forums.

Wedding-whore? Come and relive the best day of your life.

Wedding-voyeur? Bugger off, you freak! Get your fix here.

[AKissIsNotAContract]

The baby will be 7 months. We are having a child free wedding but making an exception for her children and my nephews. It's actually my future SIL who seems to be a reluctant BM. I only asked her to be nice, she was really keen at first then she got engaged and I think she's lost interest. It's a bit awkward now because I don't want her to feel like she can't say no but don't want to exclude her either.

[RedGreenRouge]

AKiss, we're in London but will hopefully be married in Scotland. We're looking at Glasgow primarily at the moment. We want a blessing in a church later as we're religious so had hoped for somewhere near to a liberal enough church. We were very tempted by certain places in Brighton and certain place in Wales but we weren't sure if a fully "gay" wedding would be fair on our families (who are very supportive but some a tad unsure and uncomfortable at times).

[AKissIsNotAContract]

I live near Brighton and my sister had her civil partnership in Horsham. I'm not sure what you mean by a fully 'gay' wedding really!

[roughtyping]

Red, at the Rennie Mackintosh church on Maryhill Road in Glasgow you can have a humanist ceremony. It's beautiful :)

[roughtyping]

If you need any help with Glasgow venues etc I'm happy to help btw

[roughtyping]

mackintosh church

[RedGreenRouge]

Thanks rough!We're looking for something quite small at the moment for the blessing but that might change if my dad's family decide to come so I'll keep that in my wedding folder.

[RedGreenRouge]

By gay wedding I meant somewhere in which we would be conspicuously having a civil partnership. For example, the place in Wales seems to cater exclusively for civil partnerships. It was beautiful but might make the Catholic members of my family uncomfortable, sadly.

[AKissIsNotAContract]

Perhaps we are spoilt being near Brighton. Every venue we looked at did both civil partnerships and civil marriages.

[TobyLerone]

Morning, chatty wedding ladies!

I'm getting married in January. We only got engaged in August, so we haven't had long to plan, really. The other night, though, we were saying we wish it was sooner because pretty much everything is done and we're just twiddling our thumbs now.

[Thistledew]

Hello All

DP and I got engaged in May and we are getting married in April next year. We have the venue booked (not easy to do in London in under a year unless you pay ££££ as everything seems to get booked up years in advance.

We made and sent out the first tranche of invitations to family and long-term friends, and replies are just starting to come back. We are planning to send out another tranche in the new year to colleague friends, once we have settled on what our budget can be.

We have booked the Registrar and given notice of intention.

I am having my dress made, and going for a first fitting today. DP has his suit on order.

We have booked a venue at which we will have both the civil ceremony and meal/evening entertainment. It is less than 10 mins down the road from us! We are having quite a lot of guests, but are picking and choosing the bits we want from a traditional ceremony, so it won't be a big white wedding.

[TobyLerone]

Bloody hell, thistle! You're organised! You've sent invitations already? I still haven't sent all mine

[ViviPru]

Welcome Thistle :)

First dress fitting today - that's rather exciting, have you had it designed from scratch or adapting an existing design? Tell us all about it.

Tobes I feel like I wish it was sooner too, most of the big stuff is sorted but we've loads of less pressing but still arduous jobs to do and DP is doing his usual 'we don't have to worry about that now. There's ages yet'... Righto - that's what you said about your degree show project and look how that turned out ... I can just see us in the final days going out of our minds frantically sorting out the music and 'installations' and all the other tasks we supposedly had AGES to do

AKiss are you just going to leave things be with your future SiL, or have you thought about finding a way to say 'I'd still love you to be my bridesmaid, but understand if for whatever reason you'd prefer not to' - tricky to find the right words

[TobyLerone]

My BFF (also my 'wedding planner') is getting annoyed with me because I'm not giving her anything to do and because I can't bring myself to give a toss about centrepieces and because I refuse to have a table plan.

So I'm with your DP, Vivi :o

[ViviPru]

Would you mind if she just went off and sorted all that herself?

[TobyLerone]

Yes, very much! It's just not something that matters to me. It already feels a bit like I'm going to be pushed into things I don't want and I can feel my inner Bridezilla rising. I hope we're still friends afterwards!

[ViviPru]

She needs a little project to get her teeth into, something that will sate her desire to plan, make and organise. Something that doesn't really matter to you in the grand scheme of things but acts as a decoy to keep her occupied and prevents her from pushing you into choices you'd prefer not to have.

I did this with MiL. I have tasked her with 'the flowers' aka procuring and growing a load of spring flowering bulbs. She's taken is on with astonishing gusto and it's kept her right out of all of the other planning stuff. This could well all blow up in my face come the nuptials when she becomes flower-Hitler but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

[TobyLerone]

It's a good idea. I tend to think that it's not my job to satisfy other people, but that's because I am a contrary caaaaah :o

:o:o @ flower-Hitler

[AKissIsNotAContract]

Wow thistle, you are even more organised than me. Did you make your invitations? I've looked into it and it doesn't seem to work out much cheaper but maybe I'm looking in the wrong places.

I don't know what to do about future SIL. There's nothing worse than being a reluctant brideslave but then it's pretty rude if I just unask her.

What will you do without a seating plan Toby? Won't it turn into a bit of a free for all?

I've also put future mil in charge of flowers, good ploy to stop the interfering.

[TobyLerone]

A free for all is exactly what I want it to be! There will be more seats than there are people, and I want everyone to sit wherever they like and to move around and mingle. We're not really having a proper sit-down dinner anyway.

I made my invitations on Vistaprint, AKiss. They're maybe not as fancy as some, but I love them and have been complimented on them quite a lot. 'Fancy' just isn't us, anyway!

Just ask future-SIL outright if she'd still like to be a BM. Tell her you still want her to if she'd still like to, but that she's got a get-out clause now if she wants one.

[NumTum7]

Thistle that is super organised!! Good luck with the dress fitting - very exciting to have your dress made just for you - I had mine made in China so not quite the same but it was made to my measurements and fitted like a glove which is good cos im a weird shape Cannot believe you have done invites already - we didnt send ours until about 8 weeks before. We did make sure that anyone we couldn't live without being there knew the date as soon as we did though.

We had a relaxed wedding with no seating plan and it worked fine - people helped themselves to hog roast, salads, roast potaoes etc and then grabbed a bottle of their favourite wine and sat wherever they liked!

Cookielove (and anyone else who might be interested!) have posted a pic of my flowers on my profile. Also a pic of us in knitted form that someone made us as a wedding gift!

[littlemissstan]

I'm here too! September next year for me. This thread is very well timed as today I have received my florist quote (actually very good, hooray) and, more excitingly, my super-amazing customised pink and leopard print Converse with my married name on the back, which I shall be wearing for the reception. And my dress is short, so EVERYONE can bask in their glory :)

Am excited to have somewhere to vent wedding chat!

DP says I am not Bridezilla but Bridezuki...

[littlemissstan]

Oh, and have you all seen this that has been doing the internet rounds?

gawker.com/5948725/reasons-why-you-cannot-be-a-bridesmaid

[ViviPru]

Well I've just had a contender for Annoying Email of the week and it's not even 10am on Monday yet.

Between two of my bridesmaids we've been starting to formulate plans for a hen do. Friend A (MOH) has been in on the planning from the moment we got engaged. Friend B has a weekend work commitment that is definitely April, but she won't know what date until nearer the time. Friend A has been fully aware of this situation, A&B are very good friends with each other.

So I said ok then, lets rule out April altogether and plan it for March. Two of the weekends in March are school holiday, so that will be too expensive for people, so lets say the 14/15/16.

I've just had an email from A saying she may "potentially' be away skiing those dates in March, I am not sure and am just in early stages of working out when but trip could fall anywhere beteen end of feb and end of March as trying to avoid half term / Easter hols and will depend on group decision"

Yes I accept it's bridezilla-y to expect people to fit their plans around my wedding/hen do, and generally I wouldn't dream of doing so, but friend A has known all about the trickiness with dates with friend B and this is the first time I've heard about any skiing trip. Anyone else I'd say, well, fine, that's a shame if it clashes but nevermind, I'd love you to have been able to come but that's life, but this is the MOH who is supposed to be organising the hen do.

I wouldn't mind, but every step of the way I've tried to be accommodating with it, making sure I suggest ideas that are accessible and affordable and appeal to everyone. I'm fed up of them