How can I wean EBF 6 month old? Its not working and I can't go to work!

[HalfMumHalfBiscuit]

I am feeling trapped and really want someone else to help feed DD who is EBF. I just need someone else to be able to feed her once or twice a day so I can go to work or just have a little time to myself. I've been trying to get her to take a bottle for a month or so but have had no success. I am supposed to be going back to work in 1 months time but if she stays like this I won't be able to go.

We have tried 2 different kinds of bottles with formula or ebm. She just will not suck. It pours into her mouth and she spits it out. DH has also tried feeding her with no success.

Also so far she will not eat any solids. After speaking to my health visitor after she showed signs of being hungry, in the last 2 weeks I have tried baby rice with formula, pear puree, sweet potato puree and apple puree on separate occasions and at different times of day. I put the spoon in, she makes a face, rolls it about in her mouth and spits it out.

I have also tried BLW with banana, carrot and broccoli which she put in her mouth and spat out.

She is 6 months this week. She does seem hungry and wants to feed more often now. Last night she fed at 10pm, 3am and 6.30am.

I am sooo tired and a bit fed up. I just want to be able to get someone else to feed her. I also have a DS aged 3 which makes things more complicated with the feeding etc. I would like to start to cut down the breastfeeding gradually over the next few months. I hope someone can help.

Good point River, thanks.

Hey HalfMum - What are your childcare plans when you go to work? Have you spoken to them about giving your DD a bottle? You may well find that she'll do it for them but not for you. At least that's what I am hoping.

My DS is now poorly (temp, whimpering, runny nose, maybe teething too) so the bottle has had to be postponed again, not that we had any progress. He either just bites the teat or spits out any milk, and if he's hungry he'll really cry until he gets boob.

Aside from the trauma of cold turkey, the main problem I could see would be a risk of mastitis if quickly cutting feeds?

musicmaiden - DD will be in a nursery near my work and I have been thinking about talking to them about it, like you say she may do it for them?

In the next few weeks I am doing some KIT days and I should be able to pop round and breast feed if absolutely necessary although this would take 30-40 mins and would be a real hassle once I am back to work properly.

Hope your DS is better soon. I've stopped bothering with the bottle until the weekend when DH is back. Also have been so busy with various things, DS and work and stuff, so haven't been able to focus on poor DD's bottle/weaning progress.

As for mastitis. When I cut down last time it was one feed at a time so was fine. This time I dont' know how it will go.

Well it's worth telling the nursery I think, yes. They might have dealt with it before and will anyway make sure she is kept hydrated - does she take any water?

I spoke to my nursery manager about my DS and she warned me off breastfeeding on my days with him, saying that it will make him more miserable and hard to settle at nursery if he knows he doesn't get the boob on those days... which of course is not what River has said. Who knows!

Mastitis - my friend just went cold turkey with her bottle-rejecting DD, it worked but apparently she now has mastitis. I am wondering if expressing would work - ie express instead of a feed, then gradually cut the expressing.

Ah, the little monkeys, what trouble they are!

Also, have you tried formula in a cup yet? DS seems to think his Doidy is ok, and has taken a small amount of formula or water from it - really messy though and I can't imagine doing a whole feed from it yet or it being deemed a worthy replacement for the beloved sucking. But if your DD will take any at all it might make you feel a bit better about leaving her at nursery.

As for food - have you tried the Ella's Kitchen purees? DS (and all the other babies in my NCT group for that matter) v enthusiastic about the pumpkin/sweet potato/blueberry Stage 1 one, more so than my homemade efforts so far!

Suggestion for weaning food that they all like: yoghurt? With no bits in..!

Suggestion for taking a bottle - have you tried different types of teats - NUK? Breastflow bottle? Closer to Nature? (sorry if you have)

My Sister's baby went 24 hours before she would take EBM in a bottle, the little monkey...

Another suggestion - my DC3 wouldn't take a bottle for ages so I changed his water (at mealtimes) from a sippy cup to a bottle to get him used to the teat, within about two days he would take the bottle.

Another thing I've tried is cutting out the daytime feeds, so that I know he can go for working hours without a breastfeed, but kept them up at night.

Apologies is any of this advice is stuff you've tried or inappropriate - all just suggestions. E.g I know some people wouldn't dream of yoghurt for the sugar in it, but then, I sometimes feed my older DCs Macdonalds... bad mummy compromising mummy

Nonno - 24hours!!!!!!!!!
Have tried closer to nature and Nuk. Am going to try Mam next.
Will give yogurt a try later. Had no luck with sweet potato today. She doesn't sip from the sippy cup when I let her play with it. Usually wacks herself in the head. Will give it another go.

Don't worry about making lots of suggestions. The more the better really. I think a few people are looking at this thread so should be useful to others too.

Musicmaiden - I did look at those purees yesterday and was tempted to buy but daftly hoping that she will have home made food at least for a bit.

Right todays mission, give her a sippy cup again and ring nursery...

It was a grim 24 hours.

She is now the healthiest looking 5 year old you've every seen, with a huge (veggie!) appetite.

Keep persevering...

i had all this with dd too. i found the best thing was a cup totally unlike a boob iyswim. so not 'closer to nature' or 'nature flow' and all that. it didn't work trying to use something that was pretending to be a boob.

she like a free flow cup, either doidy cup or those toddler spouts you can add to avent bottles (with the no spill valve removed).

at nursery she had milk in cups that the toddlers had water in, not baby bottles like most others.

Interesting, Ruddynorah. How did you find out she preferred a cup? And did you have to 'train' her to drink formula from it? At what age did she start taking proper feeds from cups?

I am hoping DS will go this way, I must admit. I'd do anything to avoid the cold turkey method.

How's it gone today, HalfMum?

we tried every damn bottle and teat combination under the sun first!

she was breastfed to 8 months, by which time she was well established on solids and water with meals. so i felt she didn't need a lot of milk anyway. she had formula for 2 months, probably no more than morning, night and maybe and afternoon feed. and those formula feeds were small, like a small avent bottle that she wouldn't even finish. we then moved to cows milk at 10 months when she was just having milk on waking and at night.

i think i decided to try it because she was happy to have water from a doidy cup. but i felt she would need milk from a bottle as she would need the 'suck' IYSWIM! so for bed time for example she'd need to feed to sleep on a bottle. once we tackled moving away from that, the necessity of a bottle wasn't there. plus i had in the back of my mind that you should get them on a cup from 6 months so it seemed a bit backward to wean onto a bottle.

she'll be 4 next month and i'm now thinking ahead to all this with ds who is 5 months old!

Evening.

DH did the cold turkey bit yesterday.

I left the house with DS and left DH to it with DD.

The upshot is that she played around with the bottle but didn't really take any. He offered her some food too and she didn't have that either.

She had a nap and then I turned up about 2pm and she had an extra large feed.

Also I rang nursery and they are willing to give it a go too.

Like others have mentioned Im sure she won't starve when it comes to the crunch. Not going to try cold turkey til week after next when things calm down a bit here with various things/ visitors etc.

Well done on your efforts. If it helps, Sister's DD (the hold out for 24 hours baby) was left until Sister went back to work full time. This was with only a week to go.

Is she on a good percentile? She wasn't prem, was she? Can your HV offer any advice?

We did the cold turkey thing with DS this weekend and it actually went OK - he didn't even ask for the breast all day. He refused the milk I offered him in the cup. I held out until 5.30pm which is when I get home from work anyway, and then he had a big feed.

But he's now waking twice in the night, instead of only once....I feed him both times as I figure he's catching up on what he's missed out on in the day.

Now my worry is that my milk might dry up if he's only feeding three or four times in 24 hours - but hopefully after seven months my supply will be well established?

BunnyFrance

I personally wouldn't worry overly about your supply, it will adjust to LO's demands whatever they are. Better they adjust to 3-4 feeds now than leaking everywhere at work...

I would just get your CM to perserve with offering milk and trust your DS will take what he needs. And keep an eye on weight. That's what I am going to do if DS still refuses by then. In due course they will eat quite a bit more in solids.

(Caveat: I am all at sea with it too and it's all very worrying, isn't it... but I am sure as long as they seem happy ultimately and don't lose weight all will be well)

hi again. Back after a few days of being too tired to even log on.

bunnyfrance must be tiring for you to be up more in the night!

Strangely DD was up only at 6am last night after a day of no solids offered.

I am going to try again today with offering solids and see what happens.

On changing her nappy yesterday I could swear there was a bit of carrot in there??? But don't remember her eating any so she might be getting some in somehow.

Ah - carrot in the nappy, unmistakeable! Something is going in. .

My DS is better now which means I can't make excuses any longer - must try him on formula again...

HMHB, DS refused the bottle much of the time until he was coming up for 10mo! He was eating well by then so it wasn't so much of a problem but I went back to work when he was 6mo and was really worried at first. All turned out fine of course- some days not a drop of milk or morsel of food would pass his lips between 8am and 4pm. Pretty annoying when it's EBM going down the sink!He would then feed like a demon in the evening to make up for it so it all evened out. Little babies don't starve themselves- DS was particularly stubborn (no idea where that comes from) so would save himself for breastmilk in the evening but once he was eating well at around 8/9mo, I didn't worry anyway.
Good luck.

Hello, I'm reading all this with interest as have EBF DD 8 months old who refuses to drink anything all day. She was drinking happily out of a beaker at 6 months before I dropped a breast feed so I know she can drink. I've been back at work p/t 3 weeks and feeling decidedly flaky - she just makes up for any feeds through the night.

Have tried the cold turkey method, but caved in after 14 hours and several dry nappies. Not a good feeling - suspect I would have to leave DD 24 hours with someone else before she would touch a drop.

Just wanted to say you are not alone with this struggle and to wish you lots of luck with the feeding - mine is at least eating well, but you just need to know that something is going in during the day...

Foodwise - the HIPP banana porridge went down a treat! much better initially than the fruit and veg purees. Maybe worth trying purees with potato rather than baby rice, I think mine liked the taste better and at the other end it seemed to provide more grip!

Hi all,

Hairymelons, I got tired of throwing EBM down the sink and have found new and innovative ways of using it. Make your baby's food with it! I've made cauliflower cheese, pumpkin soup, mashed potato, porridge and all sorts with it and DS gobbles it up. And then at least I know he's upping his milk intake.

I'd second the HIPP porridge - I mix it with some cooked pear and he loves it.

BabiesEatTime - you must be exhausted - I am really worried my DS will do that, refuse all day then feed all night, urgh. How many times does your DD wake now for a feed?

And when you did cold turkey did she cry a lot?

I just don't know whether to persevere with a bottle or go to trying a cup instead now.

HalfMum... any more carrot?

Evening.

Just tried Ellas kitchen sweet potato etc puree and a couple of spoons might have gone in.

I will try the porridge idea. she dont seem to like baby rice. sorry bad typing - bfeedin g

still no joy on bottle.

she is in nursery for half a day on thurs so they will try her with a bottle then. I have 3 diff types of formula for her to try.

so not much progress this week but i am not stressing about it today

Hi Halfmum,

Sounds like progress. I found DS only took off with solids from 7 months (ie two weeks ago), but even so he's still quite fickle. He normally loves pumpkin, for example, but then wouldn't eat any of it today at the CM. So all he had all day was two yoghurts and porridge

Let us know how the bottle goes at the nursery.

Babieseattime - good to hear of someone else going through this. I was mega stressed about it (when fretting that no one else will ever be able to look after my baby and I will never be free) but have chilled a bit now.

I'll try again next week. Its her christening this weekend so won't stress about feeding/bottles too much. At least we won't get food stains on her outfit .