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Vegan

Join Mumsnet's vegan community and discuss everything related to the vegan diet.

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Original poster

Raising vegan DC with meat eating DH

121 replies

MissBax · 08/12/2017 16:40

I'm just wondering how people found raising children vegan if other parent is a meat eater? When teaching them to respect animals and not eat them did they ever ask why daddy/mummy eats meat? How did you answer this or justify it?! Thanks :)

OP posts:

Whatslovegottodo · 09/12/2017 13:33

lapinr0se congratulations I'm dyslexic, however I am still educated to masters level and am wise enough not to mock or belittle others.

NoelNiki · 09/12/2017 14:04

lapinr0se congratulations I'm dyslexic, however I am still educated to masters level and am wise enough not to mock or belittle others.

This and also autocorrect. My phone's latest update it autocorrecting to ridiculous words and spelling even when I try and override it.

MotherCupboard · 09/12/2017 14:35

The op didn't come here for discussion and judgement about a vegan diet.

NoelNiki · 09/12/2017 15:00

No but she sure is happy to judge a meat diet. Over and over and over.

She may well end up us and them with her husband misguided in thinking she has any moral high ground.

Original poster

MissBax · 09/12/2017 15:05

NoelNiki - well the whole principle of veganism is by its very nature against a meat diet. I don't judge meat eaters though. However I have been judged on here (a vegan forum) personally - feel sorry for my DH/forcing children into something blah blah.
If you'd like to point out where I've judged any meat eaters please be my guest.
And if you're unhappy with the fundamentals of veganism then I suggest you remove yourself from this post and don't engage on the 'vegan' thread again.

OP posts:

BornAgainFem · 09/12/2017 15:09

NoelNiki - you win today's goady fucker prize. Congrats.

MotherCupboard · 09/12/2017 19:46

Oh no the very idea of a vegan posting on a vegan forum for advice. She didnt ask whether people approve of veganism.

Mayhemmumma · 09/12/2017 19:49

Be careful with young children and diet. I was bought up strict veggie and I blame this for my being over weight, having IBD and serious anaemia years on (requiring lots of meds and injections). I was fed an awful carb heavy cheap diet, yes I'd eat veg but not enough protein. I only started eating meat at 26 (as was struggling to conceive)

Original poster

MissBax · 10/12/2017 08:57

Mayhem - thanks for sharing your experience :) it sounds like you were fed a pretty bad diet, although I don't think that is based on it being vegetarian - more that parents must have just not understood healthy eating. I too was raised as a veggie (don't know what a strict veggie is though?) and was a very healthy child, and a very healthy adult,although I did suffer with migraines and acne which both stopped when I cut out dairy. When I'd been vegan for a year I got all my bloods tested and they're completely normal.

OP posts:

Shiggle · 10/12/2017 16:39

I was a vegan kid raised by a vegan mum and a meat eating Dad. It was actually a complete nightmare for me as a kid. I was always the odd one out bringing my own party food in a bag. My dad thought it was ridiculous and I forever felt that tension. Eventually I started eating meat in my teens having been excluded from play dates/parties as a kid. I remember my mom telling me animals were sentient beings and screaming back "so am I!" as a teen. If you live in a place like London then maybe but I'd at least go veggie so they can at least eat a cheese pizza at a party. I later became vegetarian as adult but it was my choice. When the kids came along I gave them my reasons and let them choose but out no pressure on them. So far 1/4 is veggie. But the two little ones are two little to choose. They all eat a fairly veggie diet simply because I cook the food. For me though it needs to be their choice.

MongerTruffle · 10/12/2017 16:44

Can children be vegan? No eggs, protein, etc

Human breast milk (designed by evolution to be perfect for human infants) is only a few percent protein. Even if you were to eat the (plant) foods with the lowest protein contents, you would still get more than enough.

Please note that I am not a vegan.

Original poster

MissBax · 10/12/2017 18:45

Shiggle - as I said up post DH is happy for them to be veggie, as am I when out and about. At home we always eat vegan meals as I cook, and don't feel I need to change that personally.

OP posts:

Original poster

MissBax · 10/12/2017 18:46

MongerTruffle

Exactly :)

OP posts:

Shiggle · 10/12/2017 18:58

I wasn't passing comment, I was relating my own experience. Sorry if that didn't come across.

tiptopteepe · 10/12/2017 19:01

'stop forcing your ridiculous choices on your child'

why is veganism ridiculous and meat eating not? They are both diet CHOICES made by parents that are passed down to kids.

I personally think the amount of meat some people consume is utterly ridiculous. But I also think parents have a right to bring a child up within their own belief system as long as its lawful and not harming anyone else.

tiptopteepe · 10/12/2017 19:07

and I am veggie. My DH does eat meat now and again but doesnt cook it in the house will just eat it if he goes out for dinner etc.
Our son is also veggie. Again I feel like if im cooking something then I will cook veggie food. When our son is older if he wants to eat meat that is his choice but I am not paying for it or cooking it for him. What he does out with his friends is up to him when hes older. What he buys with his own money and brings back to cook is up to him. I certainly wont bang on about it to him or anything. But I will make it clear that I dont want to personally touch meat or pay money for it.

I think it just about teaching your child to respect the choices of others and explaining why people may make those choices.
So I wouldnt say anything which could be construed as anti your partners choice... just refer your child to him for answers about why he eats meat and explain your own personal reasons for not eating meat.

Oliversmumsarmy · 11/12/2017 14:03

I was told that feeding dd and ds a vegetarian diet from birth would stunt their growth. Dd is 5ft 10" and taller than either her df or me.

I had to take ds to see a Dr who obviously didn't approve of our diet. He looked at the chart and ds's current height and told me if I didn't change ds's lifestyle he would only reach 6ft 2"

Apparently the same chart said dd would only reach 5ft 5"

dkb15164 · 12/12/2017 00:14

I think you should both leave your opinions about food and your thoughts on meat and his thoughts on veganism out of it. Don't make a young kid pick which side is 'right'. Showing them the benefits of both lifestyles and giving them a balanced lifestyle is the way to go. The kid eats vegan with you and meat with their dad. When they're older they can make a decision. Right now a mixture of both diets isn't going to hurt them.

Chippyway · 09/02/2018 16:15

Oh my god

How ironic - meat eaters coming onto a vegan board complaining about vegans shoving their opinions in people’s faces

OP I’ve been veggie for 15 years now. DP is a huge meat eater but will happily eat veggie meals cooked by me and will often cook veggie meals for us as well

We don’t have kids yet but I’ve always wondered similar to your OP.
I will 100% be raising my children as vegetarians. I’m in the process of cutting out dairy but have a long way to go until I want to class myself as vegan.

I don’t understand why people complain it’s unfair that you’re forcing your child into being vegetarian/vegan, when meat eaters will happily force their child into eating meat? Technically speaking you can’t force something away from somebody when they’ve never had it, however you CAN force something onto somebody - so the only people doing the ‘forcing’ here are the meat eaters.

Anyway, I plan on raising my kids to treat animals with love, respect and dignity and to not view them as food. If they question why DP eats them I’ll just say it’s his choice, however the kindest thing to do is to not eat them.

DialsMavis · 09/02/2018 16:26

I am a new vegan, was omni until NYD. DD and DH pescetarian but happy to eat what I cook. DS eats any old crap.
I dont think you can raise your DC vegan if your DH is omni. Feed them vegan and explain why you feel the way you do.

kikisparks · 11/03/2018 07:47

Want to offer you some hope OP. I’m not a Mum yet (working on it) but my DH of 13 years initially agreed the future children would be raised veggie, then agreed they’d be raised vegan, then after 12 years went vegan himself! I’ve been vegan the last 8 years. My husband used to eat a chicken a day. It could happen for you.

But if he stays eating meat you just need to give the child a morally consistent message. Kids get it. They watch babe, bambi, dumbo, finding nemo and with gentle education they can follow the message that animal farming, hunting, circuses, fishing are wrong. I know because I was raised vegetarian as a child. So was my brother. We were both never sick and grew up tall and strong. When I found out eggs and dairy were also cruel I went vegan and my parents and brother followed suit. Both my parents were veggie though. I used to worry about this when my husband ate meat. See if you can agree an age appropriate message you’re both comfortable with.

Some links for diet plan ideas:

www.vrg.org/nutshell/kids.php

www.firststepsnutrition.org/pdfs/Eating_well_for_veg_infants_for_web.pdf

I plan to use these when working out the best diet for my future child(ren).

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