I need help gaining weight

[PeekabooAtTheZoo]

Hi I'm breastfeeding, vegan, 5'6".
I'm currently 49.8kg
My target weight is 55kg.
I just can't seem to keep weight on no matter what I do. I eat 3 good meals a day, I get gentle exercise, but I'm looking after a baby and a toddler by myself.

I was referred to dietetics when my weight hit 47kg after my first pregnancy and they advised badly. They kept going on about full fat milk and cheese and when I pointed out I can't have dairy, they said "well, vegan cheese." I had to explain to someone allegedly better-qualified than me that vegan cheese has a totally different nutritional profile to cheese (cheese has around 30g protein per 100g, vegan cheese has 2g at best). Then I never heard from them again because Covid. As I weaned my LO I saw an improvement and reached 52kg before I got pregnant again and lost all that progress due to Hyperemesis Gravidarum.

Dairy isn't an option as I have CMPA and if I have dairy, I get all the symptoms of coeliac.

I'm trying to cram in as many snacks as possible between meals which translates to surviving off whatever vegan chocolate is on offer this week, and I need to change but I don't know how. I don't even like chocolate that much. Can anyone point me in the right direction? I want to eat healthy but every time I stop fighting to gain weight and just enjoy plant-based meals and let my appetite dictate what I eat, my weight gets dangerously low.

I've had blood tests etc and all I get back is near-constant iron deficiency no matter what I do, even when I go back to eating beef.

I found that just having fattier things didn’t help me put on weight, but what did help was the more I managed to eat, the hungrier I started to become, so my overall calorie count slowly went up and I eventually put on weight. It took a while though.

For me it was upping the protein but doing things like adding Olive Oil to your Avo on toast won't hurt.

If you want a meal that your DS can have as well how about olive oil mash with vegan sausage and veg sliced bananas and custard for pudding?

If you reckon you need more protein, scrambled tofu on wholemeal toast is great. You could sprinkle seeds over it, to increase fat and calorie density.
I also think you need way more fresh fruit and veg, to prevent vitamin and mineral deficiencies. I wish you well

Looking at your typical day, you don't have much fresh cooked stuff.

Some recipes are not time consuming. You can make a quick cheats 'Thai vegan curry' by stirring a jar of full cat coconut milk together with a big tablespoonful of nut butter and one of sweet chilli sauce, heat it up then tip in sugar snap peas, baby corns, chunks of tofu, sliced red peppers and spring onions. Serve with sticky rice.

In ready meal sections of supermarkets you can get aubergine curry and dahl as 'side dishes' which would make a great quick lunch with a flat bread or pouch of rice.

Buy a bottle of really nice oil based salad dressing and drizzle it on every time you have even a bit of iceberg or a sliced tomato (or salad) - loads of extra calories instantly.

If you need iron and the tablets have pork gelatin, get Floradix. Plant-based and much kinder on the stomach, as wlel as more effective.

If you like tofu, get smoked tofu, dip in a thin sauce of cornflour mixed with water, then roll in dry cornflour mixed with sesame seeds and seasoning. Pan fry. Eat with sweet chilli sauce and rice. Bit of a faff with washing up, but really tasty - the oil and seeds add calories to tofu.

Have avocados mashed on seedy toast with walnuts and sliced tomatoes on top as a quick lunch or breakfast.

I also add frozen peas to anything and everything, they are a really good source of protein.

Snack on a banana and two chocolate digestive or hobnobs (vegan versions easy to find) with an oatmilk latte. That's about 350-400 calories without even trying.

You need to really ramp up how much you're eating, to gain weight you need to aim for at least 3000 cals a day. For some people it takes a lot more than that.

Can you add avocado oil or coconut cream to foods? I make a vegan curry which is frying an onion and garlic in olive oil, add curry powder and any other spices you like, add a tin of chickpeas and a tin of full fat coconut milk. You can add red lentils as well for extra protein, stir and cook for half an hour or so.

That's a cheap and easy high calorie meal, ideally you'd have it with some naans and fried rice as well.

@PritiPatelsMaker thanks I will definitely grab a bag of those next time I'm in the supermarket, I'm running down the frozen food at the moment ready to move (so I'm probably eating weirder meals than usual because it's all random spring rolls and Lidl Specials like those pea nuggets). I think getting some avocado in would be money well spent though even if I don't finish it before we go, just for a boost so I can actually finish packing etc.
@567and Yes that's exactly it, I'm just grabbing at whatever! This week I've started to set phone reminders for meal times. Even when I increase my fat intake it's not making a huge difference. It never occurred to me that those "extra" foods could be helping me increase my appetite, though. How long did it take you to get back to a healthy weight?
@Cocowatermelon That sounds delicious. One of my favourites (that I don't make nearly enough although I had it last week to try and use up the frozen beans) is loubieh bi zait which is beans simmered in olive oil with Lebanese 7 spice, it sounds like your suggestion might go with that quite nicely. I've never tried coconut cream in coffee but I always have some in the house to make Thai Green Curry, if you mean the cartons in the Asian cooking aisle.
@Spabreak I love hummus. I bought some a few weeks ago and it's gone out of date in the fridge because I forgot to get anything to put it on/dip in it. I should probably take it out and get some more.

Nuts and dried fruit. Make up a trail type mix and snack throughout the day? I'd also look at your protein intake to increase it

You don't need to buy expensive vegan chocolate. Hobnobs, pink wafers, party rings, ginger nuts, most crisps - all vegan. Have a couple of packs dotted round for whenever you fancy snacking.

Add dips to any meal. Guacamole, houmous, baba ghanoush, tahini all easy to buy and make and can be very calorie dense.

Olive oil added to anything that can take it.

Drinks- replace a couple of the cups of tea with smoothies or fruit juice.

@PeekabooAtTheZoo
Yep, those cartons of coconut cream you use in Thai green curry are exactly what I mean. That stuff is much higher in calories than a coconut based milk substitute would be (like the kind you might find in the aisle with almond/rice/soymilk).

Give it a really good shake before you open the carton to redistribute the fat - coconut cream can separate after a while.

Yes, those ones! I'm obsessed with them, you can also order them online from some stuff places. I've also frozen them and they've been absolutely fine, so if you do see them, stock up and freeze!

*food places/online supermarkets.

I wouldn't like to see your shooing bill this week @PeekabooAtTheZoo after all of these suggestions!

I'm just having a cuppa now and could murder a Party Ring.

*shopping.

What is it with my spelling today?

This is so interesting as someone who also struggles massively to put on and maintain weight. Don't want to hijack the thread at all but just wondered how you deal with the risk of higher cholesterol as you get older with fattier foods? There's a fine balance to be had here I'm thinking..

@PeekabooAtTheZoo I’ll admit it did take me a good year to gain enough weight to feel better in myself. I found it hard to change habits and make time for myself. People laughed when I told them I found it difficult to gain weight and eat more, after all, what’s so hard about eating an extra mars bar or bag of chips. Those things did nothing though. Keep going, you’ll get there!

Don't want to hijack the thread at all but just wondered how you deal with the risk of higher cholesterol as you get older with fattier foods?

Honestly, I've never thought about my Cholesterol. Mine has always been low and when I was trying to gain weight I still wasn't eating cream cakes, burgers it cheese which I imagine are probably amongst the worst things for your cholesterol.

8 cups a day... How much caffeine are U ingesting daily?
My babies were sensitive to me having caffeine, I couldn't have as much as you.
I'd like you to have some fruit & veg in there.

It reads like a low fibre diet, too.

The ferous fumerate tablets that I take are suitable for vegetarians, so they do not contain pork gelatine. Maybe try a different brand?

My babies were sensitive to me having caffeine, I couldn't have as much as you

I had to swap to decaf. Caffeine really didn't suit my first.