I need help gaining weight

[PeekabooAtTheZoo]

Hi I'm breastfeeding, vegan, 5'6".
I'm currently 49.8kg
My target weight is 55kg.
I just can't seem to keep weight on no matter what I do. I eat 3 good meals a day, I get gentle exercise, but I'm looking after a baby and a toddler by myself.

I was referred to dietetics when my weight hit 47kg after my first pregnancy and they advised badly. They kept going on about full fat milk and cheese and when I pointed out I can't have dairy, they said "well, vegan cheese." I had to explain to someone allegedly better-qualified than me that vegan cheese has a totally different nutritional profile to cheese (cheese has around 30g protein per 100g, vegan cheese has 2g at best). Then I never heard from them again because Covid. As I weaned my LO I saw an improvement and reached 52kg before I got pregnant again and lost all that progress due to Hyperemesis Gravidarum.

Dairy isn't an option as I have CMPA and if I have dairy, I get all the symptoms of coeliac.

I'm trying to cram in as many snacks as possible between meals which translates to surviving off whatever vegan chocolate is on offer this week, and I need to change but I don't know how. I don't even like chocolate that much. Can anyone point me in the right direction? I want to eat healthy but every time I stop fighting to gain weight and just enjoy plant-based meals and let my appetite dictate what I eat, my weight gets dangerously low.

I've had blood tests etc and all I get back is near-constant iron deficiency no matter what I do, even when I go back to eating beef.

I'd just like to add I'm not blaming veganism here at all.

Chocolate isn’t going to be very calorie dense. Can you eat nuts? I wish I was more qualifies but didn’t want to run. Perhaps you need to get a different dietician. Or even a good personal trainer. They often have ways to bulk up?

“I'm trying to cram in as many snacks as possible between meals which translates to surviving off whatever vegan chocolate is on offer this week, and I need to change but I don't know how“

So how come you can educate yourself about the defence between vegan “cheese” and actual cheese, but not other foodstuffs?

Why are you reaching for chocolate as a snack, instead of something high in fat, like an avocado? If you want high calorie and high fat food - peanut butter will be better than chocolate.

I am not a vegan, but it would take me 10 seconds to Google “high fat vegan foods” and I bet it would give good suggestions for you.

I have CMPA, BF and lost weight. It can be hard to stay stable never mind gain can't it?

Could you massively up your snacks and try things that are accidentally vegan?

Just seen this is the vegan topic - as I mentioned I’m not a vegan, if anyone wonders why I’m on this section, it came up as trending!

Out of interest are you began by choice or because of the cmpa? Obviously there are easy non vegan non cow milk options available.

Being anaemic probably isn't helping but you can be anaemic and fat, so if you're fine with it I won't comment.

you're probably getting the nutrition it's just calories. So little things like fry/roast get rather than boiling, more dressing on salad, full sugar soft drinks, syrup rather than squash, croutons on salad/soup, butter all sandwiches.

Are you taking a supplement for your Anemia too @PeekabooAtTheZoo? It can be very hard to weight gain for some people with Anemia.

@Testina confrontational much? I don't know if fat is the issue, or if it's protein or carbs or something else entirely. That's why I'm asking for help. It took a lot to post this as I've been trying to manage it by myself since 2008 in fear of being told I'm "weight shaming" or other shit like that, but thanks for your opinion that what I'm doing isn't good enough. I might possibly be aware that I am useless and shit at this.

Nuts, frying tofu, oil dressings on salad, avocados, eating slightly bigger portions, having nut butters with snacks, pasta with creamy sauces (oatly double cream is high fat content but even alpro soy single cream will thicken up nicely when heated), curries with full fat coconut milk - loads of things you can try to add calories without losing nutrients or resorting to chocolate.

As far as the iron is concerned the Dr should have prescribed tablets? It can take a while to get things where they should be and then take a regular supplement to maintain. If it is an ongoing issue then your Dr should investigate really, particularly if it is no different when eating meat.

@Ijustreallywantacat thanks that's a good idea. Do you need to be part of a gym to have a PT? I am alone with 2 babies so can't really go to the gym (there are none around here with a creche) but that will change next month when I move from rural Ireland to Watford.

What do you eat in an average day?

What do you eat in a day?
I'm overweight and maintaining that weight at the moment so I'm probably eating around 2400 calories a day. I eat breakfast of toast - 2 pieces, one with peanut butter. Lunch at the moment is pretty much always a salad, with seeds, proper dressing with olive oil, tofu and some carb either new potatoes, pasta or sweet potato. Dinner is often stir fry but with plenty of sweet chilli sauce etc and I almost always have a dessert such as a vegan magnum, sorbet or some chocolate.
I don't snack in between so my meals are calorie dense enough to maintain my weight which is about 1.5 of you!
tell us your meals and let's see what we can advise :)

Thanks I'll take a look at those. And I am supposed to be taking ferrous sulphate but I manage it about 1 day in 3 because it upsets my stomach and ferrous fumarate has pork gelatin in it.

How about making yourself a lovely veggie pilaf like this, adding nuts for protein and serve with a yummy spicy vegan curry, eg saag paneer, but with tofu for the paneer, obv. You could accompany with a delicious Bavarian weissbier.
www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/rice-recipes/veggie-pilaf/

Then eat lots of it, followed by a couple of these beauties :
www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/vegan-cherry-almond-brownies

Just a suggestion but you might have an over active thyroid.

Thanks these are all great suggestions to get more calories in. I can have nuts but my son has peanut allergy so cutting peanut butter over the last two years has probably tipped me over the edge from "barely maintaining my weight" to "not managing at all".

Have a look at Spatone @PlanetNormal. It's Vegsn and is much kinder on your tummy.

So an average day (this was yesterday):
Breakfast: Toast or some chocolate biscuits depending on whether I have time to make toast. I'll usually put vegemite on my toast.
Lunch: A packet of instant noodles with some sunflower seeds sprinkled over it for protein.
Dinner: Pea nuggets and chips. I cooked 14 nuggets but ate 10 because my toddler wanted four more of my nuggets.
Snacks: 1 big sharing sized packet of some weird puffer chips that I thought were going to be tortillas but they weren't. Toddler had a handful and I had the rest. 1 big bar of NOMO chocolate (85g? 100g? The packet's gone outside to the wheelie bin so I can't check).
Drinks: About 8 cups of tea and coffee both with Alpro coconut barista.

@PlanetNormal That sounds delicious. Never occurred to me to sub paneer for tofu. I love tofu.
@ShellySG would that not be in the bloods they did before? I've asked the GP about it in the past and not heard that I needed to worry about it. I might ring them up and ask if they can test for it specifically.

There are alternative nut butters - probably also possible to make yourself ( ok my children are adults now) to add on your toast

Sorry I meant to tag in Peeka not Planet.

• Nut butters
• Avocado- avocado on toast with salt and chilli grinder would be a good snack
• Fry tofu- if you coat in cornflour and then fry in oil you get a fantastic, crispy texture. You can then add it into dishes at the end and it will stay crispy. A tip I've picked up is drain your tofu, freeze it and then take it out and press it. The freezing changes the texture slightly and helps firm it up.
• Fried rice. You need to use plenty of oil for the cold rice to fry up properly so it's never going to be a low fat dish. Just omit the egg and serve with pickled vegetables or if that's not your thing, salt and pepper broccoli etc.
• Pasta dishes. Use vegan pesto, oatly creme fraiche, vegan cream etc.

These are all the things I'd like to eat but have to limit myself as I am overweight! I'm not vegan but I don't eat meat and try and eat plant based as much as possible.

Also, if there isn't a vegan iron supplement that works for you or isn't easily available then please don't beat yourself up about the pork gelatine. The Vegan Society recognises that it's not always possible of practical to avoid animal products entirely, especially when it comes to medication.

@PritiPatelsMaker OMG loads of changes! Belvita and party rings, here I come! Very excited to see the cakes, I spend so much time staring at ingredients whenever I go near the cake aisle.

Well you’re just not eating enough, that’s very clear
Have oats with fruit or dairy free yoghurt with fruit/granola/cereal if you’re having toast have something calorific into and fruit and yoghurt on the side
Lunch, well just have a sandwich, veg & hummus, crisps whatever but basically a lot more calories than one pack of noodles
And dinner seems a bit of an odd one, something like lasagna or cottage pie, a burger, a pizza?

Seems like you’re not even trying tbh, there is also no fruit or veg in your usual day?

And yes- saag paneer but with tofu instead of paneer is delicious. I made two versions a couple of weeks ago as we had both vegans and non vegans and honestly, I struggled to tell the difference between the two as I marinated the tofu in the same spices etc, and then coated in cornflour and fried. The tofu actually had a much nicer texture than the paneer so that was the giveaway more than taste!